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Ugueth Urbina is out of prison — and allegedly throwing 90

Dec 24, 2012, 6:48 AM EDT

Roy Hobbs said that some mistakes you never stop paying for. He apparently wasn’t talking about attacking the help with a machete and pouring gasoline on them, because you do stop paying for that. After about seven years or so:

That tweet is from for major league pitcher Ugueth Urbina’s son Juan Urbina standing with Ugueth himself. The son is saying “Finally with my father!” Juan Urbina, by the way, is a 19 year-old pitcher in the Mets’ system.

This courtesy of our friend Nick Collias, who tells me that Venezuelan newspapers are reporting that Urbina is out of jail after serving a little over seven years for attempted murder. Urbina was sentenced to 14 years, but no one is quite sure why he was released early.

Urbina pitched from 1995 through 2005 with the Expos, Tigers, Red Sox, Rangers, Phillies and Marlins. He twice saved 40 games or more and was still an effective pitcher, aged 31, at the time of his arrest and incarceration. He turns 39 in February, but unless the Venezuelan prison system has an intense baseball program, we probably won’t be hearing from him again in the majors.

UPDATE: NOT SO FAST! Nick Collias updates us:

Alexander Mendoza at El Nacional reported this morning that Urbina’s fastball was still touching 90 while he was playing in the pen in Venezuela. Juan Vicente Zerpa, the general manager of the Leones de Escogido (Urbina’s old haunt in the winter leagues) said after welcoming Urbina back to society, “I heard that he’s going to come to the park and we’re going to have a conversation.” Kind of ominous-sounding, no? If this were a Scorcese movie, I’d be wary.

So it would seem that all of your “heh, the Marlins are gonna sign him now” jokes may not be so funny after all!

Just kidding, they’ll still be hilarious.

  1. fanofevilempire - Dec 24, 2012 at 7:08 AM

    The Red Sox will offer him a three year contract worth 21 mil.

    • cackalackyank - Dec 24, 2012 at 10:03 AM

      I thought the standard Sawx contract this off season was 3/39.

      • deepstblu - Dec 24, 2012 at 5:10 PM

        Seriously folks, can you get a visa to work in the US after being convicted of something like this?

  2. fightinphils8008 - Dec 24, 2012 at 8:23 AM

    he will be closing for the Marlins. guaranteed.

    • Old Gator - Dec 24, 2012 at 10:39 AM

      No, he would be a better fit for the Beanbags, especially in their front orifice. He could become the assistant vice president in charge of character assassination. Sure, it lacks the immediate gratification of immolating the help, but if he can restrict himself to purely rhetorical attacks and leaks to the press, he might not even be violating the terms of his parole.

      • bobwsc - Dec 24, 2012 at 3:34 PM

        or he could join the feesh and tout good deeds of a cuban dictator.

  3. 13arod - Dec 24, 2012 at 8:32 AM

    if he signs with the marlins they will trade him at the trade deadline like they always trade there star players

    • Old Gator - Dec 24, 2012 at 11:02 AM

      Are you kidding? With the team they’re putting on the field this season, he’ll already be one of the stars. Macondo can take a would-be machete murderer and arsonista ad hominem to its heart just as long as he doesn’t say anything nice about Castro.

      • purnellmeagrejr - Dec 25, 2012 at 10:32 AM

        THe NAts willl pick him up a a “Character guy” to help bring along their younger players. He’s suppposed to be a “good clubhouse guy.”

  4. mybrunoblog - Dec 24, 2012 at 8:52 AM

    When you leave prison in Venezuela they give you an old school cowboy hat.

  5. jackdaniels1 - Dec 24, 2012 at 9:17 AM

    Wow, Juan looks a little light in the loafers. Ugie too in this one. This should be deleted from the family photo album immediately

    • tfbuckfutter - Dec 24, 2012 at 9:57 AM

      “Light in the loafers”?

      Is it the 1960s?

      If you want to call someone “queer” just own up to your bigotry and do it.

      • Old Gator - Dec 24, 2012 at 10:29 AM

        What’s really pathetic is that idiots like jack have been living under their trailers for so long that they still think people find comments like that funny – and they don’t even know how many drinks we’ve had.

      • jackdaniels1 - Dec 25, 2012 at 11:12 AM

        A fitting response coming from someone named buttf***er, LOL!

    • braddavery - Dec 25, 2012 at 10:36 AM

      You are a complete idiot.

      • Old Gator - Dec 25, 2012 at 11:57 AM

        You are far too generous. I can spot at least a half dozen flaws in his idiocy from here.

  6. dwrek5 - Dec 24, 2012 at 10:35 AM

    Hide yo kids, hide yo wife…

    • Old Gator - Dec 24, 2012 at 11:04 AM

      …but leave yo romaine lettuce out on the table and make yoself a quick easy Caesar salad once he been and gowne.

  7. anxovies - Dec 24, 2012 at 12:53 PM

    Little known fact of the day: Ugueth Urbina is the only major league player in history with the initials “UUU.” With all of the Me! Me! Me! going around with sports athletes it might be refreshing to have him back in the game. I love Wikipedia, I used to have to work for this kind of stuff.

  8. florida727 - Dec 24, 2012 at 12:55 PM

    Anybody, and I mean ANYBODY, that gives this CONVICTED FELON a contract is stupid.

  9. trllturner18 - Dec 24, 2012 at 2:28 PM

    Astros #1 pitcher

  10. yosoyrorro - Dec 24, 2012 at 3:18 PM

    Urbina used to play for Leones del Caracas, not Escogido. Escogido plays in the Dominican Winter League, not the Venezuelan Winter League

  11. westcoastredbird - Dec 24, 2012 at 4:20 PM

    Dude would be a nice guy to have around during a bench-clearing brawl.

    • Old Gator - Dec 24, 2012 at 4:45 PM

      Yeah – you could assign him to cover Johnny Cueto.

  12. yankeepunk3000 - Dec 24, 2012 at 5:44 PM

    I work in the law system and if he got 14 years then it isn’t a suprise he got out in 7. most prison sentences usually go half of what the years state. with good behavior most people go half if you cause trouble or fight then you serve the full time…with good behavior and with enough apeal cases or volunteer work in prison a lot of people only do 33% of time in to me it is a suprise he actually served a little over half his time. just letting you know why he got out early. because that is usually the norm…

  13. lostsok - Dec 24, 2012 at 7:05 PM


  14. seanb20124 - Dec 25, 2012 at 7:31 AM

    I always thought this charge would magically disappear with a payment to victim, or bribe to a govt official.

    • Old Gator - Dec 25, 2012 at 11:59 AM

      Huh? Are you confusing Venezuela with the Clinton pardons?

  15. franklinandbashandflorio - Dec 25, 2012 at 6:34 PM

    The whores of Venezuela better watch out these next few nights!

  16. truwarier90 - Dec 25, 2012 at 11:50 PM

    ok, im gonna keep it real on this blog, uggie’s son does look a lil’ queerish in that pic with that tight t-shirt and dyed hair. Also, uggie should get another chance with miami, the dude will always have a lightning arm, and with some workouts can still be a lights out closer.

  17. denny65 - Dec 26, 2012 at 11:08 AM

    The Mariners are set to offer him a one-year contract worth seven figures, guaranteed.

  18. flavordave - Dec 26, 2012 at 11:42 AM

    He practiced throwing balls and also honed his cutlery skills in prison.

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