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Nats minor leaguer suspended 50 games

Jan 5, 2012, 4:15 PM EDT

Image (1) Washington-Nationals-logo.gif for post 3589

Major League Baseball just announced that Washington Nationals minor leaguer Zechry Zinicola has received a 50-game suspension.  Not PEDs, though. His suspension comes after a second violation of “a drug of abuse” pursuant to the Minor League Drug Prevention and Treatment Program.  Two things:

1. I vaguely remember Zinicola pitching for the Columbus Clippers a few years ago during the two-year period the Clippers were a Nationals affiliate.  Note: everyone in Columbus has forgotten that the Clippers were a Nationals affiliate. It’s like it never happened. Sometimes I think I dreamed it;

2. I really wish they’d tell us what the “drugs of abuse” in question are for these things. Because depending on what the drug is, these suspensions could either be tragic or actually somewhat interesting. I mean, it’s never good to be on drugs, but it would tell us something very different about Zinicola if he was taking cocaine, for example, or if he was found in an opium den with some 19th century Chinese railroad workers down by the docks or something.

Anyway, Zinicola has an ERA of 4.05 in 293 minor league innings. So while this suspension is bad for him, it’s not exactly going to impact the Nats’ plans, I wouldn’t guess.

  1. The Common Man - Jan 5, 2012 at 4:19 PM

    I call B.S. No way “Zechry Zinicola” is a real name.

  2. natsattack - Jan 5, 2012 at 4:32 PM

    Noooooooooo! He was, like, 73rd on our depth charts. Critical loss.

    • natstowngreg - Jan 5, 2012 at 6:11 PM

      Don’t be so hard on the kid. He was more like 37th.

  3. dennisinsf - Jan 5, 2012 at 4:35 PM

    He wouldn’t even be the first Z-Z named player, I believe that belongs to Zeke Zeiss

  4. Kyle - Jan 5, 2012 at 4:53 PM

    Smart money says this dude was licking frogs.

  5. lookatthefarside - Jan 5, 2012 at 4:55 PM

    The Chinese railroad workers and opium den comment is uncalled for. Try using modern day times, idiot.

    • Craig Calcaterra - Jan 5, 2012 at 5:07 PM

      Except the point was to use an intentionally antiquated reference so that people with modern, currently-existing drug problems would not be the butt of a joke.

  6. lookatthefarside - Jan 5, 2012 at 5:11 PM

    Oh so just offend Chinese families whose relatives were working the railroad back in the day. Yeah, I’m sure all of em hung out in opium dens when their day was over.

    • Craig Calcaterra - Jan 5, 2012 at 5:16 PM

      No, not all of them were. But 100% of the ones who did did.

      • luckywi - Jan 5, 2012 at 6:09 PM

        Oh, and there is the tiny fact that the opium dens were used to enslave the Chinese railroad workers. Fun fact: there is a bar in Portland OR that was used way back in the 19th Century, for the express purpose of getting them high on opium, and taking them through a secret tunnel to the boats waiting on the Willamette to to be enslaved there. White Eagle. Ask the bartender. I have seen the dens in the basement. Loved the reference, by the way, Craig. And agree it would be nice to know if the guy was on Timmy’s bus, or in a hotel with “The Straw”. Or, “Doc”. Or “Hendu”. Or any of the Pirates from the 80′s…..

    • luckywi - Jan 5, 2012 at 6:36 PM

      And your handle is lookatthefarside? Wow. How about Santas list of ten ways to cook venison? Could be deemed offensive. But you like”The Far Side” enough to use that as your handle? Pot, I’d like you to meet the kettle.

    • illegalblues - Jan 5, 2012 at 6:44 PM

      i think there’s better things to get upset about, pal.

  7. theonlynolan - Jan 5, 2012 at 5:54 PM

    Lookatthefarside, I didn’t know it was possible for someone to get offended about something so stupid. Are you really this overly sensitive or do you just like to show everyone how enlightened you are?

  8. jackkoho - Jan 5, 2012 at 6:24 PM

    I love how everyone here worships Craig and how every time someone calls him out for saying anything wrong at all the entire HBT community of craig followers jumps down that persons throat.

    Think for yourselves, people.

