Jan 9, 2013, 2:33 PM EDT
Hi, I’m Mike Piazza.*
Do you remember me? Normally I wouldn’t ask that because I seem to remember being quite famous a few years ago, but it seems like several hundred people whose business it was to follow my career have forgotten me, and I just don’t know how to deal with that. I mean, I know there were better players than me, but I hit .308/.377/.545 for my career with 427 homers in 16 seasons. My career OPS+ was 143. The next three catchers on that list whose careers have already ended are Mickey Cochrane, Bill Dickey and Johnny Bench, and they’re way behind. I played in the World Series. Everyone said when I played that I was heading to the Hall of Fame.
But today I got just 57.8% of the vote, and at the risk of sounding arrogant, I think that’s kinda light, don’t you?
It’s almost as if someone is holding something against me and my Hall of Fame candidacy apart from what I did on the field. I know that’s possible! It happens to a lot of players these days. But (again, sorry for being narcissistic) I Googled myself and I couldn’t find a single article written which presents any facts which would reasonably lead someone to withhold their vote. I wasn’t named on any lists or outed in anyone’s book. There’s just … nothing.
It’s almost as if 42.8% of the Hall of Fame electorate has been talking about me behind my back, too cowardly to come out and accuse me of something, yet holding that something against me all the same. I’m just a simple man from Pennsylvania and I don’t necessarily understand how everything in the world works, but that strikes me as kinda wrong.
Sorry if that’s rude, but it beats the other explanation I have in mind: that 42.8% of the BBWAA are blithering idiots and wouldn’t know a Hall of Fame catcher if Carlton Fisk fell out of the sky, landed on their face and started to wiggle.
Thanks for your time.
*At least we here are assuming this was Mike Piazza. We heard this voice with a distinct Pennsylvania accent saying these words in our head moments after the Hall of Fame results were announced and felt duty-bound to put to pen to paper in order to preserve them for posterity.
Aug 3, 2015, 10:03 PM EDT
Mike Hessman is the new minor league home run king.
Aug 3, 2015, 9:36 PM EDT
Nationals right-hander Stephen Strasburg has been sidelined since July 4 with a left oblique strain, but it sounds like he’s rounding into form for the stretch run.
Aug 3, 2015, 9:13 PM EDT
The Braves are calling him day-to-day, but these type of injuries are notoriously tricky.
Aug 3, 2015, 9:01 PM EDT
Clayton Richard tossed six innings of one-run ball in a win over the Padres on Sunday, but he was designated for assignment by the Cubs today for the second time in the past two weeks.
Aug 3, 2015, 8:19 PM EDT
Matz impressed over his first two starts in the majors before going down with a partial tear of his lat muscle, but he’s starting to ramp things up in preparation for his return.
Aug 3, 2015, 7:32 PM EDT
Kipnis is expected to miss two to three weeks.
Aug 3, 2015, 6:58 PM EDT
Cubs rookie third baseman Kris Bryant was forced to exit Sunday’s game against the Brewers after feeling dizzy on a hard slide into second base, but he’s back in the starting lineup for tonight’s series opener against the Pirates.
Aug 3, 2015, 6:01 PM EDT
Capps has quietly been one of the game’s most dominant relievers this season.
Aug 3, 2015, 5:19 PM EDT
Out since late May with a neck injury.
Aug 3, 2015, 5:14 PM EDT
Stop me if you’ve heard this one before.
Aug 3, 2015, 4:27 PM EDT
He is now calling Jose Bautista “a good man and a great human being.”
Aug 3, 2015, 4:00 PM EDT
The newest Blue Jay struck out 11 in eight innings of work.
Aug 3, 2015, 3:45 PM EDT
Panik’s breakout season has been put on hold.
Aug 3, 2015, 3:06 PM EDT
Dating back to 2013 he’s hit .337 with a .900 OPS off lefties.
Aug 3, 2015, 2:53 PM EDT
Power-hitting third baseman/first baseman.
Aug 3, 2015, 2:43 PM EDT
It’s not necessarily likely, but since it isn’t a torn UCL there’s at least a chance he could make it back.
Aug 3, 2015, 1:47 PM EDT
He’s spent this season at Triple-A, batting .260 with 13 homers and 11 steals.
Aug 3, 2015, 1:30 PM EDT
Time for a little Loria bashing to brighten up your Monday.
Aug 3, 2015, 12:41 PM EDT
Not a bad draw for him, as he has owned the Twins this season.
Aug 3, 2015, 10:47 AM EDT
Viciedo is still just 26 years old.
- Yordano Ventura calls Jose Bautista a “nobody” and accuses him of stealing signs 71
- And That Happened: Sunday’s scores and highlights 85
- The benches cleared in Toronto, too 79
- The Reds’ and Pirates’ benches cleared after Brandon Phillips was hit with a pitch 65
- Reminder: even though the trade deadline has passed, trades can still happen 13
- Settling the Scores: Saturday’s results 36
- Lucas Duda’s last eight hits have been home runs 11
- Report: Larry Lucchino stepping down as president and CEO of the Red Sox 32
- The benches cleared in Friday’s Giants-Rangers game (205)
- Blue Jays acquire David Price from the Tigers (113)
- Rangers land ace left-hander Cole Hamels from Phillies (106)
- Royals make another big move, get Ben Zobrist from A’s (95)
- Report: Rockies trade Troy Tulowitzki to Blue Jays for Jose Reyes and prospects (92)