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And That Happened: Classic!

Jul 10, 2012, 5:40 AM EDT

Reggie Billy

Note: due to the All-Star break, we now bring you a special “Classic” version of “And That Happened.” The following originally ran on July 10, 1977

Orioles 6, Yankees 5:  Reggie Jackson went 1 for 3 with an RBI double, but that wasn’t good enough for manager Billy Martin, who tried to physically attack Jackson after the game was over. That keeps a seventeen-game assaulting-Reggie Jackson-streak alive for the Yankee skipper.

Indians 3, Blue Jays 2: This game was delayed for nearly an hour when the home plate umpire’s CB radio malfunctioned. I suppose they could have tried to play without it, but in this day and age, modern technology is just a part of the game and those anti-citizen band people are just trying to deny progress.

Mets 7, Expos 5: This game went 17 innings and ended when Lenny Randle hit a game ending homer. It was only the second most notable hit he’s had all year.

Athletics 7, Royals 1: The game was pretty dismal for Kansas City, but shortstop Freddie Patek did have a great play at short. We have no means of showing you a videotaped recreation of the play, but check out the frame-by-frame photo of it.

Brewers 3, Red Sox 2: The winning run scored when Steve Dillard booted one at second base in the eighth inning. He later explained that the “demons” in his neighbor’s dog that “made him do it,” and has re-christened himself “the Son of Steve.”

White Sox 5, Tigers 2Cardinals 4, Cubs 3: One Chicago team wins and the other loses, but they both remain atop their respective divisions. At this point — exactly 81 games into the season — I think it’s safe to say that the long suffering of Chicago baseball fans is going to end this year, be it from a championship by the Cubs or the Sox.

Mariners 5, Twins 2: Dick Pole gets the win over David Goltz. Jeez, what a name. “Goltz.” I mean, really.

Rangers 7, Angels 2: With the loss, the Angels fall nine and a half back of the division leading White Sox. And there is no future, In California’s dreaming. No future, no future, No future for you, No future, no future, No future for me,  No future, no future, No future for you, No future, no future, For youuuuuuuuu.

Reds 3, Astros 1: Tom Seaver gets the win, allowing only one run in this complete game. It’s been less than a month since the Mets traded him to Cincinnati, but one can already tell that this is going to be the worst personnel move since Larry Linville left M*A*S*H.

Padres 2, Dodgers 1: A beautiful night in Southern California. From the game story:

It’s so clean out here. That’s because they don’t throw their garbage away, they turn it into television shows. I don’t want to move to a city where the only cultural advantage is being able to make a right turn on a red light.

Giants 5, Braves 4: This loss puts the Braves 25 and a half games back in the NL West. Look, I’ve argued this one to death, but at the risk of continuing to do it, I will simply once again note that when Ted Turner managed the team back on May 11, they were only 15 and a half back. You can’t argue the numbers. Bring Ted back!

Pirates 9, Phillies 8: Davey Johnson went 3 for 5 and drove in five. He was hotter than the Beverly Hills Supper Club fire out there! Ooh, sorry. Too soon?

  1. personalspaceinvader - Jul 10, 2012 at 6:32 AM

    Papa Craig, who were the Expos?

  2. Innocent Bystander - Jul 10, 2012 at 6:58 AM

    Yes! Love a ATH classic!

  3. sdelmonte - Jul 10, 2012 at 7:09 AM

    It’s a shame that we never hear from Reggie Jackson anymore. I wonder what became of him.

  4. pigskinflix - Jul 10, 2012 at 7:28 AM

    Hotter than the Beverly Hills Supper Club fire, what a sense of humor, you should do something on 9/11 in 2036. Next time have someone edit your creative impulses or just enjoy the ASG break.

    • Craig Calcaterra - Jul 10, 2012 at 7:51 AM

      Yes, because a fire that killed 165 people and absolutely no one remembers is the same as 9/11.

      • dontcarewhatusay - Jul 10, 2012 at 1:20 PM

        Wonder if Craig would think that “Hotter than a Auschwitz oven” would be funny, too….

      • mortymcfearson - Jul 10, 2012 at 3:59 PM

        I remember, but it happened near Cincinnati (instead of Philly or Pittsburgh). So maybe tying in a little 9/11 joke for, say, Denver, would work.

