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And That Happened: Wednesday’s scores and highlights

Sep 8, 2011, 6:01 AM EDT

Kansas City Royals v Oakland Athletics Getty Images

Athletics 7, Royals 0:  Guillermo Moscoso took a no-hitter into the eighth inning . He allowed only two hits in all in eight and two-thirds and, between his last start against the Mariners and this one against the Royals, retired 30 batters in a row. Heck, if a hitting streak can stretch between two seasons, I’d say we can give Moscoso a perfect game for that, right?

Mets 1, Marlins 0: In an unexpected turn of events, Dickey beat Hand.  Oh please. Like you haven’t been waiting for that one all year.

Rays 5, Rangers 4: A walkoff homer for Desmond Jennings in the bottom of the 10th. The Rays are eight seven back of the Red Sox for the wild card and start a three-game series against them on Friday. Funny that people will talk about the AL Central “race” or the NL Central “race,” when each of those have wider deficits than this wild card thing and no one — really no one — talks about the Rays as if they have a shot. Which I don’t really think they do, but I do think it’s interesting that no one says anything. Well, I just said something, but I don’t really count.

Orioles 5, Yankees 4: Mark Reynolds struck out four times and then hit what ended up being the tie-breaking single in the 10th. That’s pretty much Mark Reynolds for you. This game was filled with fill-ins, and the regular starters who did play were likely gassed after that late game Tuesday night/Wednesday morning. And it rained some more, which everyone has to be sick of.

Tigers 8, Indians 6: Justin Verlander wasn’t really on his game and it took a Tigers rally in the top of the seventh after he had already thrown his last pitch for him to get the win. But hey, he got the win and someone will give him MVP votes because of it, conveniently forgetting the specifics of this game. Shelley Duncan hit two homers off Verlander. Which was pretty cool for me on a personal level as I got to tell my daughter Mookie that her favorite player totally pwned the best pitcher in the American League.

Phillies 3, Braves 2: And the sweep. Ross Gload with the pinch-hit RBI single in the ninth to win it. And of course it came off the Braves’, what, fourth? Fifth best reliever? Because you can’t use your closer in a tie game on the road? GRRRRRR.

Cardinals 2, Brewers 0: Chris Carpenter tosses a four-hit shutout. The Cardinals are creeping up on the Braves in the wild card chase, by the way. Six and a half back. And they have a series coming up against the Braves in St. Louis tomorrow.

Diamondbacks 5, Rockies 3: Arizona finishes a six-game road trip at 4-2 and play 13 of their last 19 games at home.

Padres 3, Giants 1: The Giants drop their third in the last four games. Aaron Harang allowed one run in seven innings.

Angels 3, Mariners 1: Jerome Williams gave up only one hit — a homer — in eight innings of work. Who’d a thunk he would be helping keep someone’s playoff hopes alive this year?

Twins 5, White Sox 4: The Twins scored four in the third — their first scoring in 20 innings — and they snapped a five game losing streak. Ozzie “I don’t think we lose. I think we just gave this game away.” Sometimes that kind of sentiment is construed as a slam on the other team. But since this was the Twins, it’s probably the best explanation.

Cubs 6, Reds 3: Carlos Pena with a three-run homer in the eighth to break the tie. After the game he talked about coming up in those kinds of situations and how, oftentimes, hitters try “to do too much.”  “See, I could have swung extra hard to try to hit a grand slam with two men on, but I settled for the three-run homer,” I imagined him thinking.

Blue Jays 11, Red Sox 10: Tim Wakefield keeps trying to get that 200th win. Last night the bullpen collapsed, allowing five runs in the eighth and six overall to snatch defeat. This kind of thing should be more concerning for the team, however, than it is for Tim Wakefield’s pursuit of a round number.

Pirates 5, Astros 4:  Andrew McCutchen homered twice. Clint Hurdle got his 600th career victory.

Dodgers vs. Nationals: POSTPONED: My kid’s soccer game went on in driving rain, as scheduled. Man-up, baseball players. Well, no, not really. I understand the difference (dirt, mostly). I just want to tell people that even though I was sick as a dog yesterday I went out to the soccer field anyway, stood in a downpour and watched six-year-old boys hog a soccer ball. Next time I bring the flask.

