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Jeff Kent lost 22 pounds on “Survivor” and had a torn MCL the entire time

Nov 9, 2012, 11:51 AM EDT


Every Thursday morning for the past eight weeks I’ve been recapping Jeff Kent’s adventures on “Survivor,” which came to an end this week when he was voted out in ninth place during an episode filled with weirdness and culminating in the former MVP going off on a pretty memorable rant:

You know what pisses me off? I think I’ve made about 60 million dollars playing baseball and I want this frickin’ million dollars in this game. And it’s not even a million bucks, it’s 600 grand by the time Obama takes it. I’m a Game 7 World Series loser. You know, I played in the biggest games in the world and the worst games in the world, and this just sucks.

CBS’ cameras stayed with Kent after the actual episode was finished, following him to the “Ponderosa” where voted-out players stay until the entire show is over:

Some of the video highlights:

– Kent is met by R.C., the 10th-place finisher, and immediately apologizes to her for getting her voted out. He then repeatedly complains to her that “no one wanted to play” and that’s what led to his exit. Then, after eating dinner together, Kent tells the camera: “R.C. likes to talk a lot, but she’s a good girl.”

– Kent sees himself in the mirror for the first time in a month and seems shocked, saying: “This is the longest my hair has ever been. I look like a cave man.” His hair is not at all long in any sort of common usage of the word “long” and he doesn’t even have a particularly full beard. But whatever.

– He immediately shaves his beard, but leaves his famous porn-star mustache.

– They weigh him and find that he lost 22 pounds, going from 212 to 190. “I hadn’t weighed 190 pounds since high school.”

– Minutes into the first episode Kent injured his knee literally getting off the boat and guessed that it was a torn MCL. Sure enough, a doctor examines him and diagnoses him with a torn MCL, which he’d been walking and running and swimming and winning challenges with for 25 days.

  1. frenchysplatediscipline - Nov 9, 2012 at 11:57 AM

    So that will be the last post about this putrid show I presume?

    • El Bravo - Nov 9, 2012 at 12:28 PM

      I hope so, but admittedly, I’ve read every single one. I have some soul-searching to do I guess.

      • stex52 - Nov 9, 2012 at 1:34 PM

        Don’t feel bad. I read it every week in the hope we would find out a python had eaten Jeffy.

        Sometimes rooting against is the most fun you can have.

      • mashoaf - Nov 12, 2012 at 4:58 AM

        I was hoping they’d have a challenge of riding wheelies on motorcycles.

      • stlouis1baseball - Nov 13, 2012 at 2:17 PM

        I am embarassed to admit that I am with you Bravo. Soul searching it is.

    • mrfloydpink - Nov 9, 2012 at 6:26 PM

      Seriously, don’t be such a fucking snob. The show’s not my thing, and it’s not your thing, and that’s fine. Lots of people like it, and there’s no need to look down your nose at them.

      • stex52 - Nov 10, 2012 at 11:05 AM

        So stating that we don’t like a show makes us snobs? I didn’t see him commenting on the other viewers.

      • frenchysplatediscipline - Nov 13, 2012 at 10:28 AM

        Too bad such a great band has to be sullied by you using it as a moniker…

  2. wlschneider09 - Nov 9, 2012 at 12:10 PM

    Unfortunately our temporary reprieve from election related ads grants us no relief from reality television drivel.

  3. lew24 - Nov 9, 2012 at 12:11 PM

    He showed more guts in 25 days than he did in 4 season with the Dodgers!

    Got to love a guy that was born in So Cal…went to Cal but has a southern accent!

    Don’t break your wrist washing your truck Jeff!

  4. dickclydesdale - Nov 9, 2012 at 12:23 PM

    kent is a douche, all his teammates will validate him a 99.9 score on the d-bag meter.

    • bagsy5 - Nov 9, 2012 at 12:38 PM

      Funniest comment about him came from Lance Berkman. It was when Kent was accused of being racist. When Berkman was asked about that he said, “Jeff isn’t racist. He hates everyone equally.” Too funny (and correct).

  5. dexterismyhero - Nov 9, 2012 at 1:03 PM

    I still wish he would have slapped Bonds in the noggin in that dugout flare up.

    • lew24 - Nov 9, 2012 at 3:15 PM

      The funny thing about that blow up with Bonds was that according to reports Bonds was protecting one of his teammates from Kent!

