HBT Weekend Wrapup

All kinds of stuff happened over the weekend. Such as:

• Word leaked that the Royals were getting the 2012 All-Star Game. Should be fun assuming, you know, that whole Mayan calendar end of the world thing doesn’t go down;

• For those keeping score: when Derek Jeter tries to play hurt, he’s a “gamer.” When Alex Rodriguez tries to play hurt, he’s betraying the glorious New York Yankees and pooping on Babe Ruth’s grave;

• Proof that there is no God: Cliff Burton has been dead just a few months shorter than the time he was alive, while Ozzie Osbourne is apparently immortal;

• The Twins really, really want Mike Lowell. Which seems crazy until you realize how bad the Twins’ third basemen are;

• Rich Harden is on the DL with a strained butt. Really;

• Dice-K goes on the DL. Because of some forearm thing, though, not because of intestinal trauma or whatever caused that barfing thing the other day;

• Because Daniel Nava hit a grand slam in his first at bat as a Red Sox, he’ll become one of those Darnell McDonald/Shelley Duncan figures who the press always speak warmly of and to whom they always feel that the team isn’t a giving  a fair shake, now matter how bad they’re otherwise performing. Look for years of tweets from Red Sox beat writers like this: “Nava just signed a minor league deal with the Marlins. Good for him. Hope he latches on.”

• The courtship of Jeff Suppan has now dragged on longer than his likely tenure in St. Louis will be;

• Carlos Pena homered in his sixth straight game. Mix in a couple of singles there, Carlos, and you may get your average over the Mendoza line;

• Wait, Nava gets a shoutout from Erin Andrews simply because he’s left tickets at the will call for her a few times?  I’ve been stalking her for years and I’ve never gotten so much as a sideways glance.  OK, I may have said too much;

• Jim Joyce was named baseball’s best umpire by the players. If he blows a bunch more calls he may so popular that he can run for political office;

• Brandon Webb says he finally “sees the light at the end of the tunnel.” In other news, my train is late but I think I hear it coming;

• Colby Rasmus and Tony La Russa are no longer at odds over Rasmus consulting his father as a hitting coach. Thank God, because that boiling controversy was about ready to consume the entire 2010 Major League Baseball season;

• Stephen Strasburg came out dealing in his second start; Adam Dunn came out decking;

What a weekend!  Hang around later today for my gripping, in-person account of the Strasburg game (note: may not be gripping), the Power Rankings, and the usual brand of Monday tomfoolery, monkeyshines and shenanigans. But no funny business: we don’t tolerate that rebop around here.