    • jackkoho - Jan 5, 2012 at 6:25 PM

      reply coming in 3….2….1… about the reasoning for this happening is because of how great of a person craig actually is and how hes actually right all of the time.

      Amount of thumbs downs I expect to receive – 50+

    • luckywi - Jan 5, 2012 at 6:32 PM

      I don’t worship Craig. And will happily disagree with him. People who take them selves too seriously though? Different story. It’s a freaking joke. That actually makes a good point. Maybe just bite your “tongue”, and get out of Mom’s basement for some fresh air, and reality?

      • jackkoho - Jan 5, 2012 at 6:38 PM

        And when you disagree with him how many thumbs down do you get?

    • theonlynolan - Jan 5, 2012 at 6:40 PM

      I actually do worship Craig and as a result will defend him to the very end. That’s the only reason I made my comment. I’m totally incapable of forming my own thoughts or opinions and therefore rely on Calcattera to do it for me. I’m a sad, sad, man.

    • jackkoho - Jan 5, 2012 at 6:40 PM

      Its ridiculous, really. Craig actually has his own fan-fic. I mean, come on, people.

    • paperlions - Jan 5, 2012 at 8:38 PM

      Craig doesn’t need anyone to defend him (I mean, if he’s going to wear those super-dorky hipster glasses, I really couldn’t bring myself to do it anyway)…..you you actually pay any attention whatsoever, you would notice that people that say anything stupid in response to anyone’s comment get a shitload of thumbs down and earn themselves some responses….it doesn’t matter if it is Craig or Joe-commenter (no offense to people named Joe). On this site, dumb-assed comments get lambasted.

  9. lookatthefarside - Jan 5, 2012 at 6:39 PM

    Luckywi,
    You may be excused due to the fact that your brain is full.

    • luckywi - Jan 5, 2012 at 6:45 PM

      Too much reality, I guess. You may not be excused, because you mom said you have to finish your vegetables. And then you have to do the dishes, and do your homework.

  10. jackkoho - Jan 5, 2012 at 8:00 PM

    I hope you all feel like assholes when it is revealed that lookatthefarside’s great grandfather was killed while working as a Chinese railroad worker.

    • theonlynolan - Jan 5, 2012 at 8:22 PM

      I had a relative who died on the Titanic, but I don’t get all bent out of shape everytime a joke is made about a boat sinking.

    • cur68 - Jan 5, 2012 at 9:39 PM

      Many of my Asian relatives died as indentured workers: their deaths were directly due to their lives of virtual slavery. I took no offence to Craig’s post. Strikes me that those who get worked up over this trivial stuff take a formulaic view of racism. In my experience (given that this is 43 years of being a visible minority) this an entire non-issue as far as I’m concerned since what was written was not meant as labeling the Chinese people of today nor, if you knew any history at all, of those from back in the day. If he’d written “rasta smoke shop” I’d have taken it as a fairly accurate descriptor (& I happen to be predominantly West Indian).

      Where are all you up-in-arms holier-than-thou types when the homophobia gets slung around here? That crap’s pretty unambiguous. I don’t recall ever seeing any outrage about that from the likes of some of you.

  11. Jonny 5 - Jan 5, 2012 at 9:27 PM

    I feel like what a fly on the wall of Danver State hospital must have felt like reading these comments. So I might as well say my peace on Opium dens. They’re serious man, I’m telling you. I know a guy who was in one in Thailand.He was playing ping-pong in Ding-Dang. A high stakes game in some opium den. Turns out, these aren’t the types of guys who like to lose. When He beat them, they beat him up. They worked him over good. And this is hard to say. They held him down and shoved a ping-pong paddle up his butt. And it wasn’t the handle end either. He’s been pooping pancakes ever since.

  12. hushbrother - Jan 6, 2012 at 2:20 AM

    Craig, do your readers a favor and never, ever use the phrase “pursuant to” in one of your blog posts again.

    As you well know, the only place you ever see that phrase being used is in legal documents. It seems to be a rule that every legal document has to include at least eleven “pursuant to”s, along with nine “it shall be stated”s and forty-seven “§§”s in every sentence. No one likes reading legal documents, because it means you’re probably in some annoying situation you don’t want to be in and you have no choice but to read it.

    So, seriously. Knock off the legal jargon. Non-lawyers are put off by it.

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