  6. cameltoehoe - Nov 9, 2012 at 1:44 PM

    He had everything to be the ultimate Survivor but a social game. Sounds like his playing career. Still love & appreciate him. All is forgiven Jeff. It helps when our team is a two-time World Champion! Suck it Dodger fans!

    • koufaxmitzvah - Nov 9, 2012 at 3:12 PM

      Uh…. LA has 5 World Series championships.

      I mean, you’ve done well lately, but the ratio is still 5:2.

      Suck on that for a while.

  7. kiwicricket - Nov 9, 2012 at 1:58 PM

    Their prayers had literally been answered, Kent was cast away to an uninhabited island, far far away. Somewhere, Jeff Kent’s neighbors let out a collective moan.

    So what’s next, Gleeman?? Carlos Baerga on Idol?

  8. huffdaddyco - Nov 9, 2012 at 2:25 PM

    “You know what pisses me off? I think I’ve made about 60 million dollars playing baseball and I want this frickin’ million dollars in this game…”


    You know what pisses me off? Jeff Kent made about 60 million dollars playing baseball.

    • jarathen - Nov 9, 2012 at 3:54 PM

      And then has the gall to complain about it.

  9. cameltoehoe - Nov 9, 2012 at 3:17 PM

    What have done for me lately, Bitch!

    • koufaxmitzvah - Nov 9, 2012 at 6:19 PM

      What’s important is that Giants fans satisfaction is more decided by how Dodgers fans feel than how well their team actually played. And then I remind myself that, every once in a while, I’m actually conversing with a 7th grader.

  10. stairwayto7 - Nov 9, 2012 at 3:17 PM

    I heard he torn his MCL when washing his car! Oh wait that was a lie???

  11. sophiethegreatdane - Nov 9, 2012 at 3:24 PM

    “And it’s not even a million bucks, it’s 600 grand by the time Obama takes it.”

    Yeah Jeff, because Obama set the tax rate for that million bucks. Had nothing to do with any of the previous administrations, or congress. It’s all Obama. Heck, I bet that if you had won a million dollars in the G. Bush years, the tax rate would have only been like 5% right? Right? Yeah, frickin’ Obama.

    Just STFU, Kent. That $60 mil you earned? THAT would have been taxed at about a 70-80% rate in the 40’s and 50’s — the oh-so-glorious era for which conservatives always seem to long. Funny how the reality of what used to be wouldn’t actually be sustainable in today’s political environment where these rich assholes are paying maybe a 15% tax rate. Unreal.

    • jarathen - Nov 9, 2012 at 3:54 PM

      If you’re rich, it’s Obama’s fault.

    • lazlosother - Nov 9, 2012 at 11:49 PM

      Well Sophie, I can see you are naive. Just last week I noticed my change jar was lower than I had left it…. Obviously Obama. Then, I got sick and had to see a doctor…co-payment of 15$. Thanks a lot Obama. To top it off I wanted to buy a car, and a Chevy seemed like the car that fit the bill…. till I remembered that Obama put them out of business. #$*&^%!@%$#$&^*#$$%# Obama.

    • stlouis1baseball - Nov 13, 2012 at 2:16 PM

      Just so we are clear…
      It is okay to blame everything on George W. Bush (with the exception of the Bin Laden intel of course)…
      but NOT okay to blame anything on Obama?
      Okay…go it.

  12. rubberinnertube - Nov 9, 2012 at 9:21 PM

    Feel free to shut your own pie-hole…post haste!

    • sophiethegreatdane - Nov 9, 2012 at 11:53 PM

      Ah yes. How eloquent. “Shutting my pie hole” is the child’s response to being told a truth you don’t want to hear. I also seem to recall being told (ad nauseum) that the repubs were the party of “liberty”. I guess liberty, in your narrow definition, only includes free speech when folks are chanting neo-con echo chamber bullshit.

      • stlouis1baseball - Nov 13, 2012 at 2:24 PM

        It matters not Sophie.
        Everyone knows anything negative is George W. Bush’s fault…
        Further, anything positive is a result of Obama’s wonderful leadership.
        It’s the way things go in today’s climate.

        Barack H. Obama = The Sun literally rises and sets in his ass.
        To state otherwise clearly means you are a blatant racist.

        George W. Bush = Greedy, beady-eyed, big business, all oil, non-plane flying war mongerer.
        To state otherwise clearly means you are a blantantly wealthy, holier than white collar worker.

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