Incidentally, Ut, we’re having a turducken to celebrate Aboriginal Extermination Day ourselves! It’s a cuisine as rich with symbolism as the history of genocide that our self-indulgence seeks to efface. Each bird-within-a-bird represents the progressively smaller and more cramped reservation into which our native tribes were bullied. The carving represents the progressive theft of native properties and resources. The mulled wine represents the rampant alcoholism and drug abuse that replaced the cultures and traditions we destroyed. And the stuffing as a sort of demotic gesture toward what we did to these people to thank them in general for helping our otherwise clueless ancestors get a foothold here in the first place.

Okay, time to start boiling the cranberries.