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Joe Biden kept the Blue Jays out of their clubhouse yesterday

Mar 24, 2011, 1:08 PM EDT

Joe Biden, Mariano Rivera

Remember how Joe Biden visited Yankees camp yesterday?  Well, apparently his arrival and all of the attendant security hoopla kept the Blue Jays from being able to get into their clubhouse, and they had to wait patiently behind security until they could do so.

I assume this means that Canada will declare war on us soon.

Back in 1989 my dad worked in an office that overlooked the tarmac at the airport in Beckley, West Virgina. Dan Quayle used to take his family on whitewater rafting trips on the New River once a year, and it was the first time he had done it as VP. The Secret Service flew in a week before in a C-130 cargo plane, unloaded black Chevy Suburbans and interrogated every employee in the airport to make sure they didn’t represent a security threat.

I always thought that was a bit much. I mean, really, Quayle? Anyone ever take a shot at a vice president? I mean, other than Aaron Burr?

  1. cur68 - Mar 24, 2011 at 1:18 PM

    I am assembling the rabid beavers as I type. Why was this not reported yesterday so I could have begun the march on washington today? The delay has cost me valuable wood gathering time. Biden will pay…

    • Utley's Hair - Mar 24, 2011 at 1:33 PM

      Hehhehheh…he said wood gathering…hehhehheh

      • cur68 - Mar 24, 2011 at 1:33 PM

        Shut up Beavis!

      • hasbeen5 - Mar 24, 2011 at 1:41 PM

        And “beaver”

    • Utley's Hair - Mar 24, 2011 at 1:38 PM

      Actually, I amend my statement to say OUCH!!!! Rabid beavers gathering wood? WTF, you mean-spirited booger eating Canadian cellar dweller you!!!!

      • cur68 - Mar 24, 2011 at 1:40 PM

        I resent that. How dare you call us cellar dwellers! It’s a very tastefully appointed basement, thank you very much.

      • Utley's Hair - Mar 24, 2011 at 1:47 PM

        At least you admit to being Canadian.

    • proudlycanadian - Mar 24, 2011 at 3:51 PM

      We have already attacked you with Celine Dion and Justin Bieber. Next, we are going to infest Central Park with real beavers. TIMBER!!!!!!!!

      • Utley's Hair - Mar 24, 2011 at 8:41 PM

        Celine Dion and Justin Bieber? So you resort to biological warfare right off the bat? Not cool, Canucks!!!!!!

        And infesting Central Park with beavers? Meh.
        1.) It’s in New York.
        2.) There are already plenty of beavers around there—they just cost money. And some of them would give you something more nasty than a bucktooth bite.

      • cur68 - Mar 24, 2011 at 10:04 PM

        You’d pay good money for true piece of Canadian beaver, admit it. When Central Park sees what’s coming their way, New York will surrender Biden and 3 first round draft picks. If not, then our beavers will chew your wood…or something.

      • Utley's Hair - Mar 24, 2011 at 11:21 PM

        By “good money,” you mean non-Canadian money, right? Bwahaha!!!!

        And, by a good piece of Canadian beaver, are you referring to beaver steak? (Marinated in Labatt’s?) You’re not referring something akin to that misleading knockoff on bacon, right?

      • cur68 - Mar 24, 2011 at 11:34 PM

        Not so fast chuckles; the exchange rate is $1.03 American for every 1 beaver buck. So when I say good money I do indeed mean the currency currently valued at 3% more than yours. And do not impugn our bacon, sir. Our pork is more porky than your pork. Or something. Oh, and stop marinating the beavers in Labatts; that stuff’s piss. Only tourists and Quebecers drink it. Out west here we drink Big Rock. You’d sell your kidneys for a peace of our beaver, too.

  2. WhenMattStairsIsKing - Mar 24, 2011 at 1:21 PM

    Someone could have really had it in for anyone who couldn’t spell.

  3. BC - Mar 24, 2011 at 1:24 PM

    Re: a shot at the veep – Well, maybe Cheney was shooting in self defense….

    • Utley's Hair - Mar 24, 2011 at 1:32 PM

      Preemptive self defense.

  4. Jonny 5 - Mar 24, 2011 at 1:34 PM

    Biden is a bad man…..

  5. steve keane - Mar 24, 2011 at 1:34 PM

    I bet they were in the trainers room searching for Tylenol 222′s

  6. Utley's Hair - Mar 24, 2011 at 1:36 PM

    Craig, if you’re referring to Alexander Hamilton, he didn’t actually shoot at Burr, he shot away from him.

    • steve keane - Mar 24, 2011 at 3:07 PM

      not only that but Alexander Hamilton founded the NY Post too bad he didn’t get knocked off before that

  7. merkleboner - Mar 24, 2011 at 2:13 PM

    Yeah Craig, you’re getting your history mixed up a bit. Hamilton shot at VP Aaron Burr.

    • merkleboner - Mar 24, 2011 at 2:14 PM

      nevermind

  8. bobwsc - Mar 24, 2011 at 3:49 PM

    that hat looks tight – hopefully it isn’t pulling Joe’s plugs out.

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