Nov 30, 2011, 4:12 PM EST
Best shape of my life? Ha! Try this on for size. From La Velle Neal:
[Carlos] Gutierrez, I’ve been told, has rededicated himself to conditioning during the offseason and wants to come to camp in the best shape ever. He reported last year noticeably heavier. He could be a bullpen wild card if he can sharpen a second pitch to go with his outstanding sinker.
I take that to mean not just Gutierrez’s life, but the best shape of all people of all time everywhere. It’s the most likely explanation.
But no, I’m not going to change the meme from BSOML to BSE. Because by definition, only Gutierrez could fit the latter category.
- Justin Upton traded to the Padres for three prospects 51
- Bud Selig will get a $6 million a year pension. Which is obscene. 79
- Jake Peavy agrees to a two-year, $24 million deal to stay with the San Francisco Giants 13
- Matt Kemp has officially been traded to the Padres 28
- Padres acquire catcher Derek Norris from Athletics 35
- St. Petersburg City Council votes down deal to allow Rays to look for new stadium site 89
- What will the future of Cuban players in MLB look like? 25
- Royals sign Edinson Volquez for two years, $20 million 29
- Baseball’s highest-ranking Hispanic woman employee sues for discrimination (163)
- The United States will seek to normalize relations with Cuba (144)
- Cubs, Red Sox, Dodgers, Padres, Rangers, and Astros interested in Phillies’ Cole Hamels (111)
- Rays, Padres, Nationals agree to 11-player trade (97)
- Chase Headley signs a four-year deal with the Yankees worth at least $52 million. (95)