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And That Happened: Classic!

Jul 14, 2011, 5:30 AM EDT

Ruth Called Shot Baseball

Note: due to the All-Star break, we now bring you a special “Classic” version of “And That Happened.” The following originally ran on July 14, 1932

Yankees 5, Browns 3: A home run for Babe Ruth, his 25th on the season. Ruth is the power-hitting sensation the sport desperately needs these days. Let’s hope he’s clean. Sorry, but even in this Prohibition era, it’s impossible not to be suspicious when someone continues to show up to the ballpark in last night’s clothes, reeking of gin, cigar smoke and the scent of loose women. Ruth is a great story. Let’s just hope he’s legit.

Senators 15, White Sox 4: The game was delayed some two hours, as the city’s streets had to be cleared for Army Chief of Staff General Douglas MacArthur, as he and two cavalry units marched to clear the Bonus Army off the Anacostia Flats. When the dead and injured were removed, it was a wonderful day for a ballgame. Heinie Manush had a triple, four RBI and an assault beef, after he socked two wiseacres for laughing at the name “Heine.”

Dodgers 5, Cubs 4: This game was delayed as well. Hobos. Hobos as far as the eye could see. Happens so often anymore, however, that none of the players seemed too upset by it all.  At any rate, after the hobos were rounded up and placed on a westbound freight, play resumed.  Only problem: the Dodgers’ starter — Sloppy Thurston — was himself mistaken for a hobo, likely due to his name. This led to a longer delay. Eventually Sloppy was returned.

Phillies 3, Reds 2: I was going to take the train down to Cincinnati for this one, but I had another engagement. There was a meeting of the  Women’s Organization for National Prohibition Reform here in Arch City, and I for one would never pass up the opportunity to meet Ms. Pauline Sabin, who (a) is single and; (b) is doing God’s work. Snipe Hansen and Pinky Whitney were the heroes of this one for the Phillies. Which isn’t surprising, because when you think of a hero, you can’t help but think of Snipe and Pinky.

Braves 5, Pirates 1; Braves 10, Pirates 5: This doubleheader was not entirely necessary. Boston has been visiting Pittsburgh for several days now and could very well have completed this series in single games. It was deemed appropriate by President Hoover, however, that in light of the current economic strife, that the clubs stimulate the economy with concentrated economic activity like this whenever possible. “Some may construe mild suggestions to the private sector such as these to be a brand of socialism,” President Hoover said, “and I am not unaware of the danger of this level of governmental meddling in private affairs.  But desperate times call for desperate measures, and if the very meek entreaties of a sitting President to our nation’s evil, bloated plutocrats has even the slightest hope of helping matters, I am willing to risk the potentially destabilizing side effects that this intervention might cause.”

Cardinals 6, Giants 2: after 30 years with John McGraw at the helm, the Giants are still adjusting to new manager Bill Terry following McGraw’s retirement a little over a month ago. Winning games without constantly baiting the other team, the umpires and the fans into horrendous donnybrooks is not part of the Giants’ makeup, so it will certainly take time to adjust.

Red Sox 8, Tigers 2: The Red Sox’ win — the second in a two-game winning streak! — brings them to within 36 games of first place. This win was nice, but it’s just sad to see a team from a town as small as Boston trying to compete with the big boys from up-and-coming juggernaut cities like Detroit.

Indians 7, Athletics 5: Three days after the ridiculous game in which Eddie Rommel gave up 29 hits — and won — and in which Johnny Burnett went 9-for-11 — and lost — the Indians and Athletics play a relatively tame one. Lefty Grove takes the loss in a relief role. I say, the man just simply doesn’t know how to win baseball games.

  1. skerney - Jul 14, 2011 at 5:38 AM

    That Ruth was the best pitcher I ever saws, I tell ya. If I ever meet that goodfernuthin’ that traded him to The Yanks, I’ll give him the ole’ what for!

