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Astros’ Jordan Schafer to be arraigned on drug charges

Nov 7, 2011, 1:06 PM EDT

Jordan Schafer AP

Astros outfielder Jordan Schafer was arrested last month in Florida for possession of marijuana and Zachary Levine of the Houston Chronicle reports that his arraignment has been set for next Monday.

In addition to the initial third-degree marijuana possession felony Schafer is also being charged with drug paraphernalia possession, which is a misdemeanor.

According to the police report Schafer was arrested with 25.9 grams of marijuana when he pulled up next to a police car while holding a joint in the parking lot of a Cheesecake Factory, which probably warrants a third charge of first-degree stupidity.

  1. missthedayswhenwedidnthavetologin - Nov 7, 2011 at 1:17 PM

    His career’s up in….smoke!

  2. purnellmeagrejr - Nov 7, 2011 at 1:23 PM

    From the sounds of it he probably rolled one fatty out of his ounce and didn’t even have a chance to finish it.

    • Old Gator - Nov 7, 2011 at 1:28 PM

      I teenk he say hees name ees blauuuuggggghhhhhhhh….

    • Old Gator - Nov 7, 2011 at 1:29 PM

      Too much Labrador in it, man….

  3. Kyle - Nov 7, 2011 at 1:24 PM

    I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, the parking lot at the Cheesecake Factory is one shady locale.

  4. Old Gator - Nov 7, 2011 at 1:27 PM

    Can we pull our heads out of our collective asses just long enough to decriminalize weed and stop mindlessly feeding the cartels? We could easily regulate cannabis like alcohol and collect enough sales tax on this stuff to float Medicare for another hundred years. Instead, we’re wasting a fortune prosecuting these arrests, interfering with doctor-patient relationships in states that have had the wisdom to legalize medical marijuana and otherwise decriminalize the stuff, and otherwise stuffing our already inadequate prisons with victimless crime types who wind up going before some dumbshit judge who still mentally lives somewhere between the battle of Jericho and Prohibition.

    Enough of this crap, already.

    • phukyouk - Nov 7, 2011 at 1:35 PM

      I give it another 5-7 years max before weed is legal in the US with the exact same rules and regulations as Alcohol.

      • drmonkeyarmy - Nov 7, 2011 at 1:41 PM

        I agree it should be, but I think it will take longer then 5-7 years. Here is the problem though: with alcohol there is a set, quantifiable limit to the legal driving limits. If one is over, one is charged with DUI. How would that work for marijuana? How would the police be able to tell if somebody is legally impaired without having a distinct measuring tool? For example, somebody takes several rips off a bong and hours later drives in order to run some errands. The person gets pulled over for a minor traffic violation and the officer suspects the driver is impaired. Blood tests will show THC in the system….but that would show up if the driver smoked within a incredibly large time frame (weeks possibly months). It is a quandary. I think this hurdle needs to be passed in order for marijuana to become legal.

      • phukyouk - Nov 7, 2011 at 1:56 PM

        I would imagine that its simple enough to say if there is X amount of THC in his blood stream it means he smoked X in Y time and therefore it is illegal. similar to BAC. now i don’t know HOW that tool works but I don’t think it would be all that difficult, right?

      • cur68 - Nov 7, 2011 at 2:24 PM

        Nah. It could be pretty simple. Tongue scraping. The epithelial cells inside the mouth turn over ~ Q24h. I bet they’d be loaded with THC if you’d been smoking within a few hours, lets say 3 since I’m making up numbers, and largely gone, given the very moist nature of the inside of the mouth, within about 5 – 6 hours. If not tongue, then definitely a nasal swab will turn it up for at least 8 hours. If you do both then you’d be accurate to about few hours.

      • JB (the original) - Nov 7, 2011 at 3:04 PM

        Police don’t need a “weed specific” drug test. It would just fall under “impaired” driving, same as if you were over tired, or on some sort of medication; that’s what they are using for people pulled over high on “bath salts” and “herbal incense”.

        I think more the reason is that while it’s a pain in the ass (comparatively) to brew beer, wine, or have a still out back to produce your own alcohol (read “tax revenue” to gov’t types), anyone can grow weed pretty easily. No taxes–no legal.

      • drmonkeyarmy - Nov 7, 2011 at 3:31 PM

        Then anybody who gets pulled over who has smoked marijuana within the time frame that it takes ones body to metabolize it to trace levels would be guilty of impaired driving. Also, people metabolize it at dramatically different rates…way way more so than alcohol. Furthermore, I don’t think Cur’s suggestion would work. I know I have a good reason for it but my mind isn’t functioning at 100% this afternoon. I think this would present a real challenge for law enforcement.

