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So I'm in the World Series

Apr 22, 2010, 11:16 AM EDT

Fantasy baseball nerd.jpgI mentioned a long time ago that I was participating in a simulation league for media guys. The game: Rob Neyer Baseball. It’s a historical league based on the Diamond Mind platform, and I am owner/general manager/manager of the Matewan Massacre. Other owners include Neyer himself, Jonah Keri, ESPN Boston’s Gordon Edes, Baseball Prospectus’ Rany Jazayerli, Josh Wilker of Cardboard Gods fame, FanGraphs’ Carson Cistulli and many others. It’s been a load of fun, but the season is almost over.

I’ve done well: I beat Mr. Neyer’s very own team to advance to the World Series, but
make no mistake about it: I’m an underdog against Jazayerli’s team, The Process, which finished the year with the best record in the league. He’s up 1-0 after a gem by his ace, Brett Saberhagen, and probably has a better top-to-bottom club than I do, but I have not yet given up.

The Massacre won its division with an 88-74 record, powered by an MVP season by Barry Bonds (.299/.421/.585 43 HR, 124 RBI in what turned out to be a really low-offense league).  Don’t look at me that way; the Massacre does not have a morals clause in its player contracts. Heck, my backup shortstop is former Chicago Black Sox Swede Risberg for cryin’ out loud. My rotation — which surprisingly became a strength as the season wore on — is populated by several fat, alcoholic 1940s and 50s pitchers. The closest thing I have to model citizens on the team are Luis Sojo and Clint Hurdle, but they were bench warmers all year. We’re all about winning in Matewan.

Game 2 of the World Series will take place later today, with three games tomorrow and the final two on Saturday if necessary.  I’ll let you know how my fellas do. If they win, Katie bar the door, because they know how to celebrate right-proper down in Matewan.

  1. YankeesfanLen - Apr 22, 2010 at 11:27 AM

    That’s a picture worth a thousand words! We’ll be busy all afternoon!
    1. Pack of Newports
    2. Pin dot printer.
    C’mon guys, psrlor game time!

  2. t ball - Apr 22, 2010 at 11:51 AM

    You could at least use a more recent pitcher. That one looks at least a year old.

  3. JTrain - Apr 22, 2010 at 11:58 AM

    Hey, Craig, could you perhaps do a post on how simulation baseball works. I play fantasy baseball, and I’ve heard of simulation baseball, but I’m not sure how it really works. Obviously, according to this post, you can have players from many different eras, but how do you determine who has who? Do you have a draft? An auction? What types of players are valuable in sim-baseball?

  4. The Rabbit - Apr 22, 2010 at 12:01 PM

    Best of luck, Craig, particularly with the staff.
    I’m a huge fan of any baseball player who looks out of shape. Sid Fernandez was one of my personal favorites.

  5. MikeZ - Apr 22, 2010 at 12:11 PM

    Watching game 2 now, I guess anything is better than doing actual work.

  6. MikeZ - Apr 22, 2010 at 12:29 PM

    Tough break in game 2 Craig. Ashburn took it 2 you with those doubles. And McGraw with the save, can’t shake those Phils, even in yesteryear.
    Looks like Bonds needs another virtual PED shot in the ass.

  7. Andy II - Apr 22, 2010 at 12:45 PM

    It’s easy to say this now, but I wish I could’ve gambled on this league. I would’ve taken Rany for sure–the man was banned by the Royals, he has to be doing something right.

  8. Matt M - Apr 22, 2010 at 12:52 PM

    Matewan Massacre
    Love the name. I always knew you too were a no-good Commie.

  9. smsetnor - Apr 22, 2010 at 1:24 PM

    Wow. This is gloriously nerdy and I love it. I’m in 3 sim leagues and half of us do our own write ups. If this gets out of control, I know where to go for a support group.

  10. Rany Jazayerli - Apr 22, 2010 at 4:12 PM

    I must confess, I’m shocked at how well my team has done, particularly after a 1-6 start. My philosophy going into the draft was to play in the Astrodome, draft a bunch of control fly-ball pitchers, then surround them with a terrific defense. The park limits the homers; the park and the defense limits other kinds of hits; profit!
    And amazingly, it’s worked out. My team has hit just 35 homers COMBINED, but the combination of a good OBP and speed throughout the lineup has allowed me to pick up a lot of run-scoring groundouts and guys scoring from first on the fluke double. The pitching was stellar, particularly Bret Saberhagen, who had a 2.27 ERA in 301 innings(!), and Tug McGraw, who had a 2.12 ERA in 106 innings, and saved 45 of 47 games.
    I spent the last of my money to pick up Keith Hernandez with about 50 games to go, and almost immediately the team caught fire – I finished the regular season 33-12, and I’m 6-0 in the playoffs so far. This still has a 1996 Braves vibe to me, so I’m still sweating it out, but I’m happy that the ridiculous amount of time I spent preparing for this league hasn’t gone to waste.

  11. RobRob - Apr 22, 2010 at 4:53 PM

    Good God Rany! You’re going to destroy Saberhagen’s arm with that kind of pitching load!

  12. ralf - Apr 22, 2010 at 6:25 PM

    Craig, you deserve to win for one simple reason: in the year 2010, on a relatively popular website, you used the expression “Katie bar the door.” Somehow this is evidence that baseball is objectively better than football.

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