  1. hittfamily - Sep 8, 2011 at 6:19 AM

    “The Rays are eight back of the Red Sox for the wild card and…”

    Actually the Rays are 7 games out. I know it is asking a lot, but if the Rays sweep their 3 game series against Boston, they are 4 games out with 17 games to go. I am not saying it is likely, but the Rays are a playoff contender. Their pitching is dominant enough to keep them in virtually every game. They were 10.5 games behind Boston a week ago, and just took a series from Texas. I am a Rays fan, and still have my hopes. That is more than I could have asked for in April. September: without C Crawford, Soriano, Pena, and Balfour (with a sub .200 catcher and SS), and there is still a glimmer of playoffs. Thanks Rays for keeping it interesting. Joe Maddon is my pick for coach of the year, playoffs or not.

    • hittfamily - Sep 8, 2011 at 8:32 AM

      Woops. I never even touched on my man Desmond Jennings. He is my new favorite player, and he is running away with it. Dude is in a 4 for 38 slump, and hits an extra inning homerun. Go crazy!!!!

      Not Desmond Jennings. He puts his head down and hauls ass to first base. The ball was 15 rows deep. They showed the Rangers bench, and 3/4 of them started to pack up their stuff before it landed. Not Desmond though. He ran the bases like they should be run. No bat flips, no glances to the dugouts with the “I just won the game stare”. There was no helmet toss, and no David Ortiz “the Lord shines upon me, but not my competitor” hand grab before heaven. He was mugged at home plate, running away from the action. Todd Kalas grabbed him after the game and expected a Paul Bunyon type story. The guys got him with a shaving cream towell to the face, and he jogged off into the dugout without finishing his interview.

      Effing Ballplayer!!!!

      • mpescaro - Sep 8, 2011 at 11:25 AM

        Ortiz points to the sky in honor of his mother. Sort of a “this one’s for you, Ma” kind of thing. Yeah, he’ll flip a bat and watch a home run sail back from time to time, but you can’t really down him for honoring his dead mom. And yes, the Rays are hard to take out of the picture entirely, and it is unbelievable that they have been as strong as they have in a bridge year after losing half the team, but if they knock the Red Sox out of the postseason this year, while two and a half MVP candidates sit atop their lineup every day, it will be the first sign that the apocalyptic prophecies of next year are true.

  2. proudlycanadian - Sep 8, 2011 at 6:35 AM

    Nice games by Moscoso and Jennings. I remember Moscoso pitching a good game against the Jays. It was a wild game in Toronto last night. Wakefield, Bard and Morrow all suffered meltdowns and Francisco almost had a meltdown. Adam Loewen made his first career start as an outfielder and went 1 for 3. The most enjoyable play was a double steal by the Jays. Bautista was on third and Lawrie was on first. When Lawrie took off, Salty threw to second and Bautista then went home. Lawrie ended up on third when the relay to home was wild.

    • joshftw - Sep 8, 2011 at 8:07 AM

      Nothing sweeter than seeing Bard blow a 2-run lead with walks! Except maybe seeing it more often.

      • Joe - Sep 8, 2011 at 8:29 AM

        Speaking of great moments in bullpen management, hat tip to Tito for leaving Bard in to melt down rather than try to squeeze four outs from Papelbon last night. It’s understandable, because Papelbon has thrown close to 100 pitches in the last four weeks.

    • proudlycanadian - Sep 8, 2011 at 8:28 AM

      Boston fans seem to be saying that Bard was responsible for Wakefield not getting career win number 200. Wakefield equally shares the blame as he was ineffective giving up 5 runs and not going deep into the game. Morrow gave the Sox a chance to win as he allowed 8 runs, but collectively, Boston’s pitching staff had an off night handing the win to Toronto. All three games in the series have been very different. I wonder what tonight’s game will bring.

      • Francisco (FC) - Sep 8, 2011 at 8:37 AM

        You know there should be a rule in baseball about not awarding wins to pitchers who give up 5 or more ER, I mean if they do win it’s their hitting team that bailed him out you know? But then I would have to support a rule to not give a pitcher a loss if he only surrendered a single run in 8 IP or something… a lot of gray area… I guess we’ll just have to ignore W-L when determining how good a pitcher really is.

      • Jonny 5 - Sep 8, 2011 at 8:54 AM

        FC, Why even give “wins” and “losses” to pitchers at all? It’s well established that wins and losses aren’t fairly hung on a pitcher many times a season. I don’t see the need to do it. I like to look at it as a team thing, did they win or not during _______’s start in which he pitched____ innings.

