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HBT Extra: The Great Vuvuzela Conspiracy

Jun 24, 2010, 9:05 AM EDT

Cliff Lee rumors, Mat Latos ruminations and the Great Vuvuzela Conspiracy of 2010. It's all in this week's edition of HBT Extra!

And when you think about it, the vuvuzelas are just as good an explanation for Fredi Gonzalez’s firing as anything Jeff Loria said yesterday.

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  1. Old Gator - Jun 24, 2010 at 9:32 AM

    Well, there goes your conspiracy theory: Larry Beinfest has revealed that the excision of Fat Freddi was decided upon after the Rangers skwashed the Feesh last week.
    .
    To be honest, though, I think the key was the two fish tanks behind the plate at Macondo Banana Massacre Stadium. In a recent comment I extrapolated from Dr. No’s revelation that his giant aquarium cost a million 1961 dollars (and isn’t it a pity that Ursula Andress ever had to age?) and determined that the Feesh’s tanks would cost $14 million freaking dollars. Now if they’re going to be spending that kind of dosh on a pair of aquariums, Scrooge McLoria had to get it back from somewhere. With the player’s union and even the league office already scanning him with baleful eyes, replacing a major league manager with a minor league manager for significantly less money was an ideal way to do it.
    .
    Hey Scrooge, here’s a great idea for you: can the idea of filling the tanks with expensive tropical fish that might someday get into the canals and spark yet another invasive species crisis. Just fill them with trout and charge the fans extra to flycast into the tanks.

  2. YankeesfanLen - Jun 24, 2010 at 9:42 AM

    I hope you have a patent pending on that innovative and state-of-the art Trade-O-Meter. Or did you just dig it up from an old NBC set from “Queen for a Day”?

  3. Jonny5 - Jun 24, 2010 at 9:46 AM

    “Just fill them with trout and charge the fans extra to flycast into the tanks. ”
    Good Idea Gator. I can only think of one team where a fan could do that without hooking everyone surrounding him.
    Craig. Your co-host is hot!! Dayyyyum. Jonny likey.

  4. Old Gator - Jun 24, 2010 at 10:14 AM

    I’m sorry, Mrs. McGillicuddy, you won’t get that lifesaving operation…but we do have two tickets for you and a friend for a dream weekend at the nearest Indian Tribe Hard Rock casino and resort.
    .
    No, I think that Craig, being a former baristo, probably copied the meter from the innocent-guilty “O.J.-O-Meter” that ran in the New York Post when said icon was on trial.
    .
    Well, where else would it have run?

  5. APBA Guy - Jun 24, 2010 at 1:32 PM

    Yeah, I’ve been on the Tiffany Simons bandwagon since Craig and she started doing this segment. I think the camera should hold on Tiffany when Craig is talking.

  6. Jonny5 - Jun 24, 2010 at 2:06 PM

    Seriously though, Craigs lips moving, or Tiffany’s lips moving? Craig just isn’t as photogenic as she is. For reasons that could fill an entire book.

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