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The clubhouse leader for ballpark concession of 2011

Dec 17, 2010, 1:47 PM EDT

Image (1) cookout.jpg for post 6410

A friend of mine once observed that there is no greater source of power in the universe than a bored Midwesterner. It leads to things like this, coming to you at the Akron Aeros ballpark next season:

In 2011, the Akron Aeros will be serving the “Three Dog Night” during each and every home game. It’s a hot dog stuffed inside a brat stuffed inside a kielbasa, placed on a hoagie roll and then slathered with sauerkraut and spicy stadium mustard.

The Aeros play exactly 116 miles from my house.  If you can’t reach me at any time next summer, you should probably assume that I’m up there ordering Three Dog Nights four at a time.

  1. jasoncollette - Dec 17, 2010 at 1:49 PM

    Joy to the World, that’s quite the item.

  2. BC - Dec 17, 2010 at 1:53 PM

    Akron is an 8-hour drive from my home just north of Hartford. I’ll meet you in line, Craig.

  3. yankeesfanlen - Dec 17, 2010 at 1:53 PM

    You’ll have plenty of gas for the way home, might be the next big idea for a GM hybrid.

  4. lampdwellr - Dec 17, 2010 at 1:59 PM

    “I have a polish sausage wrapped around my heart.”

  5. Mr. Jason "El Bravo" Heyward - Dec 17, 2010 at 2:07 PM

    Wrap that thing in bacon, coat with batter, deep fry, dip in mayo-based sauce, call it a life.

    • Bochy's Head/Timmy's Bong - Dec 17, 2010 at 3:24 PM

      If I drank Coke, little mucus-covered droplets of it would now be coating my keyboard. IOW, thanks for the laugh.

  6. Jonny 5 - Dec 17, 2010 at 2:11 PM

    I’m starving!!! Why must I be tortured with culinary excellence while I’m starving??!!!! Ugg

  7. skipperxc - Dec 17, 2010 at 2:16 PM

    Who is this friend of yours, Craig? As a bored Midwesterner, I’d love to be able to use him as a citation.

  8. Craig Calcaterra - Dec 17, 2010 at 2:17 PM

    The guy at the top of this org chart.

    http://corporate.zvents.com/company/management.html

  9. Brian - Dec 17, 2010 at 2:27 PM

    what? no phallic references? it’s no turducken.

  10. Dug - Dec 17, 2010 at 3:24 PM

    I am in Houston, TX (by force) the center of the universe for fried food and overweight people. I will drive, Craig, meet you at the game and BUY. With apologies to my mother, who was truly the worlds finest cook and chef, and who would have taken a bullet before allowing me to eat that culinary delight described above.

  11. Richard In Big D - Dec 17, 2010 at 3:33 PM

    Craig, you know where I am, and even though Dug is a little further than me, and even though this seems like the kind of thing I’d love to have in my gullett, I don’t think it’s really worth the drive. I will, however, gladly send you a pre-paid FedEx box, some zip-locs and dry ice, if you would be so kind as to purchase, package and drop some off at the nearest Kinko’s.

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