      • missthemexpos - Sep 8, 2011 at 8:55 AM

        I would not even hazard a guess as to what the game today will be like. I thought Bard was going to get out of the 8th inning after striking out Wise with high heat, and then a sick strike out pitch against Escobar. However that would turn out to be the pinnacle of his evening, as his complete lack of control after that brought back memories of Kevin Gregg trying to close for the Jays.

      • proudlycanadian - Sep 8, 2011 at 10:24 AM

        AA recently went to Las Vegas to watch Toronto’s Triple A team prior to making the September call ups. He reported that Drabek was pitching much better than his results indicated. He also ran into Pete Rose at a game. (I am not surprised that Rose was in Las Vegas.) Rose has seen several games played in Vegas and gave AA his insights about the players on the team. Rose liked a couple of young pitchers who were subsequently called up and might pitch in the pen next year. AA talks with anyone who might be of help.

      • mpescaro - Sep 8, 2011 at 11:37 AM

        Any time a team scores ten runs and loses, pitching is to blame. The reason people see Bard as responsible is that he gave up a three-run lead. The eighth and ninth have been safe for the Sox all year, and while no one is effective in every game of the season, it must give pause. The rotation is hugely in question. The team is lacking in middle relief. If anything is wrong with Bard, that adds another hole to an already problematic pitching staff. Wakefield did allow five through five, which is obviously a very poor performance, but the guy is 45. I have loved him for years, but he is limping to the end of the season as the team’s best option as a fifth starter. You want to see him get 200, and he’s still doing everything he can to help the team, so you can’t exactly ask more from him than you’re getting. He’s not the guy he used to be.

    • cur68 - Sep 8, 2011 at 9:41 AM

      Hi gents. Late to the party am I? Well never mind. How about that game, eh? Adam Loewen is back. A huge piece of hardware in the end of his humerus has finished his pitching career so the kid is doin’ it with his bat. He came through with his first hit in MLB last night. A little back to back beaver wrestling power with Lawrie in the line up right next to him and the hired guns of Beaver Land got it done, in spite of their ‘closer’ giving up a couple of runs to end his streak of scoreless innings.

      I’m not sure what’s happened to Morrow, he just got torched again, but I do know what happened to Wakefield; father time stood up on that mound with him last night, shaking his wooly, grizzled head, and saying, “Maybe you should consider coaching, Tim”. I agree. He just did not have it at all. Mind you, Daniel Bard was also pretty shaky. Maybe they were intimidated by all that castor wrestling muscle on the bench? Scared me, I tell you.

      JP Arencebia made a little Blue Jay’s catcher history, too with his 21st homerun, a franchise best for a catcher. Not bad going for the kid.

      So the final game in the series goes tonight. For once all of Beaver Land has New York & Florida pulling for them. Is there any more magic left in that team Moose Whisperers? We shall see.

  3. gmc173 - Sep 8, 2011 at 6:46 AM

    Craig good job by the Braves. If you want beat the Phils why not knockout their 2B for a couple of games. Funny how the pitcher had great control for almost every pitch, but when Utley was up he drilled him in the head. Pathetic

    • Lukehart80 - Sep 8, 2011 at 7:53 AM

      Given the circumstances at the time, do you really think it was intentional?

      Funny how every pitcher in major league baseball can throw a small sphere really hard and come awfully close to hitting a small target over 60 feet away time, after time, after time… until they miss that target by a wider margin every once in a while, and occasionally one of those misses happens to hit the guy guy standing a foot and a half away from that target.

      • drmonkeyarmy - Sep 8, 2011 at 7:58 AM

        In my opinion, I can’t imagine it was intentional. He was trying to pitch inside, missed badly and smacked him in the head. That being said, the Phillies can’t continue to let things like this slide. The have players getting beaned left and right. Somebody, preferably David Herndon, needs to let it be known that doming their best players is not acceptable.

      • bleedgreen - Sep 8, 2011 at 8:15 AM

        Polanco was almost hit 2 times in 1 at bat in the same place before he was finally hit the 3rd time. I’m not saying it was intentional, but really? First pitch off the dome piece?

        I always wondered why pitchers don’t look at all apologetic if they hit someone unintentionally like that. I know if I hit a guy, and it wasn’t on purpose, I’d probably say something to the guy.

