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Quote of the day: Moe Szyslak on managing

Oct 11, 2010, 12:30 PM EST

I still think Moe's best-ever line was about how he was going to take his date out for a steak "as big as a toilet seat," but this is easily his best baseball-related line.

“The only thing I know about strategy is that whatever the manager does,
it’s wrong. Unless it works in which case he’s a button pusher.”

Moe Szyslak, bartender on the Simpsons, pretty much nailing every fan’s relationship with their team’s manager.

That came from last night’s baseball-themed episode of the “Simpsons” which, in case you missed it, Joe Posnanski recaps on painstaking detail here.

  1. Griffey's Gigantism - Oct 11, 2010 at 12:45 PM

    Moe on football:
    “Bye weeks? Bronko Nagurski didn’t get no bye weeks! And now he’s dead… Well, maybe they’re a good thing.”

  2. JBerardi - Oct 11, 2010 at 12:47 PM

    Wake me up when they do a series finale.

  3. BC - Oct 11, 2010 at 12:49 PM

    This is actually my favorite Moe quote:
    “‘Alice in Wonderland’, huh? This must be a takeoff on an ‘Alice in Underpants’ movie I saw.”
    Nothing to do with sports. Just riotous.

  4. Simon DelMonte - Oct 11, 2010 at 1:07 PM

    Wait…am I to believe that a present day Simpsons was funny? Or is it just JoPo’s enthusiasm for it?
    Either way, they will never top the show’s first baseball themed episode, featuring Wade Boggs, Don Mattingly, et al. Or the now-surreal “Or do you want to see me hit some dingers?” scene with Mark McGwire?

  5. Mr. Heyward - Oct 11, 2010 at 1:14 PM

    We’re talking softball, from Maine to San Diego
    Softball, Mattingly and Canseco.

  6. JBerardi - Oct 11, 2010 at 1:18 PM

    “It’s called playing the percentages, it’s what smart managers do to win ball games.”

    Now THAT’S a baseball management joke.

  7. Giant Space Ants - Oct 11, 2010 at 4:19 PM

    Alligators gonna alligate.

  8. Cantankerous - Oct 11, 2010 at 6:14 PM

    They actually referenced the softball episode last night because Mike Scioscia guest-starred.
    Marge: “Didn’t you get radiation poisoning at the power plant?”
    Mike Scioscia: “Yes. And it gave me super managing powers. And I de-magnetize credit cards.”

  9. schmedley - Oct 11, 2010 at 10:49 PM

    “Smithers, massage my brain.”

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