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Orlando Cabrera becomes a U.S. citizen

May 20, 2011, 5:05 PM EDT

Cabrera_Orlando

If you were wondering why Orlando Cabrera wasn’t the one taking that sweet throw from Asdrubal Cabrera in the highlight from last night, it’s because he left the Indians yesterday to go to South Carolina where he is being naturalized as a U.S. citizen. Which is cool, though I’m not sure why it has to happen in South Carolina. Red tape.

As the article notes, you have to take a test on American history and civics to become a citizen.  When I was in New York a few weeks ago, I was killing time at an airport newsstand where one employee was quizzing the other on the citizenship test. The woman answering the questions got every one right and was clearly set to ace it.  I bet there are a huge number of Americans who would fail it miserably.

Kind of makes me wish that they gave it to the folks born here. If you fail you get exiled to a ship floating in international waters for an intensive study session and they you take it again.  Fail it three times, you gotta work on the ship. The best part: the people sent to the ship will, by definition, be too dumb to realize that the whole setup is unconstitutional. Foolproof, I tells ya!

  1. goldensombrero3000 - May 20, 2011 at 5:54 PM

    Orlando Cabrera is one of my favorite baseball players. I think he should be a manager someday. Every team he’s on wins the division.

  2. Brian Murphy - May 20, 2011 at 6:36 PM

    Spurred on this post, I decided to do a quick 100-question U.S. citizenship sample test.

    I got 94 out of 100. I’m not sure if I should feel good about that.

  3. goldensombrero3000 - May 21, 2011 at 5:20 AM

    I remember watching a Reds game where he was on the DL but he was the dugout ballboy for the game. He had a non-flap helmet on and collected bats and delivered baseballs to the umpire. Everyone loves Olrando Cabrera.

  4. natstowngreg - May 21, 2011 at 8:27 AM

    Bureaucracies have their reasons. Sometimes, they aren’t good reasons.

    Congratulations, Orlando.

  5. bigtrav425 - May 21, 2011 at 10:23 AM

    Whaaaat?!?!…this is very disturbing!…anyone NOT a U.S Citizen should not have a job in the US period.End of Statement

    • dwishinsky - May 21, 2011 at 11:47 AM

      … and you are a BASEBALL fan? Doesn’t leave you too many teams (or any) to root for if your “rule” goes into place.

      I am an immigrant to this country (granted from Canada which I realize to many barely even counts) but it is a costly and time-consuming process. If more natural born Americans understood the struggles you go through to be able to be a part of this great country they wouldn’t make asinine comments such as yours.

    • Reflex - May 22, 2011 at 7:08 AM

      Should US citizens living abroad be fired from their jobs too? Should I not be permitted to get a job anywhere but the US? Seems kind of silly since people work all around the world regardless of their nationality.

      I work with a lot of non-US citizens. They are for the most part wonderful people.

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