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Randy Wells committed two sins

Jan 13, 2011, 11:00 AM EDT

Randy Wells

The Cubs’ Randy Wells admits that he wasn’t focused last season:

“Last year I got caught up in a lot of stuff,” Wells said Wednesday at a Cubs Caravan luncheon at Harry Caray’s restaurant. “I maybe got too big for my britches.”
Wells likened his season to that of fictional pitcher Ricky “Wild Thing” Vaughn in the sequel of “Major League.” After a successful season in the original film, Wells said Vaughn’s character “turned into a businessman/pretty boy” in “Major League 2.”

We all lose focus sometimes, and while that’s bad for a major league pitcher, Wells should be forgiven for that.  He should never be forgiven, however, for watching and referencing “Major League 2.”  Indeed, I hope whoever is in charge of the Cubs’ kangaroo court this spring fines him severely for that.

  1. nps6724 - Jan 13, 2011 at 11:07 AM

    Major League 3 is better than 2 anyway. It’s full of great TV characters: Jefferson D’Arcy, Sam Beckett, Shane Vendrell and Curtis “Lem” Lemansky.

    • Mr. Jason "El Bravo" Heyward - Jan 13, 2011 at 11:13 AM

      ML3 is fucking terrible. Holy crap that movie is awful. My God, I feel like vomiting just thinking about it. Ugh….

      All that aside, having Vendrell and Lem in there is something I didn’t even realize. That’s pretty awesome. Damn that show was a masterpiece. Pretty much the exact opposite of ML3: Back to the….awwww, I just puked.

      • nps6724 - Jan 13, 2011 at 11:18 AM

        Carlos Liston also guest-starred on one of the episodes as Doomsday. IIRC Vic ended up handing him over to a Federale to take into Mexico and when Doomsday screamed he was an American citizen, Vic cut up his ID.

  2. Mr. Jason "El Bravo" Heyward - Jan 13, 2011 at 11:15 AM

    I find it Ludacris (that’s spelled correctly) that Wells got that mentality after proving nothing so far in his young career. That gives him the award of being the FIRST DOUCHENOZZLE OF 2011!!!! Congrats Randy “Douchenozzle” Wells!

    I think I’m gonna keep a list this year.

  3. ja4ed - Jan 13, 2011 at 11:19 AM

    I don’t know what Wells is thinking. He was just as good in 2010 as he was in 2009.
    2009 FIP – 3.88
    2010 FIP – 3.93
    If the Cubs don’t predictably banish him to the bullpen, expect a similar year in 2011.

    • sjcipinko - Jan 13, 2011 at 1:47 PM

      FIP= Fielding Independent Pitching, a measure of all those things for which a pitcher is specifically responsible. The formula is (HR*13+(BB+HBP-IBB)*3-K*2)/IP, plus a league-specific factor (usually around 3.2) to round out the number to an equivalent ERA number. FIP helps you understand how well a pitcher pitched, regardless of how well his fielders fielded.

      What a load of crap! Did you ever pitch? I did! and I watched every game Wells pitched. He was terrible. Forget the stats! Stats lie–eyes do not!

      • ja4ed - Jan 13, 2011 at 5:32 PM

        Ah, the ‘Did you ever play’ and ‘I watched every game’ arguments. Very good!

      • Bochy's Head/Timmy's Bong - Jan 14, 2011 at 12:33 PM

        Yes, those arguments are golden. I think if El Bravo wished to, he could hand out two “Douchies” in one post. sjcipinko has certainly earned one.

  4. BC - Jan 13, 2011 at 11:26 AM

    There are some movies for which sequels should never have been made. Caddyshack. Meatballs. Ghostbusters. Meet The Parents. Cannonball Run (a vastly underrated film). Major League falls in that category.
    I’m praying that the Top Gun 2 project falls through….

    • nps6724 - Jan 13, 2011 at 11:28 AM

      I think I’m the only person in the world who likes Ghostbusters 2 and both Major League sequels.

      • sdelmonte - Jan 13, 2011 at 11:34 AM

        I like Ghostbusters 2, but mainly for the sheer oddness. And maybe for Peter McNicol’s bizarre performance.

      • BC - Jan 13, 2011 at 11:42 AM

        When has Peter McNicol not been odd?

      • Reflex - Jan 13, 2011 at 8:15 PM

        I liked Ghostbuster’s 2 as well. Not as good as the first, but it was still completely watchable. Top Gun 2? Seriously? If its going to make any attempt at accuracy it’ll have to be a bunch of automated drones flying around and hot dogging it…

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