  2. Ryan Lansing - Jul 14, 2011 at 6:15 AM

    I don’t even know where to start. Best HBT (or CTB) article ever. I’m sure you’ve worked much harder on more relevant-to-current-events stuff, Craig, but this is awesome.

    • Old Gator - Jul 14, 2011 at 7:34 AM

      Don’t discount the substantial contribution Craig’s insomnia made to this edition.

      Or all that bourbon he’s been snorting.

      By the way, “clean” in Ruth’s case refers to the crabs.

  3. phukyouk - Jul 14, 2011 at 6:44 AM

    I lold!

    • Old Gator - Jul 14, 2011 at 7:34 AM

      I Zod.

      • mentalotherhalf - Jul 14, 2011 at 4:55 PM

        Izod.

  4. sdelmonte - Jul 14, 2011 at 7:02 AM

    History nerd that I am, I went to read up afterwards about the Bonus Army. What a shameful episode in our history.

    • Ryan Lansing - Jul 14, 2011 at 7:14 AM

      Shameful, but not too dissimilar to recent attempts to reduce VA funding while increasing the number of dollars making their way to defense contractors.

      This is a pretty awesome read, written by one of the main characters of the Bonus Army fiasco: http://www.ratical.org/ratville/CAH/warisaracket.html

      • sdelmonte - Jul 14, 2011 at 9:01 AM

        The thing that gets me, though, is the role played by MacArthur, and how he wasn’t as tarnished as he should have been. Heroic WWII general or not, he was culpable of some pretty terrible things here, and no one remembers it.

      • yankeesfanlen - Jul 14, 2011 at 9:05 AM

        MacArthur was a snot, thourgh and through, his entire career.

    • Old Gator - Jul 14, 2011 at 7:39 AM

      You could think of it as America’s Tiananmen Square, couldn’t you?

    • natstowngreg - Jul 14, 2011 at 1:28 PM

      I highly recommend Dickson & Allen’s book on the Bonus Army (see the Wiki page linked in Craig’s post). Lengthy but fascinating story of how the Bonus Army started, how it lived in Washington, and how politicians and the military dealt with it.

      Come to think of it, the person who borrowed my copy several years ago never returned it. hmmmph!

  5. ditto65 - Jul 14, 2011 at 7:14 AM

    “Hobos. Hobos as far as the eye could see.”

    I have nothing to add that could make that line better. Pure gold.

    • Old Gator - Jul 14, 2011 at 7:41 AM

      That’s nothing. Wait till the last unemployment checks run out later this year and the Tea Party blocks any attempt to extend them.

      • Craig Calcaterra - Jul 14, 2011 at 9:03 AM

        ED NOTE: There was some back and forth here which led to OG’s comment being altered slightly, at the request of another commenter and with OG’s consent. I could have just gotten rid of it all or, alternatively, just scrubbed the word he wanted removed and left the initial criticism, but I figured this was cleanest since there was consensus on the matter.

        Also, I want to see what people say to his Tea Party comment, so that needed to be left untouched.

      • Old Gator - Jul 14, 2011 at 9:08 AM

        Thanks Craig. I want to repeat my apology to tigerprez here to make sure that he sees it. It was an unthinking and insensitive comment and I lushly deserved his rebuke.

      • Jonny 5 - Jul 14, 2011 at 9:58 AM

        “We don’t have a trillion-dollar debt because we haven’t taxed enough; we have a trillion-dollar debt because we spend too much.”

  6. halladaysbiceps - Jul 14, 2011 at 7:48 AM

    I just woke up. Am I in a nightmare? It’s 1932? How is this possible? How is my internet still working? Am I in the Twilight Zone? I’m waiting to see Rod Serling to walk through the door and start talking to me.

    • sdelmonte - Jul 14, 2011 at 9:01 AM

      “Must warn the world about Hitler. And get some ice cream.”