      • hittfamily - Sep 8, 2011 at 8:53 AM

        “That being said, the Phillies can’t continue to let things like this slide.”

        Yo Army

        We had a hell of a discussion a month ago with the “Flyin Hawaiin” and Eli Whiteside incident. You said that a pitcher intentionally hitting a batter was never acceptable. Now you are calling for it? What gives? The tables are turned, I get it, but pitching inside is part of the game.

        A pitcher knows how to throw to a specific location. He can throw to a mitt on command, and be within a few inches every time. Take intentional walks for example. They never go as planned. The catcher calls for the ball 2 feet outside. The ball goes 8 feet outside, and that is a successful pitchout. Muscle memory is developed, and it is incredibly difficult to break. If you naturally throw outside to right handers, but the batter is diving, it is hard to throw inside. If you miss, there are 2 places to miss. Inside, or right over the heart of the plate. No pitcher wants to miss over the heart of the plate.

        I got into a nice discussion with you. Don’t worry, you won. I maintained Scummarino should have been suspeneded a lot longer than he was. You maintained that intentionally throwing at someone was dangerous, and he should be suspoended longer than Coachbeaterupperino. Why the change of heart, that it is suddenly okay for a back of the bullpen guy to lob one into someones back?

        I hope I convinced you, that a fastball to the back is a perfectly acceptable pitch.

      • drmonkeyarmy - Sep 8, 2011 at 8:59 AM

        Send a message, didn’t say hit anybody. An inside fastball and glare would do. I probably shouldn’t of said Herndon because he has little control over the ball. Maybe Kendrick.

    • hasbeen5 - Sep 8, 2011 at 8:54 AM

      It probably was intentional. Why pitch to Utley when you could just strike out Howard again.

      Seriously though, I don’t think it was even a fastball was it? Looked like a change to me, and a change is not a message pitch.

      • drmonkeyarmy - Sep 8, 2011 at 9:01 AM

        No, it was a 91 MPH “sinker”. I thought it was something off speed at first as well, but it was in fact a sinker.

  4. Reggie's Bush - Sep 8, 2011 at 7:25 AM

    If the Mets played the Marlins for the rest of the season, it would be a good possibility that they catch the Phillies

    • Old Gator - Sep 8, 2011 at 8:48 AM

      They split the season series 9-9. When your goal is to catch a team that’s 40-plus games over the strange attractor, you gotta do better than that.

  5. hittfamily - Sep 8, 2011 at 8:13 AM

    I have a story I’d like to share with the baseball community about the love between a father and son, and how baseball brought them together.

    The Rays were playing Detroit about a week ago. I called my retired father and asked him if he would like to go watch a few ballgames. The Rays had a night game, followed by an afternoon game, so we could drive down, see the night game, hotel it up, go see the day game, and be home before Mom even knew he was gone. Speaking of Mom, I am 30 years old and she still reminds me to put sunscreen on for the daygame. I smirked and agreed to wear it, knowing dad and I would be watching that game, rain or shine, in 72 degree air conditioning. I live in Jacksonville, and he lives in Tallahassee. We are about 3 hours apart. I picked him up around 1 and we pointed it south 4.5 hours to Tampa for a 7pm game.

    When we got there, it looked like rain, so we splurged and parked in the Rays parking lot for $15, rather than the $5 parking 3/4 of a mile away. It was about a 4 minute walk to the gate (awsome spot…especially 45 mins before game time). I bought tickets online that sat us about 30 rows up directly behind home plate. Row EE (rows go a-z,then aa-zz etc.) The Tigers were just finishing BP, and my Rays were doing some stretches in the OF, and most of the youngsters were getting autographs next to the dugout.

    On to the game. Sam Fuld started in left, which is a downer by all sabres that I read, but was exciting to my dad and I because it seems as if he makes a diving catch every game. He didn’t disappoint. He made a spectacular catch down the left field line. Longo hit a homer, Desmond stole a base, and Wade Davis was pitching a gem. Davis gave up either 1 or 2 through 9 innings, and was at fewer than 100 pitches going into the 10th. I pondered if Davis would be sent out for the 10th. I told my dad that I bet it had only happened a handfull of times since the 80’s that a pitcher had gone more than 9. I have researched to the best of my abilities and only found Doc had gone more than 9, 2003 if my memory serves me right (I do not claim this to be fact. I would love any info you all may have). The Rays load the bases in the 10th with 2 outs, and a routine grounder is hit to third. Brandon Inge fields it cleanly, but to my amazement, throws to second. Sean Rodriguez was hustling all the way, and beat the seond baseman to the bag. Rays Win!!!! On Baseball Tonight, the guys crucified the second baseman, but the play was clearly to first. Rodriguez wasn’t being held on, and the second baseman was not in DP depth.

