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Mike Piazza took karate lessons to prepare for Roger Clemens, saw Guns N’ Roses after 1998

Feb 11, 2013, 2:30 PM EDT

piazzamike_g_110911_420_1-1 Getty Images

We’ve seen some of the excerpts from Mike Piazza’s upcoming book. But beyond PEDs and the Hall of Fame, there’s other interesting stuff. Like how he was all ready to fight Roger Clemens after the helmet beaning incident:

Piazza tells how he mapped out a plan for revenge — taking karate lessons and visualizing the next time they would go at it.

“I would approach with my fist pulled back. I figured he’d throw his glove out for protection. I’d parry the glove and then get after it,” Piazza writes.

Except he didn’t, and Piazza chides himself in the book for never throwing a punch, in part because he was worried he’d get his butt beat.  Which, whatever. If Robin Ventura could recover from his ass-whupping, I don’t see why Piazza couldn’t have risked it.

But that’s not the only embarrassment Piazza reveals:

After a Guns N’ Roses concert, Piazza — who’d been drinking vodka all night — chided lead singer Axl Rose for wearing Rangers, Knicks and Yankees jerseys on stage. But not his team’s.

“I’m obliterated. I go, ‘Hey, yo, Axl! What the f–k, man? Like, you know, you think you could’ve mixed in a Mets jersey?’ ”

That would be relatively hilarious if it had happened during the “Use Your Illusion” tour, but if Piazza was yelling at Axl to wear Mets stuff it had to have happened after he was traded there in 1998.

I’m sorry, but actually admitting to going to a Guns N’ Roses concert in those weird years before “Chinese Democracy” was released is way more embarrassing than getting your butt beat by Roger Clemens.

  1. atribecalledquestec - Feb 11, 2013 at 2:43 PM

    *in Daffy Duck voice* Ho! Ha-ha! Dodge! Spin! Parry! Ha! Thrust!

  2. thebadguyswon - Feb 11, 2013 at 2:43 PM

    Clemens is a big dude for sure. But remember the spring when Piazza went after Guillermo Mota? When a man gets that livid, he can fight anyone.

    Personally, I think a Piazza-Clemens fight would have been a dud. Two big oafs that would have been separated before anything major happened anyway.

  3. mybrunoblog - Feb 11, 2013 at 2:46 PM

    Why the hate on G n R ? Pound for pound maybe the best hard rock band of the last 25 years.
    Piazza left out the story in his book about when he met Clemens in midtown one day. Clemens passed by Piazza and yelled at him calling him a “big pussy”. Piazza then hit Clemens with his purse. Sorry I couldn’t resist!

    • okwhitefalcon - Feb 11, 2013 at 2:49 PM

      No Slash, no GNR.

      • whatthehellisansky - Feb 11, 2013 at 3:31 PM

        No Izzy, no Duff and no Slash = no GN’R.

        Gotta say, on the most recent/current tour Axl put on a hell of a show- played 4 hours of GNR old and new. Pretty impressive regardless of who played the instruments….

      • kirkvanhouten - Feb 11, 2013 at 3:35 PM

        I can’t decide what’s more shameful, doing GNR without Slash or doing it with Tommy Stinson.

        Come on Tommy, you’re better than this.

        (Side note: Stinson allegedly tried to convince former Minor Threat/Dag Nasty and current Bad Religion guitarist Brian Baker into joining GNR. Thankfully, Baker had enough self respect to say no).

    • jaysjunkie - Feb 11, 2013 at 10:37 PM

      Chinese Democracy is hugely underrated. I love the material from the “classic lineup”, but I laugh that people were so disappointed and surprised that the album didn’t sound like the old GNR. Uh, what’d you expect when the lineup had been almost completely turned over and almost a decade and a half had passed since their last album?

  4. okwhitefalcon - Feb 11, 2013 at 2:47 PM

    It had to have been 2002 when Rose was going through the cornrow/sports jersey phase,

    Thank you Mr.Google for supplying that info and Mr. YouTube for providing video evidence.

    And for the record, I saw GNR on the UYI Tour complete with back up singers and horn section.

    And for the record, I’m still embarrassed.

  5. paint771 - Feb 11, 2013 at 3:17 PM

    On a slightly more serious note, his attitude on the rumors he was gay is the best revelation from that story.

    Questions about his sexuality bothered him less than the insinuation that he was somehow phony. “I found it hugely insulting that people believed I’d go so far out of my way — living with Playmates, vacationing with actresses, showing up at nightclubs — to act out a lifestyle that would amount to a charade,” he writes. “If I was gay, I’d be gay all the way.”

    I kind of love that.

    • Reflex - Feb 11, 2013 at 3:29 PM

      That is indeed awesome.

    • cur68 - Feb 11, 2013 at 4:15 PM

      Yeah, props to Piazza for that one. I’m glad that Piazza is more offended by the phony insinuations than the gay ones. Who cares what he does in private, anyways? He seems to be interested in consenting adults, after that, none of anyone else’s business. He sure comes across as a pretty regular, enlightened person. Much more so than Roger Clemens ever did. You can tell a lot about a guy by his enemies. Since Piazza & Clemens never got along, Mike Piazza must be at least as good a dude as Clemens is a douche.

      • paint771 - Feb 11, 2013 at 4:36 PM

        Agreed, which is obviously the reason I posted it.

        However, a secondary motive is the juvenile one. I got in my head Mike Piazza going “Oh man, if I was gay, I’d be gay as F*CK, bro. I’d be the swishiest godd*mn queer you’ve ever seen in your life. Sh*t man, I’d be wearing boas and leather pants behind the plate, every day, no question. You heard of power bottoms? I’d be a power up down and sideways. They’d be building floats of me and sh*t and rolling that sh*t down the Castro every Gay Parade parade or whatever. I’d be, like, LEGENDARY gay. Sheeit. I’m Mike Piazza, bro.”

      • cur68 - Feb 11, 2013 at 5:08 PM

        ROFL

    • unclemosesgreen - Feb 11, 2013 at 4:53 PM

      He went on to add “Plus I definitely would have been a pitcher, not a catcher.”

      • paint771 - Feb 11, 2013 at 6:25 PM

        Damn – I can’t believe I missed that one.

        /facepalm

    • indaburg - Feb 11, 2013 at 5:14 PM

      “Sheeit. I’m Mike Piazza, bro.”

      Damnit, paint. You made me snort my drink in laughter.

  6. The Dangerous Mabry - Feb 11, 2013 at 3:47 PM

    I’m not sure it would help, frankly.

    Clemens doesn’t know karate, but he knows ka-razy.

    Hat tip to the godfather of soul.

    • The Dangerous Mabry - Feb 11, 2013 at 3:49 PM

      Of course that was supposed to link to 3:38, but you know, stupid thing embedded instead.

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