      • okobojicat - Nov 7, 2011 at 4:09 PM

        @JB…Its actually incredibly easy to brew beer yourself.

        $100 worth of equipment (you can get buy with less) and $15-$30 per 5 gal (48 12-oz bottles) batch. Running a distillery creates a much larger investment and time span.

        Its not a good comparison.

      • JB (the original) - Nov 7, 2011 at 4:17 PM

        When cops pull you over (typically) it’s for driving behavior–that’s where the “impaired” comes in, not some random % of THC or whathaveyou in your bloodstream, so I’m not sure what you’re getting at. If you are overtired and have blood/piss clean as the driven snow, you can still be charged with “impaired” driving.

        I brew beer, so yes, I know it’s easy, but it’s still much more effort than the ‘typical’ person is willing to go through to be able to knock a few back after work.

      • drmonkeyarmy - Nov 7, 2011 at 4:27 PM

        People are also pulled over for things other than suspicion of impaired driving or traffic violations. If an officer pulls one over who they suspect has consumed alcohol, they go through the field sobriety test…but the kicker is the subsequent blood test and breathalyzer to determine the blood alcohol level. Above which you are in trouble, below which you are ok. If one is pulled over and the officer suspects marijuana use (not in the car, but subsequent to driving) there is no standardized numbers below which you are okay, above which there is a problem. My assertion is that it is extremely difficult if not impossible to come up with those numbers because of the wide variation in individual metabolism of marijuana. The police cannot simply give out citations for “driving while impaired” for those with marijuana in their system because it cannot be proven in what time frame the THC was consumed.

      • lyon810 - Nov 7, 2011 at 6:34 PM

        where does your 5-7 window come from?

    • paperlions - Nov 7, 2011 at 2:15 PM

      Possession of a small amount is decriminalized in CT now, not legal…but not a crime, you just get fined.

    • stlouis1baseball - Nov 7, 2011 at 2:43 PM

      I hear you Gator. But as it currently stands…the Powers that be just continue to bury their heads in the sand like a phuqing Ostrich and think things will change.
      Over…and over…and over…and over…and OVER.
      Just keep lockin’ em’ up…and building more prisons.

  5. phukyouk - Nov 7, 2011 at 1:30 PM

    I would assume that he was also charged with DUI, right? i mean who gives a fu*k if he has or was smoking some weed… but driving while possibly high is just plain stupid

  6. gallaghedj311 - Nov 7, 2011 at 2:00 PM

    Take it from a long time pot smoker, pot DOES NOT affect your ability to operate a vehicle. The only people who would disagree are people who have never done it. It’s completely different than alcohol. It anything, it heightens awareness….. 25.9 grams? If he squeezed 2.1 grams into one rolling paper, that’s one fat joint…..

    • phukyouk - Nov 7, 2011 at 2:51 PM

      I will not self incriminate myself here but i STRONGLY disagree with part of that statement. like or not it does impair your senses. I agree that it is nothing like alcohol in that you are much more aware of your surroundings ( paranoia anyone?) but it most certainly can, will and has caused major accidents in the past.

      • cur68 - Nov 7, 2011 at 3:24 PM

        Dudez, its a variable effect, like alcohol. Some people when drunk are happy, some sad, some angry. Ditto THC. Its the 7 dwarves with that stuff. You get your Sleepys, Happys, Hungrys, Dopeys, Paranoids & (my fave part about THC) THC seems to make women…willing to engage in physical affection. Legalize it, sell licenses for home production, produce better stuff commercially for cheaper with known THC amounts and it’ll be just like cookies: the stuff grandma bakes are the best but sometimes, having a big ‘ole box of Chips Ahoy, is what you can get & that’s not too bad. Whatever your reaction to it, though. Don’t be driving. That’s what pizza delivery is for.

      • Old Gator - Nov 7, 2011 at 3:30 PM

        In my day, you couldn’t get any self-respecting pizzeria to send Ripple. It was sangria or nothing.

      • cur68 - Nov 8, 2011 at 3:11 AM


  7. pete1050 - Nov 8, 2011 at 2:05 PM

    Well, we all seem to agree that marijuana should be decriminalized. Do we also all agree that it is incredibly retarded for a professional baseball player to be driving around with a joint in his hands and an ounce of the sticky-icky as a passenger while it’s illegal? I’m a big believer of privacy – whatever you do in the confines of your own home is none of my business – but Christ, what a dumbass! Won’t be picking him up in next year’s fantasy draft.

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