    The second game was just as exciting, however with a worse outcome. Hellickson was masterful as always, so far. Leadoff homer against him, then virtually shut the door. We got to see him strike out 4 guys in 1 inning. I told my dad “that probably happens once a decade”. Dad said “there’s a lot of games a year, I bet it happens more than that”. He whipped out his smart phone before I even thought about getting mine out. 9 times in the last 13 years he informed me, so he was right. It is so cool how that info is accessable instantly. However, there was a stretch in the 70’s and 80’s where it didn’t happen for over 10 years, so I was kind of right in my once per decade thinking. I figured it is very rare for a wild pitch K. Along with that he has to K the other 3 guys as well. I’m still amazed at how often it happens. Hell-Boy took the loss. He gave up 2 earned in 7, and got another L because of our pitiful awfense (I know it’s misspelled. awful offense=awfense . Do you think I’m Nyjer Morgan?)

    I grew up a Braves fan. Mom and Dad took my brother and I to as many games as they could. A trip is planned from 5 hour away Tallahassee to Atlanta, only to spend 30 minutes riding the Marta to get to the game. Fine. When it is raining, and you have to spend an hour huddled in the underbeIly of Fulton county stadium, that is enough to drive a baseball loving kid away. Maybe I had bad luck, but I spent a lot of time avoiding rain as a kid. My dad always insisted on arriving 2-3 hours pregame to watch BP. When they announced they were taking us to a Braves game, there was a sense of excitement, but a sense of “this is going to suck” as well. I spent plenty of time fighting pushy kids in the autograph lines near the bullpen, only to end up with the backup catchers autograph.

    Going to Rays games, I knew there was no way our game would be rained out. When I take my kids to the game, they fight off a few dozen, as opposed to hundreds for autographs. The players are very personable, often asking questions of the kids. There are 2 or 3 guys signing autographs for the kids, as opposed to 1 early 90’s Brave who is pissed about having to do so. Another comes to relieve them after 5 minutes or so, so everyone who wants an autograph, gets one. I spent $28 online for each ticket 30 rows behid home plate, and $15 for parking, to watch the 4th best team in the AL play the 5th best team in the AL (yes, I do believe the Rays are the 4th best team, and the Tigers the 5th). They allow coolers with drinks, so we brought our own drinks. I planned a trip to the Trop, and knew 100% there would be a game played. No rain delays. No reissue of tickets for a makeup. ESPN can criticize a broken light all they want. That caused a 20 minute delay and it occurs every 5 years or so. I knew for a fact there would be no rain delays or rainouts, regardless or the weather. I love the Trop, minor flaws and all.

    So the games and experiences were great. I haven’t even gotten to the best part. Dad caught a foul ball!!! The backstop was low enough that a ball was barely tipped, and it came barreling at the guy 2 rows in front at approximately the same speed it was pitched at. It drilled his hands, and landed softly in my dads. He admired it for a moment, then handed it off to a kid behind us. So Cool!!!! I was so proud of my dad. It was his first foul ball he ever caught, and he gave it to a kid. In full disclosure, he showed it to me, and I said “give it to a kid”. I played college ball, and played with 2 of the guys on the field. A foul ball meant squat to me. What made it cool though, was after dad handed it off to an extremely grateful child, I got to tell my dad for the first time…possibly in my life, I don’t know….that I was proud of HIM. He has said it to me many times, but I am not sure If I have ever said it to him. When he handed it off, I said “I’m really proud of you Dad. That guy (guy in front) gets all the pain, you get the memory, and you made a 10 year old a baseball fan for life” Dad was about to cry, gazing straight ahead with his eyes and lips quivering, which in turn made me about to cry

    Well Done Dad.
    Well done baseball.

    • Matthew Flint - Sep 8, 2011 at 8:39 AM

      Great story! I am envious of you. I am also 30 years old and I spent my whole young life going to the Vet with my dad to watch the Phils. Always in the cheap seats. But besides 93, there wasn’t any reason to spend big money for seats to watch those teams. Plus it was all we could afford.

