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Actual baseball team meets with Sidney Ponson’s agent for some reason

Nov 16, 2011, 4:40 PM EDT

Sidney Ponson

Every year something happens in the offseason that makes me think that I can’t handle the looniness anymore. That the hot stove season has reached its nadir. After which I say that I cannot handle another weird rumor or report. When I say “not again. The line must be drawn here! This far, no further!”

That usually happens in mid-January.  This year it happened on November 16, in a tweet from Gordon Wittenmyer of the Chicago Sun-Times:


Sideny Ponson. Who hasn’t pitched since 2009 and hasn’t pitched well since 2003.  I’m going to assume for the sake of my sanity that the A’s official in question is the brother-in-law or college roommate of Ponson’s agent and that the meeting was a social affair.

If not, I’ll be in the bar.  Until mid-February.


  1. WhenMattStairsIsKing - Nov 16, 2011 at 4:42 PM

    “HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” ~ Billy Beane

  2. DJ MC - Nov 16, 2011 at 4:45 PM

    Craig, I will not let you besmirch the good name of Sidney Ponson like this!

    He does it enough by himself to cover the rest of us.

    Signed, a Orioles fan who actually liked the guy at one point.

  3. stlouis1baseball - Nov 16, 2011 at 4:45 PM

    You never dissapoint me Craig. I am now able to tell ascertain if you wrote an article based soley on the wording, context and/or scarcasm of the subject. I mean that in a complimentary way of course.
    Well done.

    • WhenMattStairsIsKing - Nov 16, 2011 at 4:47 PM

      Scarcasm? Is that sarcasm based on the mental and emotional scars left by another?

      • stlouis1baseball - Nov 16, 2011 at 5:05 PM

        I sincerely thank you for pointing out my spelling error Mrs. Reynolds.

  4. normb11 - Nov 16, 2011 at 4:49 PM

    I think Wittenmyer had this same tweet yesterday about the Cubs. Perhaps he’s trying to be cute because “ponson’s agent” also represents one or more of the bigger names of this years FA crop.

  5. lanflfan - Nov 16, 2011 at 4:53 PM

    I picture Captain Picard (Patrick Stewart) vocalizing this article as I believe he used those exact words “not again. The line must be drawn here! This far, no further!” in discussing the Borg.

    Yes, you can like Star Trek and sports, they are not mutually exclusive.

    • Kevin S. - Nov 16, 2011 at 4:59 PM

      Heh, picked up on that, too. Between that and Gator’s affectionate nickname for my team, I was terrified for a moment that Cashman was looking at Round 2. Fortunately it’s just the As.

  6. The Common Man - Nov 16, 2011 at 4:55 PM

    What? Drunken louts are the new extra 2%.

    • DJ MC - Nov 16, 2011 at 5:01 PM

      I believe you mean 4 proof.

      • The Common Man - Nov 16, 2011 at 5:18 PM

        Nicely done.

  7. SmackSaw - Nov 16, 2011 at 5:08 PM

    I bet Ponson is even fatter now

  8. trevorb06 - Nov 16, 2011 at 5:11 PM

    Wait, wait, wait… Ponson still has an agent?!

    • spudchukar - Nov 16, 2011 at 5:34 PM

      That is where I was going. Are they like Supreme Court Justices?

  9. Tyree Studio - Nov 16, 2011 at 5:27 PM

    As a Royals fan I appreciate you adding a picture of him sweating in a KC uniform. Brings back warm and fuzzy memories.

    • spudchukar - Nov 16, 2011 at 5:36 PM

      This all seemed preposterously funny to me, then I recalled the 2011 K.C. starting quintet.

      • Tyree Studio - Nov 16, 2011 at 5:40 PM

        Well at least it wasn’t a blog post about this guy’s agent meeting with a team:

    • DJ MC - Nov 16, 2011 at 7:23 PM

      I think they have a cream for that. He probably caught it in a Baltimore club, so I apologize on behalf of us all.

  10. scatterbrian - Nov 16, 2011 at 5:46 PM

    Pretty sure if anyone signs Sidney Pontoon, it’s to fill out their AAA rotation. Please?

  11. Bryz - Nov 16, 2011 at 5:58 PM

    Baseball executive 1: “We need to make sure this jersey fits Prince Fielder before we sign him. But who can try it on to make sure it’s the right size?”

    Baseball executive 2: “Let’s call up Sidney Ponson. He’s about the same size, and no one will catch on to our true intentions.”

  12. scatterbrian - Nov 16, 2011 at 6:09 PM

    Wittenmeyer also says that the Rockies met with Milton Bradley’s agent.

  13. chip56 - Nov 17, 2011 at 9:20 AM

    In fairness – lots of people mocked the Yankees for bringing Colon in for Spring Training – that worked out pretty well.

  14. foreverchipper10 - Nov 17, 2011 at 11:07 AM

    Wasn’t he knighted? Isn’t he….ahem….Sir Sidney? Or was that just a bad dream….?

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