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The most predictable New York Daily News story ever

Aug 16, 2012, 3:23 PM EDT

I swear on a stack of Bibles that yesterday, while I was hanging around the NBC Sports Network studio watching Felix Hernandez polish off his perfect game, I said aloud that a New York paper was guaranteed to run the classic “the Yankees need to acquire King Felix” story today. I said that I’d bet my life on it.

And here it is:

source:

Extra bonus points for the “if the Boss was still alive …” angle, which means that this article combines two of the tabloids’ favorite tropes: (1) treating other teams as de facto members of the Yankees farm system; and (2) Boss deification.

Well played, Mr. Harper. Well played.

  1. Ralph - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:27 PM

    Oh dear god…I’m a Yankee fan and I hate shit like this.

    • banksatdixie - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:30 PM

      A-fucking-men.

    • clifford1212 - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:35 PM

      That’s funny. I am a fan of one of the other 31 teams in baseball, and I REALLY hate stories like this.

      • mianfr - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:47 PM

        How many?

      • clifford1212 - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:49 PM

        29. you get the point

    • bigleagues - Aug 16, 2012 at 6:12 PM

      Oh dear God . . . please no more “Dear God” one liners for a while.

      Played out.

  2. Marty - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:31 PM

    Hey, they’re entitled to the best.

    • redsoxfan75 - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:47 PM

      why are they and no other team entitled to the best ……..as per my name here yes im a red sox fan, but more than anything im a baseball fan……why not Pirates, why not Reds, or Cubs????? many yankee fans have this ” oh we are the best and screw everyone else ” !

    • klbader - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:48 PM

      They are not “entitled” to the best. They, and all other baseball teams, are entitled to make trades or sign free agents that will ultimately help the team. The Yankees, like all the other teams, can approach Seattle about a possible trade for King Felix, and the Mariners are entitled to decline the trade. Once Felix is a free agent, the Yankees are entitled to offer him a contract for his services, and the contract they offer, as a result of their resources, might be more than any other team offers. Of course, King Felix is entitled to turn down that offer and sign elsewhere.

      The Yankees often get the best, and that is part of major league baseball today, but they are certainly not “entitled” to the best.

      • 1baseballfan - Aug 16, 2012 at 4:16 PM

        ….and that’s exactly why the Yankees are reviled; not because they are smarter or plan better or have a better formula or do their homework better. No, the Yankees are reviled because they have disproportionate access to talent because their market is bigger. The playing field is not level which is great if you’re a Yankee fan and otherwise sucks until your team beats the Yankees despite their advantage.

      • kkolchak - Aug 16, 2012 at 4:41 PM

        It is no accident that the NFL, with its equal revenue sharing, is crushing MLB as fan attention and television ratings. The NY Giants won last year because they were smartly managed, not because they could buy all of the best players.

      • 1baseballfan - Aug 16, 2012 at 5:01 PM

        That’s an interesting idea. It would be worth looking at some measure of popularity (?) vs. year. The NFL instituted a salary cap (and floor) in 1994. My guess is the NFL had already passed baseball in poularity by then but …….

    • bigharold - Aug 16, 2012 at 5:58 PM

      “Hey, they’re entitled to the best.”

      Is anybody aware that this is a sarcastic remark? Moreover, that neither the Yankees nor their fans for that matter suggested this trade or the what they are entitled to?

      Every team would like to have Hernandez but because some NY reporter couldn’t come up with a better topic is no reason to get bat shit crazy about the Yankees.

    • Marty - Aug 16, 2012 at 6:11 PM

      /sarcasm

      Sorry.

      • 18thstreet - Aug 17, 2012 at 8:47 AM

        Hey, I got that it was sarcastic and still gave it a thumbs-down. It’s like booing a bad pun from your dad.

  3. istillbelieveinblue - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:31 PM

    He can’t become a free agent until 2015, and he’s currently playing under an affordable 5 yrs/$78M contract. No way the Yankees have the bullets to get a young, dominant pitcher, in his prime, that they would control through the 2015 season. I don’t think any team has the ammo to get him. Take a deep breath, Yankees fans, he’ll still be young and, most likely dominant in 2015.

    • Ralph - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:44 PM

      istillbelieveinblue, you don’t know how this works. All the Yankees need to do is tell Seattle that they want him, offer a couple of pitchers that project to be organizational guys along with maybe Jayson Nix and boom! Felix Hernandez is in pinstripes.

