Jul 29, 2011, 9:40 AM EDT
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly, but I don’t know why she swallowed the fly. I guess she’ll die:
For years, the San Francisco Giants’ regular seagulls cooperated so nicely: They flocked to AT&T Park after the final out to scavenge for treats like leftover popcorn, pizza or garlic fries.
Those gulls have become more pesky and plentiful of late, creating a problem for fans during games on occasion this season. So, now, the Giants are considering bringing in a resident falcon to help fend off the birds and keep them at bay out where they belong – above the bay.
This happens at a ballpark or two every year. And while I understand how nature works, I do always find it funny that the solution to a pest is to invite a killer bird of prey into a building with 40,000 people in it every day.
And as a result of watching way too many bad movies in my youth, I always wonder (hope?) that the falcon will develop a taste for human flesh and turn on its keepers and the fans at large. They then bring in some old shaman-type stock character (played by a fading actor who made a couple of decent movies in the 70s but is now down on his luck) who claims to know the ways of the Falcon,* and he too is eaten. As is always the case, the day is saved by some plucky teenagers.
*Note: “Ways of the Falcon” would be an excellent title for this direct-to-video feature.
- Settling the Scores: Saturday’s results 0
- Lucas Duda’s last eight hits have been home runs 8
- Report: Larry Lucchino stepping down as president and CEO of the Red Sox 28
- Clayton Kershaw blanks the Angels over eight innings, runs consecutive scoreless innings streak to 37 19
- Clayton Kershaw and Mike Trout make MLB history in Saturday’s matchup 13
- Matt Williams on Bryce Harper’s ejection: “He needs to stay in the baseball game” 42
- UPDATE: C.J. Wilson needs elbow surgery and will likely miss the rest of the season 14
- Settling the Score: Friday’s results 45
- The benches cleared in Friday’s Giants-Rangers game (188)
- Blue Jays acquire David Price from the Tigers (112)
- Rangers land ace left-hander Cole Hamels from Phillies (106)
- Royals make another big move, get Ben Zobrist from A’s (95)
- Report: Rockies trade Troy Tulowitzki to Blue Jays for Jose Reyes and prospects (92)