    • Old Gator - Jul 10, 2012 at 7:52 AM

      Repress Craig and I’ll fill in with a bunch of Helen Keller jokes. Then we’ll see how you like that.

      • stex52 - Jul 10, 2012 at 12:15 PM

        They’ll be doing 9/11 jokes soon enough. Just wait around a little more.

    • Old Gator - Jul 10, 2012 at 7:55 AM

      Maybe the Triangle Shirt Waste fire would have been more appropriate. Conservatives love that one because the workers were non-union.

      • bigharold - Jul 10, 2012 at 8:21 AM

        And, mostly immigrants too!

      • yahmule - Jul 10, 2012 at 11:16 AM

        And women!

      • Old Gator - Jul 10, 2012 at 12:32 PM

        Well, that’s why Islamists liked it. They were honor fryings.

  5. lyon810 - Jul 10, 2012 at 7:31 AM

    Never thought I’d see my beloved Expos in one of these…kind of heartbreaking

    • Old Gator - Jul 10, 2012 at 7:53 AM

      Come down to Macondo. I can show you someone who strongly resembles security camera images of the suspected killer.

      • proudlycanadian - Jul 10, 2012 at 8:21 AM

        Some of us would be strongly tempted to puke poutine all over Scrooge McLoria.

      • Old Gator - Jul 10, 2012 at 9:09 AM

        That’s OK – I would hate to see a perfectly good smoked meat sandwich go to waste, though.

    • cur68 - Jul 10, 2012 at 11:05 AM

      Pity it had to be a loss, but I thought the same thing. Brings a tear to my eye just seeing them mentioned on here.

  6. bigharold - Jul 10, 2012 at 8:25 AM

    Leave Reggie out of this, .. he’s had a tough week already. Of course it was his own big mouth that got him into trouble but nonetheless, leave him be.

    A psyche as fragile as Reggie needs to be nurtured and protected.

    • Old Gator - Jul 10, 2012 at 12:34 PM

      Sometimes, yes. At other times, a psyche like that needs to be taken out into the alley behind the bar and have the living shit beaten out of it. The goal is to find the balance.

  7. nategearhart - Jul 10, 2012 at 8:41 AM

    Patek had the moves.

  8. stex52 - Jul 10, 2012 at 8:43 AM

    WoW! Annie Hall, Supper Club Fire, Son of Sam, Sex Pistols, CB radios! I feel the need to go slip into some disco duds and boogie! Thanks for reminding me why it is nice to be past the ’70’s.

    BTW, you must have been up all night on that one, Craig. I figure you were about 5 in 1977.

    • Old Gator - Jul 10, 2012 at 9:11 AM

      Tex, what you need to do is order the complete set of The Bronx is Burning and relive that entire season from the inside out. Great film, great performances – John Turturro as Billy Martin alone is worth the price of the rental, and then some….

      • stex52 - Jul 10, 2012 at 9:24 AM

        You’re right. I just googled it. I didn’t even remember when that one came through.

        Need to see it.

      • Old Gator - Jul 10, 2012 at 12:37 PM

        With the emphasis on need. And wait’ll you see the guys who play Reggie and Munson. They look more like them than Reggie and Munson did.

        And Oliver Platt, even though slightly miscast, made up for it with sheer panache. He was a total hoot as Da Boss.

      • stex52 - Jul 10, 2012 at 1:35 PM

        No surprise. I would think Oliver Platt would eat up that role.

  9. steveohho - Jul 10, 2012 at 8:48 AM

    Reggie reportedly said to Billy in that picture, “hey Billy, only a jackass would have pinch hit Dave Kingman for Chris Chambliss. For Chris sakes your killing us!”

  10. ajcardsfan - Jul 10, 2012 at 9:05 AM

    Hurry, somebody find a Ham radio, create an aurora borealis, and contact the manager at the Buchanan South substation and warn him of that disaster that will take place in 3 days!

  11. yahmule - Jul 10, 2012 at 9:13 AM

    Billy Martin’s best quote, when talking about Reggie Jackson and George Steinbrenner, “One’s a born liar and the other’s convicted”.

    In truth, you could hardly find three people who deserved one another more.

