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The other Hall of Fame inductees announced

Dec 11, 2012, 3:04 PM EDT

Rush

Rock and Roll, that is:

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame has officially announced next year’s inductees: Rush, Public Enemy, Heart, Randy Newman, Donna Summer and Albert King

There’s no baseball news right now, so let’s find their baseball analogs:

Rush: Jim Rice.  Really not deserving, but their supporters are so vocal and such pains in the butt that at some point it’s just easier to let them in than leave them out. Not sure if Boston has a lot of Rock and Roll Hall of Fame support, but they’d be Jack Morris.

Public Enemy: Sandy Koufax. Burned brighter than anyone but only for a short while. “Yo! Bum Rush The Show,” “It Takes a Nation of Millions to Hold us Back,” “Fear of a Black Planet” and “Apocalypse 91″ are like Koufax’s 1963-66.

Heart: Ernie Banks. Not in overall greatness — Banks was of higher quality — but in terms of having two very distinct careers. “Barracuda” era Heart is Ernie Banks the shortstop. “These Dreams” Heart is first baseman Ernie Banks. The latter is OK — a guilty pleasure, even — but we would not be talking about their greatness if only the second half existed.

Randy Newman: I’ll admit, I only really know Randy Newman for “Short People,” “I Love L.A.” and his movie work. A lot of his stuff, I gather, especially songwriting for others, is really high quality. I’m just ignorant. So consider me to be one of the jerkier, willfully ignorant Hall of Fame voters circa 2004 and consider Newman my Bert Blyleven.

Donna Summer: An unfairly- judged representative of an era which everyone now says they hated but we all loved at the time and don’t you pretend we didn’t. So, of course, she’s Jeff Bagwell.

Albert King: I don’t know much about his career, but according to his Wikipedia entry his nickname was “The Velvet Bulldozer,” and that should get him in the Hall of Fame in and of itself.  Dick “Dr. Strangeglove” Stuart? I’m sure that’s totally unfair to King, but I don’t have a ton of time to check his stuff out right now. Anyone who wants to hip us to King’s bonafides in the comments, by all means do so.

When does baseball season start again?

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