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When small children attack

Apr 19, 2012, 4:30 PM EDT

I don’t have the game on, but WhiteSoxTalk is at U.S. Cellular Field, and witnessed a blatant case of criminality perpetrated on our national pastime at the Orioles-White Sox game:


Here’s the video:


Lucky that kid wasn’t in Philly. I can’t imagine what they would have done to him.  At least we know they wouldn’t have hit him anyway. They can’t hit crap right now.

  1. Old Gator - Apr 19, 2012 at 4:33 PM

    Children are horrible.

    • sasquash20 - Apr 19, 2012 at 4:57 PM

      Your horrible.

      • jasonc2300 - Apr 19, 2012 at 5:06 PM

        Your horrible what?

    • WhenMattStairsIsKing - Apr 19, 2012 at 5:09 PM

      Gator! Come on man! I know you’re supposed to be old and crotchety, but really now.

      • Old Gator - Apr 19, 2012 at 5:58 PM

        Eh? What? What’s that you say, sonny?

    • racksie - Apr 19, 2012 at 6:50 PM

      Didn’t you mean “GET OFF OF MY LAWN!” ???

    • skids003 - Apr 20, 2012 at 8:18 AM

      I hope they ejected his parents, but I doubt it. Mine didn’t act like alot of them I see nowadays. Not everyone thinks YOUR kids are cute. I’m somewhat with you Gator.

  2. ajcardsfan - Apr 19, 2012 at 4:39 PM

    “At least we know they wouldn’t have hit him anyway. They can’t crap right now.”
    What’s being constipated have to do with not being able to hit something? If it is interfering, it brings a whole new meaning to the prhase “pre-game dump”.

    • ajcardsfan - Apr 19, 2012 at 4:40 PM


    • phukyouk - Apr 19, 2012 at 4:44 PM

      This is one of craigs best typos ever.
      Craig – PLEASE DONT FIX IT. Its so much funnier and since its for trolling purposes anyway there is no good reason to.

  3. unlost1 - Apr 19, 2012 at 4:40 PM

    you are more bored than me at work

  4. philsbirdsflyers - Apr 19, 2012 at 4:57 PM

    Classic Calcaterra “article” – irrelevance followed by unsuccessful attempts at humor.

    • Craig Calcaterra - Apr 19, 2012 at 4:58 PM

      I think it’s funny that people like you only get mad when someone messes with Philly. I’m sure it has everything to do with your objective feelings about the quality of the work, however, and nothing to do with you being all sad that people are messing with Philly.

      • phukyouk - Apr 19, 2012 at 5:00 PM

        Leave him alone craig.. he hasn’t taken his ex-lax yet…..

      • philsbirdsflyers - Apr 19, 2012 at 5:03 PM

        Fair but not entirely true. I’m a Phillies fan and admittedly don’t read all too many articles on other MLB teams; therefore, “only get made when someone messes with Philly” only reflects that fact. The poor attempts at humor is simply opinion – I find most every writer on the pro football/hardball/hockey talk more humorous.

      • Old Gator - Apr 19, 2012 at 6:00 PM

        I don’t blame you for feeling that way – Craig’s the only one of them who can spell and punctuate correctly, so naturally that eliminates some obvious sources of humor in the writings of the other ones.

    • Utley's Hair - Apr 19, 2012 at 5:40 PM

      Man, lighten up.

      Last night was brutal, but the Flyboys will take it tomorrow in Pittsburgh. Besides, it’s true—the Phils can’t hit right now.

      • phukyouk - Apr 19, 2012 at 5:52 PM

        Ahhh but can they sh*t? And if so would it be a horse sh*t or a horsesh*t?

    • bigharold - Apr 19, 2012 at 9:04 PM

      “… – irrelevance followed by unsuccessful attempts at humor.”

      Says You!

    • Jonny 5 - Apr 19, 2012 at 9:58 PM

      Who said he was trying to be funny? Maybe he was just being truthful? The Phillies haven’t been hitting worth a damn.

    • Gordon - Apr 19, 2012 at 10:01 PM

      At least he didn’t say that Philly fans would have vomited on the kid. That would be unfair.

      • motherscratcher23 - Apr 20, 2012 at 3:57 PM

        And besides, vomiting on a kid that’s just been tazed would probably be overkill, even in Philly.

  5. phukyouk - Apr 19, 2012 at 5:00 PM

    you fixed it 😦

  6. jwbiii - Apr 19, 2012 at 5:03 PM

    Kids these days. Don’t they know they’re supposed attack the opposing team’s coaches?

    • bigharold - Apr 19, 2012 at 9:05 PM

      If there’s any justice in the universe the red neck clowns are just getting out of jail.

      • jwbiii - Apr 20, 2012 at 2:05 AM

        Ligue père was fired a few years ago from his job as a pizza delivery man. There was a car parked in the delivery space in the lot, so of course he keyed it. It was the owner’s car.

  7. Loose Changeup - Apr 19, 2012 at 5:21 PM

    Will he get banned for life from The Cell?

  8. mdpickles - Apr 19, 2012 at 5:21 PM

    You can’t blame the kid, he was watching the White Sox and Orioles play. He probably thought he could do better than the guys on the field.

  9. whatthehellisansky - Apr 19, 2012 at 5:30 PM

    “Whats the fine – a couple Oreos?” HAHAHHAHAAHA laughed my ass off

  10. jwp88 - Apr 19, 2012 at 5:38 PM

    unecessary philly reference.

    • sasquash20 - Apr 19, 2012 at 6:24 PM

      They love pushing our Philly buttons. It is all good your hate only makes us stronger!

      • Old Gator - Apr 19, 2012 at 8:08 PM

        it certainly isn’t improving your spelling or punctuation, though. Maybe we should try a little love?

  11. schlom - Apr 19, 2012 at 5:56 PM

    I’ll bet if they tased him fans at the Cell would think twice about running onto the field.

  12. randygnyc - Apr 19, 2012 at 6:18 PM

    I watched it on I had the 3 other games on too. The volume was on a different game. I just saw the kid scooped up and carried into the stands. I thought it was a cutaway to a coach and his kid. Couldn’t get the damn thing to rewind, cause I knew something was “off”.

  13. mariner425 - Apr 19, 2012 at 7:06 PM

    At least his dad didn’t join him on field to attack one of the base coaches.

  14. atworkident - Apr 20, 2012 at 8:08 AM

    They should have tazered him.

    At a minimum his guardian for the game should spend a night in jail.

  15. dennisund - Apr 20, 2012 at 10:16 AM

    If a kid ran out on the field at Atlanta’s ballpark but no one was there to see it, did it happen?

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