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Joe Morgan is keeping busy

Sep 8, 2011, 4:00 PM EDT

Joe Morgan headshot

You have a Hall of Fame Second Baseman leading your Chicken Dance. Your argument is invalid:

Reds great and Baseball Hall of Famer Joe Morgan will lead the annual World’s Largest Chicken Dance at Oktoberfest next Saturday … “Oktoberfest-Zinzinnati has long been regarded as the largest Oktoberfest celebration in North America and the second largest in the world,” said Patrick Sheeran, vice president with the Cincinnati USA Regional Chamber. “But in the long and storied history of the event, we have never had a chicken dancer with so much on the job experience.”

Right now a bunch of chickens are standing around scoffing at Morgan with disdain, saying “I don’t see how he can chicken dance. He’s never been a chicken before. To really chicken dance you have to understand what being a chicken is all about.”

  1. paperlions - Sep 8, 2011 at 4:43 PM

    The most important thing for being a great chicken dancer is consistency. If you can be consistently consistent, you could lead a chicken dance some day.

    • The Dangerous Mabry - Sep 8, 2011 at 5:03 PM

      Well done. Your only flaw is actually spelling the word “consistent” correctly.

    • The Dangerous Mabry - Sep 8, 2011 at 5:03 PM

      Also, you might have wanted to note that the greatest chicken dancer of all-time, bar none, was Dave Concepcion.

      • paperlions - Sep 8, 2011 at 5:12 PM

        Nice! Half way through the sentence I knew exactly where you were going.

  2. proudlycanadian - Sep 8, 2011 at 5:02 PM

    The Kitchener Waterloo Octoberfest leads North American in beer consumption. Canadian beer, not that watery stuff drunk in Cincinnati.

    • bloogart7 - Sep 8, 2011 at 5:41 PM

      You’re absolutely right. Forget the “watery stuff drunk in Cincinnati,” which is basically entirely quality German imports. Instead, focus on Canada. Really, German beer and “Canada” are totally synonymous and interchangeable, right?

      Take it from a German: no Oktoberfest that actually takes place mostly in October (or 100%, like this Kitchener business) is worth half a stale pretzel. It’s meant to be a September celebration. And the most legit one outside of Deutschland happens in Zinzinnati.

      Now…what were we saying about Joe Morgan again?

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