      • halladaysbiceps - Jul 14, 2011 at 9:18 AM

        Ice cream sounds good, But Prohibition is still going on in this year of 1932. I’m starting to get the shakes at the thought of it. Please, Rod Serling, let me out of this nightmare!

      • yankeesfanlen - Jul 14, 2011 at 9:37 AM

        biceps- Get the ice cream anyway. It’s what kept the breweries alive during this period of misguidance.

      • cur68 - Jul 14, 2011 at 11:27 AM

        No worries HB; a clipper ship will be sneaking over your border with some of Beaverland’s finest. I’m told the blindness is temporary.

      • Utley's Hair - Jul 14, 2011 at 11:42 AM

        I had to say it: The blindness may be temporary, but the hairy…oh, hell, never mind.

      • cur68 - Jul 14, 2011 at 1:07 PM

        This is why the Canadian National Institute for the Blind is world famous, you know.

  7. heynerdlinger - Jul 14, 2011 at 8:15 AM

    “Tramps and hobos are commonly lumped together, but in their own sight they are sharply differentiated. A hobo or bo is simply a migratory laborer; he may take some longish holidays, but soon or late he returns to work. A tramp never works if it can be avoided; he simply travels. Lower than either is the bum, who neither works nor travels, save when impelled to motion by the police.”

    -H.L. Mencken

    • yankeesfanlen - Jul 14, 2011 at 8:40 AM

      They don’t have reporters like that in Baltimore anymore, by crackie!

      • Old Gator - Jul 14, 2011 at 9:10 AM

        Makes you want to run to the living room and put Inherit the Wind on to watch Gene Kelly play him again, don’t it?

      • yankeesfanlen - Jul 14, 2011 at 9:28 AM

        I most admire the Spencer Tracy part. Gene Kelly always chewed the scenery too much more my taste, and he did it this time without a drawn out useless “modern dance” scene. And of course anyone can do a William Jennings Bryan, given a quart of gin, which is paradoxical in itself.

      • Old Gator - Jul 14, 2011 at 11:45 AM

        No one chewed scenery like H. L. Menken. When he was in new York he always went to Luchows for lunch and I hear tell that when he had annihilated his schnitzel, red cabbage and spaetzel he started gnawing on the wainscoting and wallpaper. He was loud, brassy and outrageous as a writer as well as a party animal. Kelly nailed him.

        And come on – Fredrick March was brilliant.

        But whose idea was Dick York when you could have had Montgomery Clift?

      • yankeesfanlen - Jul 14, 2011 at 1:04 PM

        OG – Dick York could not act his way out of a paper bag in “Bewitched”. But Montgomery Clift was so cloying Spencer Tracy would have ad-libbed a punch to the jaw. Maybe Paul Newman had the range to do it.Idealistic with an edge.

  8. Matthew Flint - Jul 14, 2011 at 8:36 AM

    Happy Birthday, Craig!

  9. yankeesfanlen - Jul 14, 2011 at 8:43 AM

    Have no doubt that you’d much rather meet Pauline Sabin than Sarah Palin.

    • Old Gator - Jul 14, 2011 at 11:47 AM

      Ugh. I wouldn’t use Sarah Palin for bait if I were shark fishing.

      • yankeesfanlen - Jul 14, 2011 at 1:19 PM

        Therein lies the point, Gate. Sabin was tough for her own intellectual causes and became disillusioned when Prohibition proved a failure and politicians (Hoover) crossed.her. An “active citizen” as opposed to a less-then-shark- bait politician.

      • Utley's Hair - Jul 14, 2011 at 1:38 PM

        Shatk Bait, Shark Bait, oo-ha-ha….

      • Utley's Hair - Jul 14, 2011 at 3:08 PM

        (To anybody without kids, that is a reference to a scene in Finding Nemo. :( )

  10. jjjjshabado - Jul 14, 2011 at 8:44 AM

    So I guess Julio Franco got the night off?

