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Two orders of Tim Lincecum, please. Extra caviar

May 19, 2010, 1:25 PM EDT

There’s a fun article in the New York Times that has almost nothing to do with baseball. Rather, it’s about how big time chefs smoke a lot of marijuana and how the stoner culture is affecting both the attitude and, in many cases, the cuisine in today’s top restaurants.  I link it here, however, because it details a new dish you can get at the Ritz-Carlton San Francisco if you’re so inclined:

To serve slow-cooked quail eggs and caviar, he places them atop plastic
film that tightly covers a white porcelain serving bowl. Then he fills
the vessel with smoke from grated Japanese cedar packed into the bowl of
a fan-driven bong he buys in the Haight-Ashbury neighborhood. The smoke
escapes when the diner lifts a small spoon covering a hole in the

He calls it the Lincecum, after Tim Lincecum, the star pitcher for the
San Francisco Giants who was arrested last fall after police found
marijuana and a pipe in his car.

Sounds fancy. I’m guessing that Lincecum is like the rest of us, however, and prefers a nice Taco Bell run after partaking.

The rest of those horrible stoners, I mean. Not the rest of “us.” Because drugs are bad, mmm-kay?

(thanks to reader, um, man, I forgot his name because I was kind of spacing, who shot me the link in the comments)

  1. Jeff Spicoli - May 19, 2010 at 1:38 PM

    That was my skull! I’m so wasted!

  2. Church of the Perpetually Outraged - May 19, 2010 at 2:12 PM

    I’ll chuckle if Tim Lincecum throws a one-hitter

    This might be your best one yet.

  3. Josh - May 19, 2010 at 2:57 PM

    This dish should be called “High Heat.”
    Man, stoners are so bad at being clever.

  4. Nico Ocho - May 19, 2010 at 6:09 PM

    Boy Craig, that was one of your funniest tags ever. Thank you.

  5. JBerardi - May 19, 2010 at 11:57 PM

    “Sounds fancy. I’m guessing that Lincecum is like the rest of us, however, and prefers a nice Taco Bell run after partaking.”

    Us? Us?! Don’t include me in your web of abuse and immorality, Craig. I never eat Taco Bell.

  6. michael standish - May 20, 2010 at 11:39 AM

    For the honey-drenched mercy of Christ, do not tell Tyrone Squires about this.

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