Mar 7, 2012, 7:51 AM EDT
After I left the ballpark yesterday afternoon I came back to my hotel and placed my health first among all other things. First, I moved into my new non-smoking room, which was good for my lungs. Then I went to the fitness center and ran on a treadmill for 45 minutes which was good for my heart, body and soul.
Then I went to In-n-Out Burger and ate this followed by a trip to a dive bar called TT Roadhouse where I hoisted the moist with a friend of mine. No, I don’t think it’s safe to say that I’m in the best shape of my life after all of that. Hell, I’m not even in the best shape of the bloggers on this site.
The friend of mine was a former sportswriter and former blogger named Connor Doyle who I met back in the Shysterball days. When I was here last year, as some of you may remember, I had beers with him and DIPS legend Voros McCracken and nearly started a race riot. Last night wasn’t quite as scary, but it definitely turned strange.
We had been there a little over an hour or so when a man with a gigantic head wound came up and sat down at our table and began talking to us. He began in mid-sentence as if he had been with us all night, and took up the political conversation Connor and I were having. Well, OK then. He did pause long enough for Connor to ask him what happened to his head. Seems he was walking with a girl last week when a man ran him over with a car and then drove away. He treated the explanation as though it was bothersome and unimportant and continued on with his political monologue. Well, OK again.
The substance of the monologue: if he had a time machine and could go back and change one historical event, it would be to prevent women getting the right to vote. Really: that’s when he believes all of our country’s problems began.
“The 50s were great,” he said. “Everything was going just fine until women got the vote.”
“You realize that by the 50s women had been voting for over 30 years,” I said.
He just kind of stopped for a second, considered the thought, ignored it and moved on. And to be fair to him, he did expand the point: it wasn’t just women voting that was the problem. It was all racial minorities, homosexuals and “children.” I thought I’d comfort him by telling him that children still don’t have the right to vote, but I couldn’t really get a word in.
From there we moved on to evolution (“So you believe we came from monkeys? That it went ooze-fish-monkeys-man? Really?”) and then on to religion (“I’m not one of those crazy people, but religion has done more to disprove science than science has to prove evolution”). He noted at one point that he got a concussion in that hit-and-run last week. I nodded.
Eventually our friend — who would not let me take his picture sadly, because I believe that by that time he realized (a) I was a writer; and (b) I was taking mental notes — mentioned that three women were coming to meet him there and implied that, if we played our cards right, maybe Connor and I could get lucky.
I figured that was his tallest tale of the evening but I’ll be damned if three women didn’t eventually show up. One had a boyfriend with her. None of them seemed like people who would hang out with our friend, here. Indeed, when he went to use the restroom, one of the women said that she didn’t know the guy’s name and that they just call him “the guy who got hit by the car.” I am still unclear on why they would all meet him out at a bar.
I was likewise unclear why I was still talking to him, but eventually he disappeared into the night. I’m still not 100% certain that he existed. It’s possible someone spiked my Double-Double animal style or slipped a mickey into Moose Drool brown ale. But if he did exist, just know that people like him walk the Earth. Well, sort of stagger the Earth, but still.
Freakin’ Arizona. Drink here at your peril. Or maybe just don’t go out with Connor Doyle, because for as great a guy as he is, he seems to attract the weird ones.
Back to baseball this morning. I’m heading to the Peoria Sports Complex where I will witness the debut of Yu Darvish. A man who, until last night, I figured would be the most interesting person I’d meet in Spring Training.
Reports from the ballpark later, my friends.
Apr 19, 2015, 4:53 PM EDT
“Counting games in St. Louis since the start of the 2003 season, the Reds are 3-29-2 in series against the Cardinals.”
Apr 19, 2015, 4:17 PM EDT
The 26-year-old d’Arnaud had a terrific second half last season for New York and he was off to a very promising start in 2015, hitting .317/.356/.537 with two home runs and 10 RBI in 11 games played.
Apr 19, 2015, 4:01 PM EDT
Brutal news here for the NL East-leading Mets.
Apr 19, 2015, 3:34 PM EDT
Jon Lester appears to have found a solution for his problems making throws to first base …
Apr 19, 2015, 2:52 PM EDT
And why should it?
Apr 19, 2015, 2:05 PM EDT
There’s so much gold in this new Red Bull spot for Cubs rookie third baseman Kris Bryant …
Apr 19, 2015, 1:30 PM EDT
Puig, who boasts an .886 through 34 plate appearances, is considered day-to-day.
Apr 19, 2015, 12:41 PM EDT
Carrasco was lucky to avoid a serious injury. These reschedulings seem to be completely precautionary.
Apr 19, 2015, 11:57 AM EDT
Span underwent surgery for a sports hernia in December and then needed a followup procedure for a core muscle injury in early March.
Apr 19, 2015, 11:04 AM EDT
It’s been a rough first couple of weeks for the 2015 Giants, who sit in last place in the National League West with a record of 4-9 and a -21 run differential. But they got to do some celebrating Saturday night …
Apr 19, 2015, 10:18 AM EDT
This will be the first start for Richards since he tore the patellar tendon in his left knee last August in Boston.
Apr 19, 2015, 9:25 AM EDT
Jason Heyward hit his first home run as a member of the Cardinals on Saturday in St. Louis …
Apr 19, 2015, 8:33 AM EDT
Mark down seven straight wins for the Mets, who will try for a four-game Citi Field sweep of the Marlins on Sunday afternoon behind staff ace Matt Harvey.
Apr 18, 2015, 11:26 PM EDT
Grant Balfour was designated for assignment following a disastrous Saturday night against the Yankees.
Apr 18, 2015, 11:01 PM EDT
Joe Nathan could be activated from the disabled list as soon as Wednesday.
Apr 18, 2015, 10:00 PM EDT
If you’re in the mood for a laugh, you’ll want to read this story involving Indians manager Terry Francona and his dad Tito.
Apr 18, 2015, 9:10 PM EDT
Kris Bryant, one of baseball’s top prospects, earned his first major league hit and RBI on Saturday afternoon against the Padres.
Apr 18, 2015, 8:16 PM EDT
More drama involving the Athletics and Royals.
Apr 18, 2015, 7:45 PM EDT
Did Brett Lawrie apologize to Alcides Escobar for his hard slide in Friday’s game between the Athletics and Royals? We’re not sure.
Apr 18, 2015, 6:55 PM EDT
Ryan Braun will lead off for the first time in his career in Saturday’s game against the Pirates.
- Another one bites the dust: Mets lose young catcher Travis d’Arnaud to fractured right hand 6
- National League GM says Phillies’ asking price for Cole Hamels hasn’t dropped “one bit” 7
- Giants receive their 2014 World Series championship rings 19
- Angels activate Garrett Richards for Sunday debut 2
- Settling the Score: Saturday’s results 38
- Video: Watch Kris Bryant get his first major league hit and RBI 12
- Yordano Ventura ejected for hitting Brett Lawrie with a pitch 38
- Pete Rose joins FOX as a baseball analyst 25
- The Commissioner’s Office thinks that the Angels could indeed go after Josh Hamilton under his contract (153)
- “Why Ted Cruz is like the Atlanta Braves” (150)
- “We no longer need the terrorists. We’re now so good at terrorizing ourselves.” (143)
- Another argument in favor of making the DH universal (127)
- When it comes to Josh Hamilton, Arte Moreno is a craven opportunist, not a “smart businessman” (116)