  11. phukyouk - Jul 14, 2011 at 8:52 AM

    I am giving 1000:1 Odds that the Yanks win the World series. IN FACT i will give better odds that it happens in a four game sweep of the Cubs.

  12. adenzeno - Jul 14, 2011 at 9:00 AM

    This was great! Thank you.

  13. frankvzappa - Jul 14, 2011 at 9:07 AM

    WOW, a president that was “not unaware of the danger of this level of governmental meddling in private affairs.” That’s rich.

    On that note, I’m gonna go buy 5,000 light bulbs.

  14. yankeesfanlen - Jul 14, 2011 at 9:14 AM

    I like seeing the old baseball nicknames (or the archaic names themselves). Just trying to preserve some baseball history here, right Beep-beep, Grumpy, and THE FAT TOAD? [feels go to write that again]

    • sportsdrenched - Jul 14, 2011 at 11:01 AM

      I commented about this in some thread yesterday. We need a nick name renissance in sports, but I’m sure PC pressure would eliminate any good ones.

    • Jonny 5 - Jul 14, 2011 at 11:12 AM

      Well you have your a- rod, and we have our big piece and flyin’ Hawaiian…. You Yankees fans need to come up with a good one for CC. Like Smokey the bear or something….

      • cur68 - Jul 14, 2011 at 11:36 AM

        CC = Coco Puffs OR Count Chocula, both of which, if I recall from his BSOL spring training interviews, were responsible for his ‘full figure’. Only fitting he carry the name around with him.

      • natstowngreg - Jul 14, 2011 at 1:23 PM

        Coco Crisp, part of a balanced breakfast.

      • phukyouk - Jul 14, 2011 at 1:27 PM

        it was actually Captain Crunch

      • Jonny 5 - Jul 14, 2011 at 1:35 PM

        The colossal caster ?

  15. umrguy42 - Jul 14, 2011 at 9:37 AM

    I “heard” this in one of those classic “old-timey” voices (especially the line about hobos) :p

    • jimbo1949 - Jul 14, 2011 at 12:58 PM

      Walter Winchell?

  16. sjhaack - Jul 14, 2011 at 10:48 AM

    Lefty Grove has 150 victories, he’s a winner if I’ve ever seen one. That snide remark is nothing but crass and pot-stirring. This paper is a sham, and the writer is a cad. A cad I tell you!

  17. APBA Guy - Jul 14, 2011 at 12:03 PM

    I predict that someday baseball will move to the West Coast. Nobody knows when, nobody knows which teams. But when it happens, there will be much gnashing of teeth and complaints from the East that box scores are days late in arriving. Fans whose teams have moved will swear oaths of vengeance and drink, often to excess, to the demise of their former heroes. Owners will complain loudly of the costs of travelling to play teams on the wrong side of the Rockies. And reporters will grumble as their sources depart, forcing them to invent new rivalries and conflicts for their stories.

    But move they will for one reason: money. The chance to be “the only game in town” will prove too irresistible. Fans will pack beautiful new stadiums to see their heroes battle against the Old World teams from the East in the perfect West Coast weather. Some will call it a golden age.

    • jimbo1949 - Jul 14, 2011 at 12:58 PM

      ah yes, Oakland. There was no there, there, until Charlie O arrived in ’68.

  18. foreverchipper10 - Jul 14, 2011 at 12:07 PM

    All this prohibition talk is getting me excited for the new season of “Boardwalk Empire.”

    • Utley's Hair - Jul 14, 2011 at 1:36 PM

      All this Prohibition talk makes me want a drink.

  19. The Common Man - Jul 14, 2011 at 1:53 PM

    As much as I normally love And That Happened… the day after the All Star Game is my favorite And That Happened every year. Well done, Craig.

  20. kiwicricket - Jul 14, 2011 at 9:32 PM

    Tremendous work Mr C.
    Wish I turned up in last night’s clothes, reeking of gin, cigar smoke and the scent of loose women.

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