Jun 2, 2011, 8:25 AM EDT
I didn’t watch the Stanley Cup Final, but people tell me I should have because it would have turned me into a hockey fan. I dunno. I enjoy going to a game now and again, but the hockey ship sailed for me years ago and there’s probably no hope for me now. But I was told that it was exciting, so this is one of the rare instances in which you are excused if you didn’t pay attention to baseball last night. For those of you in that boat, here’s what you missed:
- If the season ended today, well, we’d be quite surprised and season ticket holders would feel ripped off. But at least we’d know who the rookie of the year was.
- Now witness the firepower of this fully ARMED and OPERATIONAL Andrew Bailey!
- Meanwhile, Aroldis Chapman still has some work to be done. There’s a magnetic field down on the forest moon below him providing him protection, however. But don’t worry; the facility housing the shield generator is being guarded by a few dozen elite troops who can’t be defeated by a handful of teddy bears or anything.
- Chan Ho Park is not having a good go of it in Japan.
- The Diamondbacks and Royals made a trade.
- Jim Thome strained a quad.
- Daisuke Matsuzaka is going to have Tommy John surgery. Recovery usually takes 12-14 months. Dice-K will probably take 18 because that’s just how he rolls.
- That’s the night that the lights went out in St. Louis. That’s the night that they hung an innocent man. Don’t trust your soul to no backwoods southern lawyer. Cause the judge in the town’s got bloodstains on his hands.
- The Angels’ plane makes an emergency landing. Hey, you know what they say: see a broad to get dat booty yak ’em… leg ‘er down a smack ’em yak ’em!
Now, let us begin our day, shall we?
- Monday’s White Sox/Orioles game postponed due to ongoing protests and violence in Baltimore 88
- Cardinals confirm Adam Wainwright is done for season with torn Achilles 15
- Source: Josh Hamilton rejected a trade to a National League team because he wanted to go back to Texas 35
- Deal done: Josh Hamilton traded to the Texas Rangers for cash considerations 40
- Pitchers batting is dumb and the DH should be universal 350
- And That Happened: Sunday’s scores and highlights 88
- Alex Rodriguez hits 659th career home run, now one shy of tying Willie Mays 60
- Max Scherzer doubtful for next start due to thumb injury 5
- Pitchers batting is dumb and the DH should be universal (351)
- Comment of the Day: do not underestimate the seriousness of the anti-DH crowd (190)
- The early leaders in MLB’s “Franchise Four” thing have been announced (166)
- The Royals and White Sox had a benches-clearing fracas, five players ejected (161)
- Protesters converge on Oriole Park at Camden Yards (149)