“Biesbol been berry, berry good to me.”

Maybe the Mets should find Chico.

Now obviously this is quite a ways yet from casting the ‘poon, but at least Louis may not be left to sit and blubber about the misplaced affections of his fans. Having obtained Omar Infante to bring his soft pink hands to the spaces between the bases, the Feesh now contemplate moving him to third so that they can send Matt Dominguez to AAA to learn what an incoming baseball looks like to a batter, move Infante to third (instead of handing the sack to Kindly Uncle Wes or Emilio Bonifacio) and put Louis and his stone hands back at second to kinda restore the feel of having Dan Uggla there, only swinging a toothpick instead of a club. I must admit it feels odd to see the Feesh actually contemplating the installation of a second baseman at second base – I would have thought that they’d convert a corner outfielder to play the position on two weeks’ notice – but what the hell, it’s our last season at Joeprodolsharklife Stadium, so it’s probably OK to suck and leave the place with a bad smell in September.

Meanwhile, the Teal Titans got schlonked by the ‘Stros today, Ricky Nolasco continued his tradition of generosity to the tune of seven runs, and Scrooge McLoria may be awakening from his slumber of two days’ duration from the same media vacuum where dead Cthulhu lies dreaming. And I had such high hopes for this team when camp opened. Ah well.