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Great Moments in Cliff Lee Love

Mar 30, 2011, 3:05 PM EDT

Cliff Lee phillies throwing

Apparently ladies love cool Cliff:

Cliff Lee love isn’t about box scores, ERAs, or innings pitched. You won’t understand it by dissecting interview transcripts, psychoanalyzing his heart, or rereading the fine print of the leaner contract he signed with Philadelphia at the expense of a fatter paycheck dangled by the Yankees.

It is about animal instinct. It is about being a Marlboro Man in a Metrosexual World. And it begins and ends with Game 1 of the 2009 World Series, when in one of those rare moments of superhero shine, a less-is-more ace incinerated the almighty Yankees the way Indiana Jones crushed the Germans with little more than a whip, a sneer, and a few good Hollywood one-liners.

…Watching Lee’s no-drama dominance that night, women across this cubicle-cluttered, iPhone-armed nation of pale-faced dot-comers and overpaid Wall Street slicksters were wondering: They still make men like that?

Sure enough, as Beckner handed us menus she shared a final thought about Lee and that World Series game, and she served it up with naughty relish: “I wanted to do all sorts of things to that man.”

I was going to mock this reaction to Lee as the silly and superficial ravings of a troubled woman, but than I realized that most of the male Phillies fans who read this blog reacted in more or less the same way when Ruben Amaro signed him this winter.

(thanks to Jonny for the heads up)

  1. Mr. Jason "El Bravo" Heyward - Mar 30, 2011 at 3:22 PM

    J5, UH and co. will be happy to know he was my second pick in the fantasy draft. So I’m rooting for the Phillies every fifth day! Kind of…but really, suck it Philly.

    • Jonny 5 - Mar 30, 2011 at 3:37 PM

      That’s my single reason for swearing off fantasy baseball.

      BTW GO FLYERS!!!

      • Mr. Jason "El Bravo" Heyward - Mar 30, 2011 at 3:38 PM


        What’s wrong, scared of conflicting interests?

      • Jonny 5 - Mar 30, 2011 at 4:04 PM

        Not afraid of a conflict, but more of a “I don’t ever want to root for an opponent of the Phills because of my fantasy team.” It would make me feel dirty I think..

        BTW the Bulls can’t figure out the Sixers yet can they?? Hahahaha!!!

      • Utley's Hair - Mar 30, 2011 at 4:22 PM

        And…uh…howzabout dem dare Sixers over DA Bools? So, suck it Chi Town—especially Braves fans in the general Downwind area of the Windy City.

    • Utley's Hair - Mar 30, 2011 at 4:18 PM

      Let me guess who your first pick was….

    • Utley's Hair - Mar 30, 2011 at 4:29 PM

      Your first pick was…Felix Pie!!!! No, wait…Luke Scott!!!!! Hmmm….

  2. sabathiawouldbegoodattheeighthtoo - Mar 30, 2011 at 3:23 PM

    Did you hear Cliff’s reaction?

    “The New York skanks can do anything at any moment to improve and they’re not afraid to go do things. That was part of the decision-making process, too, but I felt like with what the Boston skanks had done and it seems like some of the New York skanks are getting older, but I liked the Texas skanks.”

  3. steveflack - Mar 30, 2011 at 3:41 PM

    If Philly loved him so much, why’d they trade him to Seattle?

    • Mr. Jason "El Bravo" Heyward - Mar 30, 2011 at 3:52 PM

      To get the better Roy Halladay. Now they have both and the world will end.

      • Utley's Hair - Mar 30, 2011 at 4:26 PM

        Have I told you MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!

      • Jonny 5 - Mar 30, 2011 at 4:34 PM

        That’s how I feel UT. MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

      • Utley's Hair - Mar 30, 2011 at 5:09 PM

        Hey, Heyward!!!! GO FLYERS!!!!! And as of Friday, GO PHIGHTINS!!!!!!!!!

    • Jonny 5 - Mar 30, 2011 at 4:06 PM

      The fans didn’t trade crap!!! oh sorry. I get excited this time of season, err year I mean.

    • Utley's Hair - Mar 30, 2011 at 4:25 PM

      Tough love. You see, if you love somebody, you need to set them free…free, free…set them free….

  4. The Dangerous Mabry - Mar 30, 2011 at 5:00 PM

    So which sorts of things did the ladies want to do to him during his 0-2, 6.94 World Series last year? I imagine they were a different sort of thing.

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