      You must be new to baseball…

      • Ralph - Aug 16, 2012 at 4:37 PM

        And as of 4:35 PM EDT, 7 people have their sarcasm filter set to “off”.

    • detroitr1 - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:57 PM

      Verlander recently raised some eyebrows in local Detroit media by stating in a recent interview that he was curious about pitching for New York…. for what it is worth…

      • henryd3rd - Aug 16, 2012 at 7:33 PM

        I’m a diehard Yankee fan and I don’t believe that one. Why would he want to leave Detroit? Leyland’s a great manager, Dave Dombrowski’s a great GM, Mike Ilitch’s a great owner, Comerica Park is a great ballpark and the city is crazy about the Tigers. No way!

  4. IdahoMariner - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:37 PM

    in order to “pass up a chance” to get Felix, there has to be a chance.

    He’s ours and you can’t have him. At least until his contract expires, and maybe not even then — he seems pretty happy here. I think he views our crappy offense as inspiration to do stuff like yesterday — he always has to pitch a near-perfect game if he wants to win. I would feel sorry for him, but he seems to thrive on it.

    another example of new york press myopia:
    on the radio after the game, shannon drayer was talking about how, after every game felix pitches in NY, the media asks him why he pitches so unbelievably well in NY. his answer is basically always the same, and true — he always pitches like that. It isn’t some magical new york thing.

    • brewcrewfan54 - Aug 16, 2012 at 4:40 PM

      Prince Fielder liked playing in Milwaukee also.

      • Reflex - Aug 17, 2012 at 2:05 AM

        So since you lost Fielder you now wish the same fate on the stars of other teams..?

        Lets try it with you: “Ryan Braun likes playing in Milwaukee also..”

      • pw38 - Aug 17, 2012 at 12:11 PM

        Yeah and he ended up signing with Detroit. Detroit is different from Milwaukee how?

  5. doctorfootball - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:41 PM

    Well, it could have been worse. It could have been Mike Lupica writing this story. And there are no worse writers or radio personalities than Lupica.

    • wendell7 - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:59 PM

      I give you Dan Shaughnessy

      • doctorfootball - Aug 16, 2012 at 4:18 PM

        He’s a Boston guy. Hating him is a given. But Lupica is a New York writer who hates new York teams. Even when a team is doing well, all Lupica does is criticize. Plus the fact that Lupica really is a terrible writer. His articles are a mishmash of discombobulating opinions and arrogant statements.

      • byjiminy - Aug 16, 2012 at 7:53 PM

        And his voice!

        Oh, dear God!

  6. theawesomersfranchise - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:42 PM

    Nationals, Rangers, O’s, Jays, D-Backs come to mind as teams with the juice to get a trade done with the Mariners. Not the Yankees

    • bmorelikeme - Aug 16, 2012 at 4:14 PM

      I love the O’s, but they have nowhere near the juice to get King Felix in Bmore

      • madhatternalice - Aug 16, 2012 at 4:34 PM

        Sure they do. You can’t tell me that if DD calls up Zduriencik and says, “Hey, we’re interested in Felix. Let’s talk about a package around Bundy,” that Zduriencik doesn’t listen.

        I don’t want this to happen, nor do I think it will happen. I’m just saying, there are pieces in the O’s system to have a conversation.

      • theawesomersfranchise - Aug 16, 2012 at 4:49 PM

        Macho and Bundy, what are the Mariners going to add to make the O’s say yes?

  7. shaggylocks - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:44 PM

    As soon as Felix threw the last pitch of that game, I’m sure the Daily News sports editor was looking over his list of writers to decide who to assign this story too. John Harper was probably annoyed when he pulled the job, but he was at least able to plug the relevant names into a well-worn story template, so that was at least some small compensation.

  8. yankees177 - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:48 PM

    Yeah Ms fans hes yours we cant have him. Youre tired of all the media always on this story and insinuating how the yankees could get him if they wanted to , i understand. Bottom line is your team is absolute garbage so hold on to the one bright spot you have and take him down with you. He wins despite your teams ineptness and some how likes a city with no shot at putting him in the playoffs any time soon. You win Ms you win. Happy now? Being 1st or having a shot at being in 1st in my division makes me happy.

