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Help name the Marlins Park home run feature

Apr 17, 2012, 10:00 AM EDT

Houston Astros v Miami Marlins Getty Images

Our Old Gator has taken to calling the Marlins Park home run feature “Tommy,” in tribute to the Who’s rock opera (or, more likely, in tribute to the garish film version of it).  But Dave George of the Palm Beach Post is looking to formalize it a bit more:

I’m asking the creative and the cranky out there to submit potential nicknames for the merry monster of Marlins Park. The best suggestions will be mentioned in an upcoming column so don’t forget to include your name and city for proper credit.

Let me hear from you by e-mailing me, sending a letter to The Palm Beach Post at P.O. Box 24700, West Palm Beach, Fla., 33416-4700.

I’d write in with “Fidel” or something, but that would probably lead to me having to offer a tearful apology and finding myself suspended for five days.  The rest of you can just do your best. Or, preferably, your worst.

  1. contraryguy - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:05 AM

    The a-Bomb-ination.

    • ajcardsfan - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:29 AM

      I think that would be the winner, but I think I’d go with:
      “Paradise purposely lost”

    • phukyouk - Apr 17, 2012 at 11:33 AM

      “The Castro” We all hate it but we admire how long its survived so far.

      • ajcardsfan - Apr 17, 2012 at 12:20 PM

        Ozzie Guillen approves

    • hank10 - Apr 17, 2012 at 12:31 PM

      And if we’re lucky, The Hulk drops in and destroys it.

  2. gilbert718 - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:07 AM

    The dumb water shooting fish ferris wheel.

  3. yankeesfanlen - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:09 AM

    “Tropical Carousel Of Horrors” = probably too close to Tropicana Dome
    How about “Havana and Mardi Gras Merge in Macondo”

    • Jonny 5 - Apr 17, 2012 at 11:04 AM

      Electric Lady land! It’s made of pastel colors and reminds you of a psychedelic mushroom trip from days past. What fits better than Electric Lady land?

  4. illcomm - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:10 AM

    Ritma Palooza. its trademarked already but fits well.

  5. mybrunoblog - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:11 AM

    We can always just call it the same name we give for that material that ends up in your toilet after eating a huge meal.

  6. illcomm - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:12 AM

    loose translation is rythym megaparty.

  7. b7p19 - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:15 AM

    I don’t know what name Mr. George will eventually settle on, but I will continue to call it AWESOME. Love that thing.

  8. Francisco (FC) - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:18 AM

    Bob.

  9. RedHeadedBastard - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:22 AM

    The Gates of Hell

    • spindervish - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:57 AM

      That’s excellent.

      Big ups to Rodin yo.

  10. TheNaturalMevs - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:24 AM

    “Giancarlo’s Whip”

  11. SmackSaw - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:27 AM

    Homergasim

  12. angrycorgi - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:29 AM

    Call it “Menstruation” — it’s that uncomfortable experience that maybe goes off once a month…

  13. ss - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:30 AM

    “Loria’s Erection”

  14. hasbeen5 - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:31 AM

    LSDeep

  15. Gamera the Brave - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:32 AM

    The “Hello Dali!”

  16. Gamera the Brave - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:33 AM

    Or, “TheUglyThingInCenterThatShouldHaveGottenSomeoneInMarketingFired”

  17. lar @ wezen-ball - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:37 AM

    It’s la máquina jonrón and nothing else for me.

    • southbeachtalent - Apr 17, 2012 at 11:57 AM

      Like that one!

  18. sjhaack - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:41 AM

    The Dinger Machine.

    What it is and always will be.

    • dangle13x - Apr 17, 2012 at 11:18 AM

      ha is that really what it’s being called? I’m all for this one.

  19. phukyouk - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:42 AM

    “all your HR’s are belong to us”

    • dangle13x - Apr 17, 2012 at 11:19 AM

      No that would be funny for a machine made in 1998.

  20. farvefromover - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:49 AM

    the panty dropper

  21. thephilsabide - Apr 17, 2012 at 10:57 AM

    “The Longball Acid Trip”

  22. denodetroit - Apr 17, 2012 at 11:02 AM

    The Bomb bat stick Marlinomatic

  23. brianjvac - Apr 17, 2012 at 11:17 AM

    Jimmy Buffet’s Margarita-ville Contraption – it could be yours for $50,000.

  24. leerosenthall - Apr 17, 2012 at 11:18 AM

    Oompa Loompa Palooza!

    All it’s missing (aside from any discernible references to baseball) is Ozzie Guillen dressed up like Deep Roy:

    http://annao10.tripod.com/imagelib/sitebuilder/misc/show_image.html?linkedwidth=actual&linkpath=http://annao10.tripod.com/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/catcf_deep_roy_as_an_oompa_loompa.jpg&target=tlx_new

  25. The Dangerous Mabry - Apr 17, 2012 at 11:24 AM

    “Taxpayers’ Folly”

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