Sep 21, 2011, 3:15 PM EST
Esquire magazine has a regular feature called “What I’ve Learned” in which they ask people for words of wisdom and their latest subject is White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen, who predictably provided plenty of amusing quotes.
For instance, about his wife:
What attracted me to my wife is she’s hot. She’s also nice, she’s a great mom — but that comes after she’s hot.
I tell my kids all the time: When you’re about to do something stupid, think about your mom. Why? Because she’s the one that’s gonna suffer inside.
Or about ESPN Chicago beat reporter Doug Padilla:
We had this media guy, Padilla. He was eating a cheeseburger during the game. I saw him while I was managing. I grabbed the phone, called the PR department, and said, “Doug, you’re gonna choke on that f***ing cheeseburger.” Then I hung up. People wonder, How the f*** did you see him? But I see everything.
And my personal favorite:
A lot of people think I dye my hair. No, I don’t give a f***.
He’s the best.
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- The Cubs have offered Jon Lester “north of $135 million” 51
- Pablo Sandoval’s deal: five years, $98 million plus an option 40
- Kyle Seager, Mariners close to $100 million extension 25
- The 2015 Hall of Fame ballot is out — Randy Johnson, Pedro Martinez are new on the ballot 286
- So what would the Red Sox look like with Hanley Ramirez and Pablo Sandoval? 49
- UPDATE: Red Sox finalizing a 4-year, $88 million deal with Hanley Ramirez, with a vesting option 35
- MLB players react to Odell Beckham, Jr. catch on Sunday Night Football 27
- The 2015 Hall of Fame ballot is out — Randy Johnson, Pedro Martinez are new on the ballot (286)
- More Hall of Fame ballots like Adam Rubin’s please (136)
- UPDATE: The Pablo Sandoval-Red Sox deal is done, pending a physical (133)
- Report: Pablo Sandoval chose the Red Sox over the Giants because he felt disrespected (131)
- Report: “There is a 90 percent chance that Pablo Sandoval will sign with the Red Sox” (130)