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Paul Dolan named “control person” of the Cleveland Indians

Jan 10, 2013, 3:31 PM EST

Herbert and Dad

Listen, lad.  I’ve built this kingdom up from nothing.  When I started here, all there was was swamp.  All the kings said I was daft to build a castle in a swamp, but I built it all the same, just to show ‘em.  It sank into the swamp.  So, I built a second one. That sank into the swamp.  So I built a third one.  That burned down, fell over, then sank into the swamp.  But the fourth one stayed up. An’ that’s what your gonna get, lad — the strongest castle in these islands:

Baseball Commissioner Allan H. (Bud) Selig announced today that the Major League owners have formally approved the designation of Paul Dolan as the control person of the Cleveland Indians.  The Major League Clubs voted during today’s quarterly ownership meetings.

Each Major League Club has a designated control person who is accountable to Major League Baseball for the operation of the Club and for the Club’s compliance with the rules of Baseball.

The former control person, Paul’s father Larry, shall henceforth be known as “Larry, Dowager Countess of Progressive.”

  1. bigjimatch - Jan 10, 2013 at 3:41 PM

    Awesome reference, Craig!

  2. bigjimatch - Jan 10, 2013 at 3:41 PM

    now make sure he doesn’t leave.

    • evan5 - Jan 10, 2013 at 4:04 PM

      Oh, I thought you meant him! Seemed a bit daft for me to guard him when he’s a guard.

  3. chill1184 - Jan 10, 2013 at 4:14 PM

    Perhaps it may time to give these controllers power to make sure ownership doesn’t pocket revenue sharing money and you know actually puts it into the team?

  4. slartibartfast4242 - Jan 10, 2013 at 4:17 PM

    Now I have this strange urge to watch Monty Python and the Holy Grail and eat a brownie. It’s probably the weather…

  5. paperlions - Jan 10, 2013 at 4:22 PM

    Is being the “control person” like being the decider?

  6. proudlycanadian - Jan 10, 2013 at 4:25 PM

    Is there any significant difference between “control person” and “person of interest”?

  7. stex52 - Jan 10, 2013 at 5:45 PM

    Quis custodiet ipsos custodes??? (Those Romans knew what they were talking about)

  8. bigtrav425 - Jan 10, 2013 at 6:27 PM

    F the Dolans! I hope they die and die sooooon! they have a curse on my Tribe!

  9. hermie13 - Jan 10, 2013 at 6:35 PM

    yeah….the dolans are the ones that cursed the Tribe. i mean, the indians havent won a title since 1948 but clearly its the Dolans’ fault *eye roll*

    • thecleve01 - Jan 11, 2013 at 1:59 PM

      Obviously Hermie knows nothing about Cleveland baseball, the Indians may not have won since 1948, but had a shot every year since Jacobs field was built until Dolan bought the team in 2000. During those years the Yankees were chasing them. *eye roll*

      2012 Cleveland Indians American League 68 94 .420 20.0 1,603,596
      2011 Cleveland Indians American League 80 82 .494 15.0 2 1,840,835
      2010 Cleveland Indians American League 69 93 .426 25.0 4 1,394,812
      2009 Cleveland Indians American League 65 97 .401 21.5 4 1,776,904
      2008 Cleveland Indians American League 81 81 .500 7.5 3 2,182,087
      2007 Cleveland Indians American League 96 66 .593 – 1 2,275,916
      2006 Cleveland Indians American League 78 84 .481 18.0 4 1,997,936
      2005 Cleveland Indians American League 93 69 .574 6.0 2 2,014,220
      2004 Cleveland Indians American League 80 82 .494 12.0 3 1,814,401
      2003 Cleveland Indians American League 68 94 .420 22.0 4 1,730,001
      2002 Cleveland Indians American League 74 88 .457 20.5 3 2,616,940
      2001 Cleveland Indians American League 91 71 .562 – 1 3,175,523
      2000 Cleveland Indians American League 90 72 .556 5.0 2 3,456,278
      1999 Cleveland Indians American League 97 65 .599 – 1 3,468,436
      1998 Cleveland Indians American League 89 73 .549 – 1 3,467,299
      1997 Cleveland Indians American League 86 75 .534 – 1 3,404,750
      1996 Cleveland Indians American League 99 62 .615 – 1 3,318,174
      1995 Cleveland Indians American League 100 44 .694 – 1 2,842,745

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