May 5, 2010, 8:36 AM EDT
As I mentioned last night, another guy jumped onto the field in Philadelphia. This guy was quite a piece of work. First, check out his Twitter page right before it happened:
“turn on the phillies game, im about to be on the feild!!!!!!!!!!”
You know what that means: his charge just went from second degree jackassary to premeditated jackassary. Not smart. I think that can get you the death penalty in some places.
Second of all, just look at the guy:
Forget the premeditated jackassary, I think you can get the death penalty for those pants alone.
Topping off his display of intellect was the fact that he had drugs on him when he jumped, resulting in a charge of narcotics possession on top of all of his trespassing/disorderly conduct stuff. Repeat: the man who planned on jumping out onto a baseball field in front of God, Chase Utley and everyone was holding. Brilliant!
Anyway, I felt kind of bad yesterday that the first jumper/taser thing led to so many people jumping on the “God, Philly fans are the worst” bandwagon. I mean, sure, there’s a history there, but the overwhelming majority of Philadelphia sports fans who aren’t idiots really don’t appreciate their whole sordid past being dragged out every time something happens.
But, man, wouldn’t it be a lot easier to look past all of that if fan idiocy didn’t continue to happen in Philly? In the past couple of weeks alone we’ve had an intentional puker and now two jerks running out onto the field. These things aren’t imaginary. They actually happened, and they probably require that the people who run Citizen Bank ballpark take a closer look at what the rabble are doing.
- Curt Schilling reveals that he was diagnosed with mouth cancer, blames smokeless tobacco 23
- Clown shoes in Chicago: the Cubs grounds crew couldn’t get the tarp on the field 38
- And That Happened: Tuesday’s scores and highlights 42
- Tony La Russa denies that Kirk Gibson’s job is safe 19
- Pirates activate Andrew McCutchen from the disabled list 2
- HBT Daily: They’ve dropped six straight, but the Pirates may be the Wild Card favorites 2
- The Diamondbacks plan to bring back Kirk Gibson for some reason 31
- And That Happened: Monday’s scores and highlights 32
- Mike Matheny addresses turmoil in Ferguson: “It’s a sad situation. It’s a tough situation for our city” (125)
- Jayson Werth clocked at 105 m.p.h. in a 55 zone, is charged with reckless driving (88)
- Here’s today’s dose of barfy Derek Jeter sentiment (82)
- Baseball is dying, you guys (78)
- A vote for Tom Werner for commissioner is a vote to return to the dark ages (78)