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Fausto Carmona/Roberto Hernandez gets three birthday cakes from the Indians

Jul 23, 2012, 12:31 PM EDT

Let no one say that the Cleveland Indians don’t have a sense of humor.

Roberto Hernandez, who used to be known as Fausto Carmona, returned to the Indians yesterday after spending months in the Dominican Republic trying to get a visa in the wake of his identity fraud beef.  And, in welcoming him back, his teammates gave him a birthday party. Never mind that his birthday isn’t for another month:

That’s three cakes: One for the 29 year-old Fausto Carmona, another for 30 year-old Fausto Carmona, and one for the 31 year-old Roberto Hernandez.

I lol’d.

  1. dondada10 - Jul 23, 2012 at 12:38 PM

    Next headline is going to be that Roberto Hernandez was placed on the Disabled List after receiving hundreds of birthday punches.

  2. El Bravo - Jul 23, 2012 at 12:50 PM

    Now that is funny.

  3. lrak76 - Jul 23, 2012 at 12:59 PM

    Isn’t visa fraud hilarious?

    • Ben - Jul 23, 2012 at 1:24 PM

      Turns out, yes.

    • DJ MC - Jul 23, 2012 at 2:12 PM

      Leave whatever funny business you do with your credit cards out of this.

  4. ajcardsfan - Jul 23, 2012 at 1:04 PM

    One of these cakes is not like the other, one of these cakes is true

    • churchoftheperpetuallyoutraged - Jul 23, 2012 at 1:12 PM

      The cake is a lie!

      • ajcardsfan - Jul 23, 2012 at 1:14 PM

        Thought about that one, but can’t use it in this scenario, because it would have to be “The cakes are a lie…but one of them isn’t”

      • El Bravo - Jul 23, 2012 at 1:33 PM

        Truth only comes in pie form. All else is false like those who pray to the false gods of cake.

  5. cur68 - Jul 23, 2012 at 1:17 PM

    This is why cake is superior. Cake is appropriate in all circumstances. What pie could possibly be used for a triple whammy birthday-fraud? Huh? NONE. Pie isn’t versatile enough. Cake baby. Cake all the way.

    • El Bravo - Jul 23, 2012 at 1:34 PM

      not versatile enough? pizza pie has more varieties by itself than cake can wish to have. don’t get me started, cur.

      • cur68 - Jul 23, 2012 at 1:37 PM

        Pizza isn’t a pie. Not gross enough for starters. I mean what pizza has goo for innards? NONE. Cake > pie in every way and pizza ≠ pie in any way.

      • El Bravo - Jul 23, 2012 at 1:44 PM

        Except of course that everyone on the planet refers to it as pizza pie b/c that’s amore. You keep trying to define pie, but that’s like me defining cake. Your argument lacks foundation and credibility. I move to strike Cur’s testimony.

      • cur68 - Jul 23, 2012 at 1:51 PM

        Only Americans call it “pizza pie” -spits- and not even all of you do, either. Just the mental ones. Thus you are overruled. Your argument is specious and defamatory. I move that you be disbarred.

      • El Bravo - Jul 23, 2012 at 1:59 PM

        Objection: hearsay.

  6. kevinbnyc - Jul 23, 2012 at 1:23 PM

    I eat chocolate peanut butter pie for my birthday every year. With candles. It’s appropriate. Pie > cake.

    • sabatimus - Jul 23, 2012 at 1:54 PM

      Cake > pie, but chocolate peanut butter pie sounds hard to beat.

      • cur68 - Jul 23, 2012 at 1:56 PM

        Agree, but I could beat chocolate peanut butter pie. I’d use a 34oz Louisville Slugger. I’d beat the mo-fo outta that thing.

      • sabatimus - Jul 23, 2012 at 1:58 PM

        Cur68, I thought of the literal implications myself, but left it to others to go there :D

  7. rje49 - Jul 23, 2012 at 6:48 PM

    Don’t forget about Boston Cream Pie. Which is most definitely cake.

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