  12. nolanwiffle - Jul 10, 2012 at 9:16 AM

    Sure….I know both the Yanks and Dodgers lost today, but I just got a good felling about these two clubs. I’d lay a fat wager on it too…. if I only knew a good bookie in the greater Cincinnati area.

  13. thefalcon123 - Jul 10, 2012 at 9:25 AM

    “Lucchesi was hospitalized for a week, needing plastic surgery to repair his fractured cheekbone which Randle had broken in three places. He also received bruises to his kidney and back. The Rangers suspended Randle for 30 days without pay and fined him $10,000.”

    A more quaint time in America, when landing punching your boss so hard he ended spending a week in the hospital and needing plastic surgery only netted you a 30 day suspension.

  14. number42is1 - Jul 10, 2012 at 9:26 AM

    I’m giving odds on the Cubbies winning it all! just call KL5-0123

  15. Francisco (FC) - Jul 10, 2012 at 11:14 AM

    Craig’s finger moved down the box scores on the paper until he found what he wanted. He sat up and immediately started pulling his hair! Another Loss! Six in a row! Twenty-Five and a half games back (not sure what that half meant), oh will he ever see the Braves stop sucking in his (admittedly short so far) lifetime? Craig adjusted his Batman PJs as he sat crossed legged to ponder this problem. As he usually did he took out his bubble bottle, pulling the plastic ring and absentmindedly blowing a few. Maybe Phil Niekro can pitch all the rest of the Braves’s games? But they still have hitting problems… and fielding problems…and-

    “CRAIG! Are you dressed yet! We’re late for your soccer practice!” a voice boomed from afar.

    Craig pouted. “But MOOOOOOOM!”

    “Don’t ‘but Mom’ me, get out of that basement and get dressed this instance!”

    Craig turned to his homegrown paper-mache bobblehead of Hank Aaron. “Hank we need your help. Come back to the team!” he implored.

    [I’m pretty much off the reservation with this account but at some point fictional characters need to take a life of their own and stop being enslaved to their inspiration]

    • Old Gator - Jul 10, 2012 at 12:38 PM

      You know, Francisco, you ought to be collecting all of these Young Shyster domestic vignettes into a single, full length digital volume. Kindle beckons.

      I can also hook you up with a cartoonist….

      • Francisco (FC) - Jul 10, 2012 at 3:22 PM

        Cartoonist would be awesome. I’ll move this particular post later to the blog.

      • Reflex - Jul 10, 2012 at 11:13 PM

        If you need help with the Kindle portion of it, let me know. I’m involved with the platform for a living..

  16. bluesoxbaseball - Jul 10, 2012 at 12:25 PM

    I love that the Randle home run was not called a “walk-off.”

    • Old Gator - Jul 10, 2012 at 12:40 PM

      That’s because Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson weren’t born yet.

      (Don’t bother checking the calendar. This was an alternative universe remark.)

  17. sometimesimisscandlestick - Jul 10, 2012 at 12:38 PM

    Hey, I was at that Giants/Braves game! And box seats were only $4.50 too.

  18. natstowngreg - Jul 10, 2012 at 12:43 PM

    No Major League Baseball was played in the Nation’s Capital. Neither was any played by any team representing the Nation’s Capital.

    Some local fans cheered on Earl Weaver’s Orioles as they defeated the defending AL champion Yankees at Memorial Stadium, moving to 10 games over .500..

  19. kevinbnyc - Jul 10, 2012 at 12:56 PM

    I really wanted to see Gator, undeterred by their lack of existence, put up a comment about the Marlins inept performance.

    • Old Gator - Jul 10, 2012 at 3:40 PM

      Why not? When you look at it from a certain angle, we’ve all overcome our prior lack of existence just to show up here, haven’t we?

  20. pigskinflix - Jul 10, 2012 at 1:35 PM

    I stand corrected, 165 people burning to death is much better comedy fodder than 2800+ people being slaughtered by extremists. Especially if nobody remembers it anyway. Yeah, that’s a good defense. Besides, dying is easy, comedy is hard.

    • Old Gator - Jul 10, 2012 at 3:41 PM

      Edmund Kean. Very nice – as quoted by the great Peter O’Toole in My Favorite Year.

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