Lee came in as a stopgap measure – he was at the end of a contract, was going to be a free agent at the end of the season anyway, the Feesh gave up nothing for him and are only paying the prorated share of the league minimum for a guy who got off the plane and promptly put up seventy more points of average, drove in half as many runs in three weeks as Gaby did all season, and played a nice steady first base.

Since you imported Lee into this discussion as an irrelevant aside before, I guess you figured bringing Heath Bell into it might work better, it doesn’t, and until you learn how to read – I won’t hold my breath – all your idiotic rhetorical detours won’t work either. I didn’t at all say that Gaby’s collapse was the biggest or most important disaster of the season. That’s just you inability to look at a sentence and discern what it means. I said that his failure was the biggest mystery of them all to me – meaning, I was shocked that someone who seemed so talented once upon a time had so completely failed to live up to what I thought his abilities were. Big difference – but then, you’re not especially perceptive, apparently, so even big differences appear to elude you.

Go back to your queer eye for the straight guy marathon and leave the baseball talk to people who know what’s up.

1.) Do you know how to read a slash line? .202 /.250 /.306 /.556 with 3 homers and 17 – I repeat, 17 – RBI this season. If you can think of a kinder word than “ineffectual,” go ahead and find one.

2.) What does Lee have to do with it?

3.) By “paradise,” I was referring to Macondo, from which Gaby was sent into exile in the minors some weeks ago after establishing new personal standards for professional futility.

First, learn how to read. Next, learn how to read between the lines. Finally, learn the performance history of the players you’re commenting upon before displaying your ignorance so breezily. And finally, stick to commenting on subjects you actually know something about. American Idol. Sponge Bob. Smoochy, the Pink Rhinoceros, for example.

(Speaking of crazy, did Showtime cancel The Franchise after two episodes or will we get to see more of that hideous owner, his pathetic stepson and than certifiable manager?)

Considering what the Pirates gave up (nothing) and what the Marlins are now trying to do with Lee (waivers), I’d say it was Marlin mgmt that’s become “utterly ineffectual”

New Orleans = Paradise??? what you smoking? I’m sure any ballplayer would gladly swap a AAA ‘paradise’ for ANY MLB club.

Sanchez, a first baseman, has cratered this year,

Whenever we say a baseball player craters, I have this cartoonish vision of a such a guy dunk head-first into a crater on the baseball diamond up to his mid-section, legs up in disarray and a bunch of stars or tweeting birds hovering just above the player.