      Now that I can afford better seats I sit in Sec 147 Row4 (which after they took out the first 3 rows puts me in the 1st row of left center). The only problem is my dad has late stage emphysema and will not go to a game with me. Even if I go with the valet parking and wheelchair accessible seating. He refuses to be wheeled around or to bring extra oxygen if the game goes on longer than expected.

      Point of the reply, I really hope you enjoyed it and that one day my Pop won’t be so stubborn and I can have a similar experience. Thanks for sharing.

    • Alex K - Sep 8, 2011 at 8:47 AM

      I took my Pops to Wrigley for the second time this year. He’s a semi-Cubs fan because of me. He really wanted to see the Giants since they won the World Series last year. As it turns out the game we go to goes 14 and Geo Soto hits a walk-off 3-R HR! It was such an awesome time to sit there and wear rally caps with him and then watch as the Cubs win the game in dramatic fashion. I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

      • Old Gator - Sep 8, 2011 at 8:52 AM

        Terrific post, beautifully written, hitt. It nailed right to the heart what is most wondrous and lovable about our game.

    • sportsdrenched.com - Sep 8, 2011 at 9:31 AM

      Thanks for posting that. The only foul ball I ever caught at an MLB game was also at the Trop.

      My family is kind of different in that, my Mom is the more rabid sports fan. She’s the one who took us to baseball games, and watched the World Series with us. My Dad, he’s more of a gearhead and aviation buff. We bonded by rebuilding carburators, going to air shows and other mechanical shananigans.

      • antlerclaws - Sep 8, 2011 at 9:59 AM

        Baseball mom, airshow dad….sounds like my dream family (I’m the baseball AND airshow dad).

      • sportsdrenched.com - Sep 8, 2011 at 10:14 AM

        Well yeah, I am too. I work in the aviation industry and spend my spare time on sports.

        When hittfamily wrote “sabre” in his original post my first thought was “What do F86’s have to do with this?”

    • Mr. Jason "El Bravo" Heyward - Sep 8, 2011 at 10:46 AM

      I’m happy I took the time to read this. This is the refreshing side of what the comments section can look like. Thank you.

    • indaburg - Sep 8, 2011 at 11:33 AM

      Thank you for the great story, hittfamily. It actually brought tears to my eyes.

      Your story really hits home because my dad died almost 2 months ago from a brain tumor. He introduced me to this wonderful game when I was a little girl. He and I attended our last game together at Tropicana Field last year, last series of the year before the post season, when the O’s played the Rays. We had a great time, even if we did lose 3-0. We didn’t catch any foul balls, and we sat along those awful sight lines in section 130, near the Rays’ bullpen, but it was just like it was when I was a kid, just me and my dad watching a game, and that’s all that mattered. I didn’t know at the time he wouldn’t live to see another game in person. The Trop may not be a beauty, but she does hold some special memories.

  6. Francisco (FC) - Sep 8, 2011 at 8:49 AM

    To: “El Bravo”
    Subject: Re: Dodged Bullet

    Well… subject header says it all dude.

    • Mr. Jason "El Bravo" Heyward - Sep 8, 2011 at 10:25 AM

      Yeah, well Utley didn’t. (wow, even I know that was uncalled for, but I’m still hitting “post comment”)

  7. Francisco (FC) - Sep 8, 2011 at 8:53 AM

    And the sweep. Ross Gload with the pinch-hit RBI single in the ninth to win it. And of course it came off the Braves’, what, fourth? Fifth best reliever? Because you can’t use your closer in a tie game on the road? GRRRRRR.

    Check the Kimbrel road jersey bobble head, it has a tag that says: WARRANTY VOID IF USED IN NON-SAVE SITUATION.

  8. yankeesfanlen - Sep 8, 2011 at 9:03 AM

    If the Yanks have to have a terrible game like yesterday’s, at least AJ was pitching. Can we go to that 4 man rotation now, just to make sure?

  9. Old Gator - Sep 8, 2011 at 9:16 AM

    If anyone doubted that the Feesh were just mailing it in during the dregs of their Cretaceous -Tertiary season, last night should have erased their skepticism once and for all. I don’t want to detract credit from the buckdancing deliveries of R. A. Dickey – easily my favorite non-Feesh ballplayer of all time, perhaps the first hurler to peetch in stream-of-consciousness – but the way these guys are playing reminds me of Cap’n Quint’s description of the “dead eyes, lifeless eyes, like a doll’s eyes” of a slightly more aggressive sort of feesh than the ones currently warping against the boards at Joeprodolsharklife Stadium these days. Congratulations to Matt Dominguez, though, for the first of what his minor league record suggests will be his relatively few hits in the major leagues.

