Comments on: Bryce Harper eats Fruity Pebbles and Cap’n Crunch at midnight. Stays healthy.

By: fanofevilempire

fanofevilempire — Thu, 21 Feb 2013 15:01:04 +0000

sounds like Harper has the munchies from smoking funny looking fat ones.

By: Old Gator

Old Gator — Thu, 21 Feb 2013 04:52:51 +0000

Speaking of alcohol free mythologies, whaddya wanna bet Joseph Campbell could have written about Brigham Young and downed a sixpack of Harp at the same time?

By: churchoftheperpetuallyoutraged

churchoftheperpetuallyoutraged — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 23:37:30 +0000

Mmmm diabetes.

By: kevinbnyc

kevinbnyc — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 22:37:06 +0000

Where are all the idiots saying he must be using PEDs???

By: anxovies

anxovies — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 20:08:43 +0000

How about fava beans and a nice chianti?

By: theoneandonlykill

theoneandonlykill — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 20:07:30 +0000

Wait until he starts drinking micro beers.

By: theoneandonlykill

theoneandonlykill — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 20:04:01 +0000

I rather have a nice BOTTLE of1988 Chateau de Beaucastel Chateauneuf-du-Pape.

By: sabatimus

sabatimus — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 18:54:36 +0000

Go ahead Bryce: eat what you want now. When you get into your thirties, important things like metabolism start to get in your way

By: 18thstreet

18thstreet — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 17:15:03 +0000

Fried chicken and beer? I don’t get it. Is this some sort of brand-new, timely inside joke I’ve never heard before?

By: amartland

amartland — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 16:54:00 +0000

if “Beckett-Proof” doesn’t become a new metric to measure potential FA signings by, I don’t want to live on this planet anymore

By: cur68

cur68 — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 16:29:34 +0000

He belongs to one of the alcohol free mythologies (mormon, I think). Even if he was old enough to drink, he wouldn’t be allowed to under the rules of his people.

Technically, he’s Beckett-Proof.

By: amartland

amartland — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 16:11:12 +0000

Yes, because as a 20 year-old professional athlete, access to beer must be nigh impossible!

By: El Bravo

El Bravo — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 16:08:47 +0000

Yeah I want that.

By: Old Gator

Old Gator — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 15:58:53 +0000

Mmmmmmm boulliabaise, accompanied by a chilled glass of 1984 Pouligny-Montrachet, crusty French bread garlic croutons and a peach creme broulee drizzled with Cassis for dessert.

Fuck Fruity Pebbles.

By: atltoarizona

atltoarizona — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 15:32:48 +0000

When he’s 21 they better not let Beckett anywhere near him or those Fruity Pebbles and Captain Crunch will turn into fried chicken and beer.

By: natstowngreg

natstowngreg — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 15:28:16 +0000

Thanks a freakin’ lot, Craig. Got back from working out my poor excuse for a sixtysomething body, hoping to forestall dropping dead, and you hit me with a story of some genetic freak kid who can eat whatever junk he wants. Makes one want to go to the Papa John’s near one’s office and scarf down a large 6-topping pizza, out of sheer depression.

Of course, if Young Mr. Harper uses his genetic freakishness to help bring the Nats more wins, I’ll cope somehow.

By: echech88

echech88 — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 15:23:27 +0000

I remember some writer (maybe Law?) wondering about Harper’s frame a couple years ago and how it could fill out similar to someone like Adam Dunn in his later years.

I imagine, like Trout, his diet will fall in line as he gets older and realizes his body responds better to better food. Right now he can eat whatever he wants and it won’t matter.

By: El Bravo

El Bravo — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 15:22:43 +0000

mmmmmm pie

By: donkeydrew

donkeydrew — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 15:21:13 +0000

your heart feels like its going to explode from fruity pebbles? uh ok… thats… werid.

By: sportsdrenched

sportsdrenched — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 15:20:22 +0000

Makes sense, you have to have calorie surplus to build muscle. That and he’s 20, and a professional athlete, meaning he has the time to workout like…a professional athlete.

Even a 20 year desk jockey couldn’t get away with that for too long.

By: natstowngreg

natstowngreg — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 15:19:28 +0000

Perhaps, after his career ends. When, like too many pro athletes, he isn’t as active, but eats the same. That’s a long way off.

By: zzalapski

zzalapski — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 15:13:19 +0000

He’s still got some time before he has to switch from his seefood diet (“see food, eat food”). Might as well enjoy it while he can.

By: Ben

Ben — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 15:07:31 +0000

Mmmm diabetes.

By: unclemosesgreen

unclemosesgreen — Wed, 20 Feb 2013 15:04:27 +0000

That’s the old C.C. Sabathia diet – boxes and boxes of cereal every day. Of course, the longer you duel with Cap’n Crunch, the harder it becomes to do crunches.