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Clam chowder ambushed Jhonny Peralta

Mar 11, 2013, 4:46 PM EDT

Tigers shortstop Jhonny Peralta was scratched from today’s lineup because …

Food allergies or not, just generally speaking “what is in this soup? is a decent thing to ask before eating soup. I’ve learned that the hard way. But, you know, YOLO and all that.

  1. chacochicken - Mar 11, 2013 at 4:51 PM

    When traveling to foreign countries, it is best to know a little of the language, particularly key phrases such as “where is the bathroom?”, “what is the age of consent here?” and, last but not least “what is in this soup?”

  2. unclemosesgreen - Mar 11, 2013 at 4:53 PM

    Since they were playing the Mets, I’m going to assume it was 1) intentional sabotage and 2) Manhattan clam chowder.

    • flosox - Mar 12, 2013 at 7:41 AM

      Is that the red or the white? I can never remember that…

      • unclemosesgreen - Mar 12, 2013 at 8:56 AM

        (Struggling to regain composure) Real clam chowder is white, and it comes from Boston. Crappy, scampi-tasting garbage is Manhattan.

  3. cur68 - Mar 11, 2013 at 4:58 PM

    Is chowder today’s dose of Tiger’s Awesomeness™? If so, I highly recommend more of that soup for the rest of them.

    • historiophiliac - Mar 11, 2013 at 5:03 PM

      I think you’re up at the plate. Verlander’s practicing.

      • cur68 - Mar 11, 2013 at 5:14 PM

        JV’s the cowardly porcupine in this parable, isn’t he? Well I, as a Beaver Lover, will fear not. Like all Beaver Lovers I got fast hips (just one of my many tools). Avila will probably be injured diving for JV’s “junk ball”.

      • historiophiliac - Mar 11, 2013 at 5:19 PM

        Just don’t let him break your bat. Beavers are fickle about these things. They’ll drop you from their rotation for something like that.

      • cur68 - Mar 11, 2013 at 5:26 PM

        Won’t break. Its aluminum. A 67mm diameter, 86.4 cm long, 0.907 kg one. Matte black.

      • historiophiliac - Mar 11, 2013 at 5:29 PM

        Ahh, yes, the true value of math.

      • cur68 - Mar 11, 2013 at 5:40 PM

        Measure of a man’s worth, your basic mathematics.

  4. historiophiliac - Mar 11, 2013 at 5:01 PM

    The Dominicans poisoned him!!!!!

    • indaburg - Mar 11, 2013 at 5:09 PM

      Peralta is Dominican?

      • historiophiliac - Mar 11, 2013 at 5:10 PM

        No, he was on team Venezuela…funny how he gets sick coming back. Dominicans!

      • indaburg - Mar 11, 2013 at 5:17 PM

        He’s definitely Dominican:

        http://www.baseball-reference.com/players/p/peraljh01.shtml

        Born in the same town as my grandma.

        If he was playing for Venezuela, then the poisoning was justified!

      • historiophiliac - Mar 11, 2013 at 5:22 PM

        My bad, I got my weak infielders confused. :)

      • indaburg - Mar 11, 2013 at 6:09 PM

        It’s ok. The Venezuelans can have him.

  5. rjostewart - Mar 11, 2013 at 5:25 PM

    He got confused when the clumsy, Clouseau-esque waiter pronounced it as “show-dair.”

    • churchoftheperpetuallyoutraged - Mar 11, 2013 at 8:00 PM

      Say chowder Frenchy!

  6. sandwiches4ever - Mar 11, 2013 at 5:45 PM

    Nobody expects the clam chowder!

  7. b453841l - Mar 11, 2013 at 6:46 PM

    diarrhea!!!

  8. borophyll - Mar 12, 2013 at 8:14 AM

    Just looking at him, Jhonny doesn’t strike me as someone who is discerning about his food consumption.

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