Comments on: Ozzie Guillen angry at White Sox pitching coach Don Cooper

By: Old Gator

Old Gator — Wed, 19 Oct 2011 02:37:11 +0000

Some years back (some decades back, I mean) a few friends and I made up tags like you find hanging from the sleeves of overpriced sport jackets proudly announcing the blend of :genuine” cotton or wool from which the thing was patched together. Our tags had a black footprint in a white circle and the legend “Genuine Yeti” around the circle. We walked through the lady’s apparel section of Lord and Taylor’s and stuck these tags on the sleeves of a whole bunch of fur coats.

This was before PETA, which is kind of a shame….

By: baseballisboring

baseballisboring — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 22:18:46 +0000

Yeah, I don’t think it’s like a radio broadcast on a 10-second delay. I think some FCC fines are in the near future…

By: cur68

cur68 — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 20:32:12 +0000

Your pain, anger and helplessness, while distressing in someone I like, is also weirdly fascinating and instructive. Should the Jays ever acquire a Manager whom I despise as much as you despise Oz, I shall attempt to raise my bar to where yours is at. Until then I’m remain a student.

So, what have I learned today? First, the term ‘fecal bolus’ is repulsive but I wish i’d thought of it. Second, I need to get an octopus. Third I can now spell “sasquatch” which is one better than those who use it in their blog handle. All in all a good day.

By: Old Gator

Old Gator — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 19:44:06 +0000

As my fellow kaiju fiend Gamera will appreciate, and as Steve Martin informed us in the 1956 Americanized edition of Godzilla, the mother of all kaiju, "everyone in the city was on a watch and wait basis. The wait...was not a long one."

By: Old Gator

Old Gator — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 19:41:14 +0000

So you asserted above.

And you’re (pardon me, “your” [sic]) still illitirit.

By: Old Gator

Old Gator — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 19:39:11 +0000

sasquash20: your also illitirit. “Sasquash” is spelt “sasquatch.” Go back to junyer hie scool.

Gamera: me too. Back in grad school I used to own one myself (until, like everybody else’s pet octopus, he got the screen off the siphon tube and squeezed out into the filter box, splatted on the floor next to the tank, crawled over the carpet and dried out, and was found as a desiccated lump caked with dust and dog hair in a corner behind the love seat). I used to love to have him show off the shrimp-in-the-jar trick to visiting females of my own species – coeds, so you know they were serious about their fascinations – who also found it fascinating.

I am sure, though, that if I had taken them back out to the garden shed and showed them the cage with Slobbering Ozzie in it, they would have listened to his incoherent profanity for thirty seconds and left me for one of the football players.

By: sasquash20

sasquash20 — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 19:18:08 +0000

Your just a hater gator! Deal with it loser

By: sasquash20

sasquash20 — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 19:13:42 +0000

Are you serious? Your just a hater. Your also clueless.

By: cur68

cur68 — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 18:50:17 +0000

Oz kind of comes off as a slighted gang member here. Its going to be interesting in Florida next year, in a “waiting for a sh*t storm” kind of interesting way.

By: Gamera the Brave

Gamera the Brave — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 18:40:34 +0000

Respecfully, Gator, I find an octopus figuring out how to get a shrimp out of a closed jar damed interesting, what with their squishy brains and all.

I still cannot get DirecTV to carry “The Cephalopod Channel”, so this kind of a hot button for me…

By: proudlycanadian

proudlycanadian — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 18:08:48 +0000

He seems to have some anger management issues.

By: Walk

Walk — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 17:24:14 +0000

Only point i can see ozzie having here is if he was cooper’s agent. Otherwise his paycheck has nothing to do with ozzie. From everything i see quoted here it really seems like ozzie wanted everyone to leave if he left and when coop did not leave ozzie felt betrayed. Apparently in ozzie land you have integrity if you refuse a job because a crappy manager. was not going to get a contract extension

By: mondzy805

mondzy805 — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 17:05:41 +0000

Man, its just Ozzie being Ozzie. But he has a point.

By: Old Gator

Old Gator — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 16:14:46 +0000

Well, if there’s room for an occasional diamond inside a kimberlite pipe, I guess there might be room for a nugget of paranoia compacted within all of Slobbering Ozzie’s expletives.

By: Old Gator

Old Gator — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 16:12:42 +0000

If this team becomes a contender under this gutter level moron, it will be despite him rather than because of him. He’s going to be nothing more than another embarrassment to a community that already has far more of its share of embarrassments than anyplace outside of a Kansas school board meeting. And all of the completely unmerited attention this drooling clown receives from the media is only stoking his egomaniacal conviction that his lowlife shenanigans and expectoration are not only alright, but are actually creditable. He’s not even as interesting as an octopus figuring out how to get a shrimp out of a closed jar.

By: El Bravo

El Bravo — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 15:51:54 +0000

So in other words, you embrace Ozzie and look forward to him making your team a contender again.

By: sknut

sknut — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 15:40:58 +0000

It has been speculated that Coop ‘spied’ on the other coaches for Williams and Coop was his guy where as the other coaches were Ozzie’s guys. It was obvious time for a change but I do think Ozzie has a valid point in between all the expletives.

By: Old Gator

Old Gator — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 15:38:24 +0000

Ozzie’s time outside a padded cell is up.

By: qcubed3

qcubed3 — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 15:31:00 +0000

None of this rant makes any sense. Why in the world would Ozzie even be upset in the first place that the pitching coach (whom he calls a great coach) sought a contract extension to remain the pitching coach?

Clearly, Ozzie’s time with the Sox was up.

By: bigleagues

bigleagues — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 15:22:53 +0000

Considering that ES-f***ing-PN is rated god***m G – rated – how the f*** are they gonna keep up with all those f***ing expletives coming from that s***mouthed Ozzie?!

By: lovesmesomeme

lovesmesomeme — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 15:21:31 +0000

At one point he throws him under him under the bus with the he’s Kenny Williams b***h then helps him out from under it by calling him not just a good coach but a great one. Ozzie is awesome. Get ready south Florida here be comes.

By: Old Gator

Old Gator — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 15:18:29 +0000

It’s as old as the hills and as pointlessly vulgar for a guy in Slobbering Ozzie’s situation as Detroit slum playground talk. A gem? Well it ain’t sixteen bars of gold pressed laudenum, that’s for sure. I don’t even think Quark would have trafficked in it. This is the Slobbering Ozzie who swore he would “manage with class” if the Feesh were dumb enough to hire him. Buddha knows I’m no semantic prude, but I’m not a public figure. I might not even exist for all anybody knows or cares. I might just be an A/I formed spontaneously in the Matrix around nuclei of random bytes of stored information.

On the other hand, though, this is the same Slobbering Ozzie who, as manager of a major league baseball team, should be at least marginally aware that there are kids out there – seriously misguided kids, to be sure, but kids just the same – who will be buying little replica Slobbering Ozzie uniforms and looking up to him. It would serve their parents right if they started talking like him and flunking their English FCATs on purpose so they could be as much like that loudmouthed fecal bolus as possible.

I don’t know if Slobbering Ozzie has it in him to take this team anywhere it otherwise doesn’t have the onfield talent to go, any more that Flat Eddie or the Curmudgeonly Undead before him. It’s clear, however, that he has it in him to disgrace himself as least as often and as unbearably as he did on a daily basis in Chicago.

Yea

By: El Bravo

El Bravo — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 15:02:56 +0000

“Yes, we want to f— you, but we don’t want to marry you.’’ …this isn’t just a “gem”, it’s a f@cking diamond.