Jul 26, 2011, 3:29 PM EDT
Look, I know everyone who isn’t me has their juices flowing this week because football — the handsome yet drunken and occasionally abusive boyfriend of professional sports — is back and that you’re all gonna try hard to make it work this time. And I’m happy for all of you, I really am. But could you do me one small favor and not import football terms into baseball in honor of its return? This is what got me, from the Twitter feed of Jon Heyman:
hearing [the Giants] are showing strong interest in bj upton. hes “shutdown cf” who fits their big park.
I totally understand what he’s getting at here. And I suppose that clarity of intent the only real rule when it comes to coining new terms. But please, let me have this Jon. Let me have a space in baseball where football does not intrude. More broadly, let us remember that, when it comes to the eight position players on the field, describing a guy in a single-dimension does not work as well as doing so for a football player, where specialization is the order of the day rather than the exception.
Anyway, my sanity needs this very badly. Thank you for your consideration in this regard.
- Dodgers are already fed up with 6.56 ERA-pitching, excuse-making Mat Latos 4
- And That Happened: Thursday’s scores and highlights 45
- Bryce Harper walks in all four of his plate appearances, scores four runs 21
- ESPN pulls Curt Schilling off broadcasts for rest of regular season and Wild Card game 129
- David Ortiz is more likely to be boned in Hall of Fame voting for being a DH than for PED stuff 130
- And That Happened: Wednesday’s scores and highlights 74
- The Marlins are going to change everything except their biggest problem this offseason 53
- Drooling over Miguel Sano’s incredible numbers through 50 career games 36
- Sarah Palin sticks up for Curt Schilling, tells ESPN to “stick to sports” (266)
- David Ortiz is more likely to be boned in Hall of Fame voting for being a DH than for PED stuff (130)
- ESPN pulls Curt Schilling off broadcasts for rest of regular season and Wild Card game (129)
- Matt Williams puts up another strong performance in his quest to get himself fired (105)
- David Ortiz tweets his happiness about the Deflategate decision (100)