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The Red Sox steal a member of the Yankee Universe

Mar 15, 2010, 12:17 PM EDT

Thinking of the Yankees-Red Sox rivalry as the Cold War, this little episode doesn’t exactly rank up there with the formation of the Warsaw Pact or the Cuban Missile Crisis. As far as provocations go it’s somewhere between Lyndon Johnson sending the Marines to the Dominican Republic to fight communists in 1965 and the North Koreans capturing the U.S.S. Pueblo.

Wait, it’s not even on that level. This is more Nikita Koloff’s face-turn to join forces with Dusty Rhodes against his Uncle Ivan and Krusher Khrushchev.

This will all be more fully explained when my nine-volume history of the Yankees-Red Sox rivalry comes out next year.  It will be turned into a documentary narrated by Morgan Freeman. True story.

  1. enough already - Mar 15, 2010 at 12:25 PM

    Good riddance!

  2. Old Gator - Mar 15, 2010 at 12:42 PM

    Yeah, that was a pretty dumb comment, but I think that he was canting his humor about the same way as those Red Sox Nation commercials Craig embedded here last week did – exaggerating the issue to parody how absurd the entire rivalry issue has become. It’s not as if he said something he honestly meant to be offensive, you know, like “It’s OK as long as he’s not a lawyer.”
    Other than that, he really looks like he’s busting out of that Red Sox jersey like a seventeen year locust escaping its pupate phase. With those glasses, he’s got a face like one too.
    “God Bless America” isn’t my idea of a replacement for “The Star Spangled Banner” either. To much jingoistic superstition. And to the idiot who posted to that article about Tynan that liberals want to take God out of the pledge of allegiance but don’t mind “In God We Trust” being mentioned on money, I would recommend this: go into an expensive restaurant and have yourself a big meal – crab royale, a sorbet intermezzo, kobe beef with asparagus hollandaise, kierschalgershtupptorte with Galapagos shade-grown dark roast coffee, a waffer-theen meent and a jeroboam of Moet – and when the waiter brings the check, recite the Pledge of Allegiance by way of payment. Now do you understand the difference, you politically atavistic moron?

  3. Wooden U. Lykteneau - Mar 15, 2010 at 1:02 PM

    Actually, this is more like signing away Mike Stanley.

  4. YankeesfanLen - Mar 15, 2010 at 1:22 PM

    Yeah, let’s see them get Kate Smith-or Irving Berlin for that matter.

  5. Joey B - Mar 15, 2010 at 1:52 PM

    As a RS fan with NYY tickets, I’d much prefer him to stay in NY. He’s got a stunning voice, and a great life story.

  6. enough already - Mar 15, 2010 at 2:03 PM

    Nice one, Gator! (Unfortunately, I didn’t get to see the post you referred to.) But as for the “he didn’t mean it that way” excuse, yeah, he did.

  7. JH0088 - Mar 15, 2010 at 3:15 PM

    Hmmm…. From the article:
    State Sen. Jack Hart (D-Suffolk), who hosts the event annually, convinced Tynan to throw a Red Sox jersey over his shirt and tie.
    “Look at that, isn’t that great?” state Sen. Hart said at the event considered a roast of the political who’s who of Massachusetts.
    Isn’t what great, Senator, that you’ve managed to endorse the hatred of Jews and co-opt the Red Sox into Tynan’s brand of anti-semitism at the same time?
    I’m sure the team is thrilled with you, that is if they even manage to put the association of their team name and logo with the bigoted Tynan together. But seeing as the twelve Jews in all of Boston probably weren’t paying attention today, this will wind up sliding under the radar.

  8. Old Gator - Mar 15, 2010 at 7:33 PM

    In 2000, the Jewish population of Boston was estimated at 245,000 by demographic sources for the the UJA and JVL (Jewish Virtual Library), and Boston is currently rated as having the fastest growing Jewish population of any major urban area in the US. I’d be interested in knowing how virulently resentful that unaccounted-for 244,988 Jews of yours feel about Tynan. My gut feeling is that most of them, following his apology, probably don’t give a flying fark at a rolling donut anymore.

  9. tadthebad - Mar 15, 2010 at 7:52 PM

    The difference between money and the Pledge is simple enough. Not sure why one can’t argue against using God for both, not that I would. Sure are some fancy food words, though – that was impressive.

  10. Joey B - Mar 16, 2010 at 8:53 AM

    If you’re trying to confuse the poster by using facts, don’t bother, he sounds like a hater. It was a weak attempt at humor by Tynan. He apologized. Just like with Torii Hunter, you move on. There are limits, but we really need to live in a world where you can tell the occasionally Irish joke, Polish joke, etc.

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