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Homeless man cuts across outfield in the name of beer, nachos

May 19, 2010, 2:15 PM EDT

Fun times in the minor leagues:

Authorities say a homeless who said he was looking for the fastest
route to a concession stand was arrested after walking onto the outfield
during a minor league baseball game in Pennsylvania.

Township police say they’ll file criminal trespass, disorderly conduct
and public drunkenness charges against 24-year-old Tyrone Squires over
Tuesday night’s incident. Police say Squires is from Massachusetts but
has no permanent address.

Police say Squires lowered himself
over a fence and onto the field during the bottom of the ninth inning
during an Altoona Curve game against the Akron Aeros.

(1) How can a homeless man afford ballpark concessions? Even double-A beer is like $6 a cup; and

(2) How was this man subdued without a thorough tasing? We had no idea what his intentions were until after the fact!

  1. Jason @ IIATMS - May 19, 2010 at 2:22 PM

    He’s lucky he didn’t cross Dallas Braden’s turf.

  2. Jon - May 19, 2010 at 2:30 PM

    When did “homeless” become a singular noun?
    “Look at that homeless over there!”
    Just sounds sorta…mean.

  3. Bobby - May 19, 2010 at 2:31 PM

    “Don’t tase me, bro! I don’t want to lose my buzz!”

  4. YankeesfanLen - May 19, 2010 at 2:39 PM

    Cost of living in Altoona is relatively low, and transportation is readily available at the Altoona Curve via passing freight train.

  5. JCD - May 19, 2010 at 2:56 PM

    Because Logan Township police are wusses :)

  6. Richard Dansky - May 19, 2010 at 3:13 PM

    Sounds like he’d done a couple of hits of Lincecum before hopping the fence. Mmm, tasty nachos.

  7. BC - May 19, 2010 at 3:17 PM

    Maybe he was lost. Or his GPS was on the frittz?

  8. (Not That) Tom - May 19, 2010 at 4:08 PM

    OK, so when white, privileged people do something like this it’s given a cool name like parkour and is featured prominently on MTV but a homeless brotha does it, he gets arrested. Truly a double standard.

  9. samson - May 19, 2010 at 5:16 PM

    I guess he didnt realize they quit serving beer at the top of the 8th inning!

  10. Charles Gates - May 19, 2010 at 6:42 PM

    Where did you read that Tyrone Squires is a ‘brotha?’ I read the linked article, and his race wasn’t mentioned. You can’t assume race just because his name is ‘Tyrone.’ Just look at Count Tyrone Rugen from The Princess Bride as an example. If you did more research and determined something on your own, well then, nevermind.
    If however, Mr. Squires is a ‘brotha,’ it deeply concerns me as an extraordinarily good looking white man that my brothers are subjected to more police brutality than citizens of a different racial background. I would certainly appreciate a Congressional apology regarding this matter.

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