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I love the smell of Yankee fan panic in the morning

Dec 15, 2010, 6:10 AM EDT

Yankee panic

… it smells like … victory:

this offseason Brian Cashman publicly bashed the face of the franchise, forced the best relief pitcher in the history of baseball to talk to Red Sox, scaled a building in Stamford, Conn., had dinner with Carl Crawford and then hours later Crawford signed with the Red Sox and now you can add letting a pitcher turn down seven years and $154 million to that list.

That comes from Neil Keefe of CBS New York. He’s saying that in a joking tone, but I think it speaks to real anxiety. Certainly the remainder of his very long hand-wringing column about the allegedly dire straits the Yankees are in and his distrust of Brian Cashman show it. And I’m sure there are Yankees fans out there who are saying similar things in 100% seriousness.

Yankeefreude has its limits — you can only get so much enjoyment from negativity after all — but I can’t say that it isn’t somewhat amusing to see fans of the Bombers have to face the kind of uncertainty about their roster that fans of every other team have had to face over the past 15 years. Welcome to being regular baseball fans, Yankee Universe. Ain’t it great?

But don’t worry. Unlike the rest of us, you’ll only have to feel it for a couple of weeks, at which time your team will make some crazy move that 25-27 other teams couldn’t due to payroll restrictions. Then, later, you can talk about how awful this all was with other Yankees fans. Sort of like the time you got lost in a bad part of town during your last trip to Paris or something. “Really, I thought I was going to die …

  1. mvd513 - Dec 15, 2010 at 6:16 AM

    Get out of Quahog you rotten Leafers!

    • phukyouk - Dec 15, 2010 at 9:44 AM


      • phukyouk - Dec 15, 2010 at 9:45 AM

        Mets Suck, Yankees suck, Knicks suck!

        Krypton sucks!

  2. Jack Marshall - Dec 15, 2010 at 7:01 AM


    Though I’m not sure the current fix is as fixable as all that. It will be interesting to see.

  3. craftylefty318 - Dec 15, 2010 at 7:55 AM

    As a Yankee fan, the ‘article’ strikes me more as hack writing than any sort of panic.

  4. Jonny 5 - Dec 15, 2010 at 8:46 AM

    Five most likely things to be uttered by Cash after hearing the Phillies were the “Mystery team”

    “Aww, what the &#$%”

    “They can’t do better than what we offered.” (long silence) Can they?

    “Quick! To the Cash Phone”

    “The Emperor will not be pleased”

    And the #1 most likely “Hank, please don’t punch me”

    • proudlycanadian - Dec 15, 2010 at 8:51 AM

      I love the smell of rotten eggs emanating from the Bronx.

    • Utley's Hair - Dec 15, 2010 at 11:19 AM

      (Hey, Jonny!!! jkay123 didn’t say anything about you commenting on here. Heeheehee…)

  5. mcsnide - Dec 15, 2010 at 8:52 AM

    What’s there to panic about? A team that won 95 games last year and returns all the key pieces missed out on a free agent so they’re suddenly awful? I don’t get it. Sure, they could use another top line starter to face those AL East lineups, but who couldn’t?

    The rumors of the Yankees’ demise seem greatly exaggerated to me.

    • aburns77 - Dec 15, 2010 at 9:09 AM

      I agree, I know people love mocking the more irrational constituencies of Yankee fans who are freaking out right now, but this is a team that wasn’t that far off from a world series last year. sure, boston has undoubtedly gotten better, but the rays have gotten much worse as well. furthermore, with the addition of jesus montero and the growth of phil hughes I think you could argue that they’re getting better, albeit not in a flashy way. this team is still very talented and deep, and while the pitching isn’t where it should be that doesn’t mean its that far off either.

    • sportsdrenched - Dec 15, 2010 at 9:21 AM

      That’s what I’m saying. They won 95 games. You know how many fan bases would love to even play meaningful games in September? Much less win 95 games?

      There a couple of Yankee fans out here in Royals Nation, and I know them well enough to know they’re not bandwagon fans. However, they are not handling the slightest bit of adveristy well. Sadly, it’s the fringe of any community that gives the entire group a bad name…[sarcasm]so I have no choice but to classify ALL Yankee Fans like these spoiled brats. [/sarcasm]

      • Jonny 5 - Dec 15, 2010 at 11:15 AM

        Don’t get all worked up about it guys. You must admit that it’s quite ironic that every attempted move made by them this offseason was messy. To have the RS get Crawford. And the Phillies of all teams to get Lee???

        I’m sorry but you’ll just have to get used to the fact that this greatly amuses every single fan of baseball who isn’t part of the Yankee Universe. This is like seeing Haley’s comet for most of us. I mean fans of NL east rivals of the Phillies are even applauding this in some cases. Don’t worry, we don’t hate you, we just find it pleasurable to finally see this happen. How often do the Yankees not get their man? Just let us have our fun without getting upset by it. Your team is still better than most, so use that thought as your “binky” if it becomes too much for you to bear.

