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Great Moments in stupid steroids grandstanding

Aug 11, 2009, 10:59 AM EDT

Newsday’s Wallace Matthews will not be out-crazied by anyone. After positing — against all evidence, really — that Bud Selig will be remembered as a worthless, failed, commissioner, he suggests one way for the Budster to rehabilitate his legacy:

The way he can do it is simple. All Bud Lite has to do is declare that – under the powers granted the commissioner to act in the best interests of the game – baseball will once again recognize Roger Maris as the all-time single-season home-run leader and Hank Arron [sic] as baseball’s career home-run king.

End of story, cue the crescendo, ring down the curtain on a transcendent commissionership.

Matthews says such a move would take “courage” and “integrity.”  If by courage and integrity he means “stupidity” and “ignorance,” sure, I’m totally with him. And that stupidity goes beyond Wallace’s seeming inability to spell Hank Aaron’s name.

Setting aside all of the chaos such a move would foment, when does Wallace propose that baseball start recognizing records again?  Now? Ten years from now?  Tell us, Wallace, when did the “steroid era” begin and end?  Also, given that one of the most high-profile steroids cheats of the era was a pitcher, what does Matthews propose to do about those records?

And while we’re asking questions, does Matthews even think that steroids are a problem apart form how they impact the big records?  Because as I sit here right now, I can’t recall him ever commenting on what steroids mean for, say, the borderline minor leaguer or the desperate veteran just trying to hang on. With Matthews, steroids only matter for one reason: records, records, records.  Though Matthews probably counts that as three reasons (using his fingers for the counting).

Here’s some advice, kids: whenever someone is peddling simplistic solutions to difficult problems, they’re almost always 100% full of it.  Steroids in baseball and how they impact the big records is a complicated issue. Matthews’ solution is so brainless, it gives the concept of simplicity a bad name.  You do the math.

  1. Jason @ IIATMS - Aug 11, 2009 at 11:50 AM

    “Newsday’s Wallace Matthews will not be out-crazied by anyone”
    Bill Plaschke might have something to say about this.

  2. rocky - Aug 11, 2009 at 12:47 PM

    well at least, as far back as I can remember, Maris and Aaron were not using enhancement drugs, but leave it to the news media to keep the pot stirred, why dont we now divide the white, black, brown players LOL, and become segregated again, thats another to keep controversy going also, great idea mmmm Damn bigots. think were all americans, not just colors. Dopes. Drugs are drugs, if it says illegal, it means illegal, what part of word meaning 101 do the not understand. Im in favor of it, use steriods and your name is stricken, go get a real job and learn what it like to support these over payed cry baby’s, let them make a measely $20,000 a year.

  3. Jason - Aug 11, 2009 at 1:20 PM

    rocky – Didn’t Aaron admit to using greenies?

  4. Cofranco - Aug 11, 2009 at 1:23 PM

    Hey, sure, leave the records in the books….But next to it notate that it was “drug enhanced”. Damn cheats.

  5. Jason - Aug 11, 2009 at 1:25 PM

    Is this the f’ing twilight zone?

  6. Stan Jones - Aug 11, 2009 at 1:47 PM

    Then I want Tommy John’s pitching records (and those of all these players, too, to be marked as TJ-enhanced.

  7. lindenw - Aug 11, 2009 at 2:52 PM

    Crazy to the upmost degree, Leave the crazy talk where its belong in the trash. Just this week, both MLB and the Player union discuss the 2003 list of peoples who supposed to test positive for something. The bottomline is that if the people who really know the information can’t getting together. Who are we to judge information that is not accurate nor verified, let’s wait and see the complete list and what they test for before we judge any of these players.

  8. Michael - Aug 11, 2009 at 3:43 PM

    Except we WON’T be seeing “the complete list,” for reasons already thoroughly discussed, rehashed, challenged and then reaffirmed.

  9. Jason @ IIATMS - Aug 11, 2009 at 4:27 PM

    And those who had Lasik surgery. And ACL/MCL surgery. And used Ben-Gay. And DMSO.

  10. Ron - Aug 11, 2009 at 9:00 PM

    Tony Pena, Jr had Lasik surgery. Does that mean all of his hitting stats will have to be expunged?

  11. Ron - Aug 11, 2009 at 9:00 PM

    Tony Pena, Jr had Lasik surgery. Does that mean all of his hitting stats will have to be expunged?

  12. Jack - Aug 18, 2009 at 7:14 AM

    The list itself is not reliable.

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