Skip to content

So what’s up with those big fat ugly necklaces everyone is wearing?

Oct 21, 2010, 4:00 PM EDT

CJ Wilson necklace

Watching the playoffs, I’ve been trying to figure out if those big necklaces a ton of the players are wearing are a fashion statement, a charity or public awareness thing or something else. ‘Duk over at Big League Stew has the whole story today. Turns out it’s snake oil. The necklaces are sold by some company promising unverifiable benefits, and they handed a bunch of these out to ballplayers who serve as free advertising.  From the product description:

“Featuring Phiten’s exclusive Aqua-Titanium technology, this product helps to promote stable energy flow throughout the body. The benefits of this are longer lasting energy, less fatigue, shortened recovery time and more relaxed muscles.”

And people still ask why players take HGH even if there’s no scientific evidence showing that it enhances performance.  Players will do anything if one guy starts doing it and doesn’t drop dead ten seconds later.  “Hey! Johnny AllStarBigSlugger started wearing that necklace last spring, and he made the All-Star team! And led the league in homers! You can’t argue with that!”

In other news, please read this comic, print it out, and keep it close by for handy reference the next time someone wants to sell you homeopathy, energy crystals, magnets, big fat necklaces or any other kind of hooey that promises to do something special for you. The only thing that stuff does is make the people who sell that stuff rich.

  1. Chris Fiorentino - Oct 21, 2010 at 4:04 PM

    Joe and Timmy talked about these the other night on the telecast. It was for Polanco I think.

  2. The Common Man/www.platoonadvantage.com - Oct 21, 2010 at 4:12 PM

    My favorite place to take first dates, back when I was in college, was The Museum of Questionable Medical Devices, in Minneapolis (because any chick that thinks that questionable medical devices is quirky and hilarious is all right in my book). The curator and owner had a phrenology machine, a device that looked like a pipe organ that supposedly could diagnose your disease (using a blood sample on a scrap of paper) using radio waves, radium pills, flashing lights that cured brain tumors, and a prostate warmer, among other things. These would fit right in. Sadly, the owner passed recently, and all of his collection went to The Science Museum of Minnesota, where they are only able to display a fraction of it. Greatest museum ever. My wife loved it.

    • ta192 - Oct 21, 2010 at 7:29 PM

      Prostate warmer? Now that sounds like something I could use…

  3. sdelmonte - Oct 21, 2010 at 4:14 PM

    What was the mouseover text? (I am chronically behind on my XKCD reading.)

    • ahamdi5 - Oct 21, 2010 at 5:40 PM

      Yep, you’re missing the punch line from the joke

      “Not to be confused with ‘making money selling this stuff to OTHER people who think it works’, which corporate accountants and actuaries have zero problems with.”

  4. The Common Man/www.platoonadvantage.com - Oct 21, 2010 at 4:21 PM

    By the way, these are not just snakeoil, but Official MLB snakeoil; as ‘Duk points out, they are embossed with the MLB logo.

    • chipmaker023 - Oct 21, 2010 at 4:41 PM

      Oh, that explains why Commissioner Selig hasn’t banned them as Performance Enhancing Bling. Sponsorships are income.

      That’s where BALCO screwed up — not paying up for an “The Official xxx Of Major League Baseball” tagline.

  5. BC - Oct 21, 2010 at 4:49 PM

    I think Josh Beckett started it. Although Turk Wendell used to wear a crazy necklace too.

    • The Dangerous Mabry - Oct 21, 2010 at 4:52 PM

      Sure, but if I recall correctly, Turk’s was made out of teeth from things he’d killed. That’s totally different, and totally hilarious.

  6. ditto65 - Oct 21, 2010 at 5:14 PM

    If I were a batter I would protest as they are distracting. Of course, I am not a batter, just some fat slob that thinks they are stupid looking.

  7. farout39 - Oct 21, 2010 at 5:43 PM

    they ought to ban anything that can be a distraction for batters. These guys look like little schoolgirls wearing those necklaces. Also make a team decision on whether to wear the pants up to show the stirrups or wear them long and dragging the ground – it looks so stupid to see guys on the same team wear different uniform pants – GO YANKS

  8. bloodysock - Oct 21, 2010 at 5:50 PM

    @ BC

    I also recall Beckett being among the first to wear these a couple of years ago. Not that it’s helped him much – certainly not this past season.

Leave Comment

You must be logged in to leave a comment. Not a member? Register now!

Featured video

Patience finally paying off for Royals fans
Top 10 MLB Player Searches
  1. R. Castillo (3386)
  2. G. Stanton (2624)
  3. A. Rizzo (2380)
  4. H. Ryu (2293)
  5. J. Hamilton (2181)
  1. M. Trout (2131)
  2. N. Arenado (2113)
  3. E. Gattis (1979)
  4. D. Ortiz (1899)
  5. A. Pujols (1856)