      • Chris Fiorentino - Dec 15, 2010 at 12:51 PM


    • anotherremy - Dec 15, 2010 at 1:41 PM

      It’s not the 95 games they won in the regular season that should make you worry. it was the old and tired postseason performance of the fading Yankees. Should have let “has been” Jeter walk. Now he has to resort to cheating by pretending he was hit by the pitch to get on base and Posada followed suit. He will be an anchor on the Yankees this year. Funny that the face of the Yankees looks just like my butt. lol

      Rivera will lose it suddenly. A little at first and then Papelbon-like before the end of this season. He may need to spit on more baseballs to eek out the wildcard that Toronto just might steal from you. You have Tex, A-Roid, Cano, CC and…do I hear crickets?

      It’s not the trees, it’s the forest.

      • mcsnide - Dec 15, 2010 at 1:49 PM

        Me worry? I hope the Yankees lose 100 games. I just don’t see it. Gardner will continue to improve. They’ll be better at C than last year. Burnett can’t be any worse than he was last year. They’ve got some aging issues, sure, but I don’t foresee any great drop-off. Maybe I’m just too pessimistic.

  6. cgallaway - Dec 15, 2010 at 9:01 AM

    I would question calling Carl Crawford “the best reliever in the history of baseball”…seems a little to grandiose of a title, considering there are several in the hall of fame. The names Goose Gossage and Dennis Eckersly come to mind right away.

    • mcsnide - Dec 15, 2010 at 9:21 AM

      I, too, would not call a LF the best reliever in the history of baseball. But that’s just me.

      • phukyouk - Dec 15, 2010 at 9:48 AM


      • anotherremy - Dec 15, 2010 at 2:39 PM

        I think you are on the wrong sport. Maybe you’re thinking of Cindi Crawford. I’m with mcsnide.

    • ThatGuy - Dec 15, 2010 at 9:31 AM

      cgallaway- I would question that as well. I suppose it’s a good thing he didn’t call Carl Crawford the best reliever in baseball. There are these things called commas(,). They are used to seperate different but connecting things in sentences at times. In this case they were talking about the best reliever in baseball history, Mariano Rivera, talking to the Red Sox. Then seperatly they were talking about Carl Crawford meeting with the Yankees, then signing with the Red Sox. Reading Comprehension.

      • phukyouk - Dec 15, 2010 at 9:49 AM

        seriously… Best. Posts. Ever

    • phukyouk - Dec 15, 2010 at 9:50 AM

      but all joking aside. you left Mo out of “the best reliever ever”

      • anotherremy - Dec 15, 2010 at 2:41 PM

        Red Sox fan here….Mo is and will be “was the best closer the game has ever seen.” That’s why it was so good to get to him once in a while, especially in 2004 playoffs that made it so great. Beating the best. Besides, Mariano is a brother in the Lord and I will see him in Heaven.

    • Jonny 5 - Dec 15, 2010 at 11:17 AM

      Go back to bed! Lol!!!

      • roycethebaseballhack - Dec 15, 2010 at 12:25 PM

        Now wait just a sec..let’s not be hasty, and so readily dismiss this Carl Crawford, business.

        First off, the whole thing is too damned funny to not give it legs, and get as much mileage from it as we can.

        Second, I’ve been looking for Carl’s ERA stats, BB stats, and they’re so miniscule, they’re hard to find. Damn- I wasn’t ready for that.
        I mean, at first blush, it sounds crazy but maybe..just maybe..(blink, blink…)…maybe Carl Crawford IS the best reliever ever.

      • Jonny 5 - Dec 15, 2010 at 12:48 PM

        He does have a 0 ERA now doesn’t he?? Hmm?

      • Utley's Hair - Dec 15, 2010 at 1:09 PM

        His career ERA is lower than Jose Canseco’s isn’t it?

  7. jkay123 - Dec 15, 2010 at 9:46 AM

    A friend of mine of mine asked me last week “what do we do if we dont sign lee” and i said “we don’t sign lee” As i said yesterday on a post, this is a team that won 95 games last year with arod on the DL, posada on the DL twice, granderson on the DL, pettite out for a few months after making the all star team, tex coming off the worst season of his career, jeter coming off the worst season of his career. The yankees will be absolutely fine. They had spot starts from mitre, gaudin and dustin mosely down the stretch and still only finished 1 game behind the Rays. Burnett had the worst season of his career and even if he goes 12-8 thats a major upgrade, not to mention javy vasquez is gone and once they stretch Nova’s arm out, he has a lot of potential, he has a good fastball and knows when to throw his breaking pitches. Hughes would still be one of the youngest starters on any teams rotation and they will make a lot of sound free agency signings to bolster the pen. This isnt a team that had 80 wins last yr and are desperate to get back in the post season. The rays tailed off considerably. They lost their whole pen which was ridiculous, crawford, pena and can now pitch around longoria. Instead of battling with the rays, replace them with the sox. I dont get this panic button and some anxiety, yanks will be fine. They land feliciano, resign wood and grab balfour, its a 6 or 7 inning game. Anyone who doesnt think pettite is returning is on crack, and i wouldnt be shocked to see zambrano here. Headcase for sure, but can eat innings and win a lot here.

