Jun 8, 2012, 11:33 AM EST
I saw that guys named Skye Bolt and Storm Throne were selected in the Rule 4 draft earlier this week. When I saw them my first thought was “Storm Throne rolls saving throw for curve balls …” But there were more ridiculous names than that! And Dayn Perry of CBS Sports.com catalogs them for us today:
5. Evan Van Hoosier, Phillies (818th overall)
Sounds like: Monarchical heir to the throne of Indiana …
8. Damien Magnifico, Brewers (185th overall)
Sounds like: Up-and-coming celebrity illusionist.
And there are 23 more fabulous ones. But I disagree with Dayn on one of them. “Correlle Prime” does not sound like a software upgrade. It sounds like a planet where Galactica mined for tylium or the crew of the Enterprise encountered a race of aliens who had problems that were, amazingly, allegorical to some 1960s social problem or something.
- Ian Kinsler hopes Rangers go 0-162, calls GM a “sleazeball” (132)
- Albert Pujols was insulted when someone asked him if he can put up Mike Trout numbers (101)
- The politics of “The Cardinal Way” (67)
- Robinson Cano wants the Mariners to bring in Kendrys Morales and Ervin Santana (64)
- Reporter calls Ian Kinsler as self-absorbed as A-Rod (60)