    Yesterday afternoon while fidgeting with the autoselect on my radio as I was crawling up the Palmetto Expressway, moving slowly and deliberately so as not to attract the attention of drivers from an unnamed large island about a hundred miles south of Macondo to my “Viva la revolucion!” bumper sticker (on the left side of the rear fender – my “Jews for Buddha” bumper sticker is on the right side), I stumbled over an interview with the Chihuahua himself. He was announcing that during the end of the (mercifully) final game of the year, the team was going to unveil its new logo and uniform style as the Macondo (as opposed to all-of-Florida) Feesh, a transition which, in purely semiotic terms, suggests an implosion. Well, in this metaphorical sense, there’s some continuity with the way this season has gone since the team hit the basement in June like a nemesis meteor hits the Golfo de Yucatan. The rest of the season has had a few ups but mainly downs, progressing a lot like the father and son in The Road through about a ninety five game long nuclear winter.

    Anyway, the Chihuahua was his usual delusional dog-bites-man self, proudly declaring that the final game at Joeprodolsharklife will be over early enough for the kids to get home and finish their homework, as though he expected to empty the county school system into the ballpark all at once and then expectorate them homeward en masse with dreams of sugarplums and ponderous retractable roof segments dancing in their understimulated little cerebra.

    I was going to go to that game, but now I have to think about it. Do I want to be surrounded by squalling little brats – even imaginary ones – or do I want it to be quiet, like it usually is, so that I can nap peacefully while the Feesh sleepwalk through the game themselves? Children are horrible™.

    • APBA Guy - Sep 8, 2011 at 1:44 PM

      If you want to nap at a ballgame, you are always welcome at the Mausoleum. Guaranteed peace and quiet and you can have a seat section all to yourself. Plus, other attendees will be napping as well, which reduces your chance of winding up on one of those pesky “fan cams”.

  10. uyf1950 - Sep 8, 2011 at 9:27 AM

    The Yankees lost and then the Red Sox did their part by losing as well. So no change in the status quo. To say anymore is hyperbole.

  11. icanspeel - Sep 8, 2011 at 9:32 AM

    Would have been funnier if Hand beat Dickey, instead of Dickey beat Hand, but maybe next time Hand will win

  12. Francisco (FC) - Sep 8, 2011 at 9:35 AM

    R. A. Dickey – easily my favorite non-Feesh ballplayer of all time, perhaps the first hurler to peetch in stream-of-consciousness

    Wasn’t that Dock Ellis?

    • Old Gator - Sep 8, 2011 at 4:27 PM

      Good point. Well then, maybe the first to pitch in unaugmented stream-of-consciousness.

  13. Mr. Jason "El Bravo" Heyward - Sep 8, 2011 at 10:28 AM

    Hard luck losers yesterday… move on quickly please… Let’s ruffle those feathers, Bravos. Redeem yourselves or go the F home.

    • Francisco (FC) - Sep 8, 2011 at 11:33 AM

      I didn’t realize the Mets had feathers. Although it is true some of their players have been too whiny and too chicken…

      • Mr. Jason "El Bravo" Heyward - Sep 8, 2011 at 2:02 PM

        I was looking past the Mets. My bad, I forgot they still played baseball.

  14. APBA Guy - Sep 8, 2011 at 1:53 PM

    Moscoso’s two hitter and 30 consecutive outs says more about the quality of opposition (Royals and Seattle) than it does about his stuff. He’s basically an MLB replacement level pitcher laboring in a pitcher friendly park with a random sequence of good pitching, as opposed to a few of his earlier efforts this year. His FIP of 4.17 and xFIP of 5.17 give a better indication of his real capability than his ERA of 3.34.

    Still, it’s nice to see any A’s pitcher do well enough to avoid having to go to the bullpen in the 6th. Or as we refer to it in the Bay Area: “The Time of Troubles”. To say the pen has been inconsistent this year is like calling the weather back East a bit damp.

    Anyway, the A’s mission now is to get close to .500 by the end of the year so that their year over year decline won’t make Beane look as bad when “Moneyball” opens, then immediately goes to DVD.

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