    • churchoftheperpetuallyoutraged - Dec 15, 2010 at 10:44 AM

      They land feliciano, resign wood and grab balfour, its a 6 or 7 inning game. Anyone who doesnt think pettite is returning is on crack, and i wouldnt be shocked to see zambrano here. Headcase for sure, but can eat innings and win a lot here.

      Wood on a better deal than his $10M last year would be a good start, but don’t expect the absurd numbers he put up last year with the Yanks. Far too many walks and a high strand rate are not indicative of future ability. Feliciano is terrible, even as a LOOGY. If they want another one, sign Randy Choate who’s been more successful for longer, and has done it in the AL E. Also, if they sign Wood, why would they need Balfour? They already have Rivera, Chamberlain, Robertson and Wood. Do they really need a 5th righty out of the pen?

      The Zambrano love is baffling to me. Tons of people are bashing Grienke for his S.A.D., and then turn around and want to sign that nutjob Zambrano? Just what the Yanks need, first time he pitches badly and gets booed at YSIII [which will happen], he then decides to punch and knock out one of his teammates. Yeah, sign me up for that…

      • Jonny 5 - Dec 15, 2010 at 12:54 PM

        I’d take one Grenkie over 3 Zambranos any day. I’ve seen…… things.

      • Utley's Hair - Dec 15, 2010 at 1:11 PM

        Imagine Zambrano going all Luke Scott in Wanker Stadium….

    • seattlej - Dec 15, 2010 at 11:53 AM

      You’re probably right in that the Yankees will be fine. But one problem with your logic is that it’s not a given that A-Rod, Jeter, Posada, Pettite, and Tex are going to bounce back in a big way or are going to be any more healthy than they were last season. These guys are starting to get old… and they haven’t necessarily been kind to their bodies. Sure, some of these guys will probably bounce back a little bit – especially Tex who is a little younger (though the three year trend does not look good) – but it’s probably just as likely that a couple of them continue to decline or miss just as much (or more) time.

  8. jkay123 - Dec 15, 2010 at 10:55 AM

    as long as he punches the braces off his girardi’s teeth.

  9. jkay123 - Dec 15, 2010 at 10:56 AM

    I mean off of his teeth.

    • Jonny 5 - Dec 15, 2010 at 12:51 PM

      hey buddy.. How are you today? I love talking Yankees. It makes me feel… Well good.

      • Chris Fiorentino - Dec 15, 2010 at 12:55 PM

        I heard Craig-y talking about this on WIP this morning and finally got a chance to read it. Snarky. Very very snarky. I am quite surprised there wasn’t a little jab at Philly fans in there, but I guess since he is so well loved on IP he is easing off us for a while.

      • mcsnide - Dec 15, 2010 at 1:06 PM

        Did you get that dude from the other day to sign off on your talking about the Yankees? Wouldn’t want to get that started again.

      • Jonny 5 - Dec 15, 2010 at 1:11 PM

        Do you have a link Chris?

      • Utley's Hair - Dec 15, 2010 at 1:26 PM

        Uh-oh, Jonny. You are such a Dark Force instigator.

  10. jkay123 - Dec 15, 2010 at 1:57 PM

    excuse me on that one, im sorry, i was too busy trying to find a way to get king felix, josh johnson and lincecum to notice you two. WHAT ARE YOUUUU GUYS DOING ON HERE?!

    and no, i wasn’t really think of a way to get them. Who is stopping any of us from saying a reliable source has the yankees calling the marlins for johnson, or king felix headed to the sox.

    • Jonny 5 - Dec 15, 2010 at 2:18 PM

      We love you man. And we will force you to love us back. One post at a time…….

      That is quite the shopping list you have there and it’s almost Christmas. Hope it’s not all “sold out” or anything…. :)

      • Utley's Hair - Dec 15, 2010 at 2:51 PM

        Forced love? Sounds um…hmm…I don’t know…

  11. jkay123 - Dec 15, 2010 at 3:56 PM

    I’M Jewish, Hannukah has passed, no dice on those guys. I’M sorry, i must admit, you two seem alright. My rant was very unlike me, I’M so used to crazy phillies, eagles and flyers fans and their aggressive behavior and put downs. See you guys in the WS, and on every yankee post.

  12. macjacmccoy - Dec 16, 2010 at 12:00 AM

    I cant tell you how much Im enjoying this my favorite past time over the past 2 days is going back and reading all the old Cliff Lee free agency stories. Reading about how team officials and even owners of the Rangers and Yankees flew all over the country to try to woo Lee into signing with there team. And all Ruben Amaro had to do is sit in his office and call Lee at the 11th hour and say you wanna come home and its over just like that.

    You know what makes it even more wonderful? Now Im reading stories that it wasnt even Amaro who iniated the call it was Lee himself who called Ruben to see if the Phillies were interested. This guy isnt a Ninja hes a friggen Jedi.

    Strong in Ruben Amaro Jr, the Force is.

    Mind Trickin the Hell out of people. He told Lee ” Come to Philly you Must” and it was all over.

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