  9. bbil2012 - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:55 PM

    Since King Felix doesn’t play for the Kansas City Athletics a trade won’t be as simple as Harper thinks it’ll be.

  10. bigleagues - Aug 16, 2012 at 3:56 PM

    Also, it’s proof positive that it’s not your Father’s MLB anymore . . . most teams are actually able to retain and pay their star players these days. And The King isn’t just a star . . . he’s the best alive. So WHY would the M’s want to go back and revisit the Griffey and A-Rod trade days with the likes of Hernandez?

    • GoneYickitty - Aug 16, 2012 at 6:18 PM

      Let’s not get carried away. He’s towards the top of the list but he’s not the guy I pick first overall to build my franchise around.

      • bigleagues - Aug 16, 2012 at 6:33 PM

        OH? And who would that be?

        Please, who is substantially (subjectively or objectively) better than Felix?

        Verlander? OK.

        I still prefer the guy who is 3 years younger and who has been just as good between Ages 23-26 as Verlander has been from Ages 26-29.

        If not Verlander . . . who?

      • Ben - Aug 16, 2012 at 8:12 PM

        Kershaw or Strasburg.

  11. danrizzle - Aug 16, 2012 at 4:20 PM

    He’s right! When the Boss was alive the Yankees always got their guy. I’ll never forget the feeling I had as a young lad in 1992 / 1993 when the Yankees signed Greg Maddux, Doug Drabek and David Cone to boost the rotation, and then turned around and signed Barry Bonds to bat cleanup.

  12. bgeary8 - Aug 16, 2012 at 4:34 PM

    At what point did it become acceptable for a writer to sit down, spew out 16 one-sentence paragraphs, and call it a day?

    • churchoftheperpetuallyoutraged - Aug 16, 2012 at 5:11 PM

      it’s called pulling a Plaschke, and he’s been doing it for probably 10+ years.

      • kkolchak - Aug 16, 2012 at 6:25 PM

        Better than Kornholeheiser and Wiltampbon…they don’t even bother writing anymore.

  13. randygnyc - Aug 16, 2012 at 6:45 PM

    If Felix wants to have a legacy, outside of a few personal accomplishments, he ought to demand a trade to NY. The Yankees are his only ticket to immortality. Harper wasn’t wrong.

    • crackersnap - Aug 16, 2012 at 10:54 PM

      Hank Aaron says STFU. Right behind him in line is Ted Williams. Then Stan Musial…Ty Cobb…Bob Feller…Brooks Robinson…Roberto Clemente…

    • pw38 - Aug 17, 2012 at 12:22 PM

      Correction: He can win elsewhere. He will be immortalized regardless. The only thing coming to the Yankees does is fulfill your fantasy as a Yankee fan, nothing more. You prove yet again why people dislike Yankee fans so much. Go ahead and make a “27” comment to make yourself feel better.

  14. rooney24 - Aug 16, 2012 at 7:22 PM

    I work with a Yankee fan. When ARod was first injured, he said that they should go get “that 3rd baseman from the Rangers”. That’s right, they should just go get Adrian Beltre, because a team in the playoff hunt would give up their All Star, Gold Glove player just because the Yankees called. Just gave me further insight into Yankee fan mentality. Someone saying they should just get King Felix isn’t much different.

    • pw38 - Aug 17, 2012 at 12:24 PM

      I’m pretty sure he was refering to Mike Olt not Adrian Beltre. Not like it would have made any difference but I doubt he was thinking of Beltre.

  15. cackalackyank - Aug 16, 2012 at 7:31 PM

    Sorry, I am a Yankee fan, and maybe my sarcasm filter is “off”, but there are 5 or 6 other teams (mostly NL) that could give Felix a “legacy”. The Dodgers (will be spending **it loads of cash for one), the Cardinals (have been living through several years of pitching disasters and still winning), and here’s a wild idea for my Pirate fan friends (the Pirates could buy for a change and restore the luster of a proud franchise that seems on the brink now, never mind if they get one or two pieces). In the AL there are the always shopping Angels, and even though their house needs a cleaning I’ll add the Red Sox, and Felix would be a nice additon in Chicago or Detroit too…so that’s seven places he could build a legacy. Or….his arm might fall off… and leave some team wishing they had passed.

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