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Wanna buy Tino Martinez’s house?

Mar 14, 2013, 5:16 PM EDT

Tino Martinez Getty Getty Images

The latest baseball residence on the market: former Yankees first baseman Tino Martinez, whose Tampa house is described thusly:

Built in 1952, the trophy home flexes some serious muscle from the get-go with a two-story foyer. From there, it’s a parade of luxury befitting a world champ; a sprawling master suite, flush in Venetian plaster, boasts cathedral ceilings and private terrace overlooking the bay, while other forms of opulence range from a wood-paneled home theater to a fully loaded home gym to a wine cellar and tasting room. However, where Tino clearly hits one out of the park is in the backyard, where the legendary Bronx Bomber has a basketball court, putting green, infinity pool and an outdoor kitchen looking out over the waterfront.

I suppose the bones are nice enough, but man it’s pretty ugly inside. Most ballplayers’ houses look like that. Kind of like it was a model home or something. I just don’t get it. It’s like they spent their whole careers in hotel lobbies so they decided to decorate their houses like them too.

But still: it’s right near Jeter’s house. Seriously. I’m sure that has its good points.

 

  1. vallewho - Mar 14, 2013 at 5:22 PM

    no

    • proudlycanadian - Mar 14, 2013 at 6:18 PM

      Not I either.

  2. tuberippin - Mar 14, 2013 at 6:04 PM

    As a long-time Tino Martinez fan who was in the stands to watch him hit the game-tying home run in Game 4 of the 2001 World Series (allowing Derek Jeter to eventually hit the game-winning HR off Byung-Hyun Kim and get crowned “Mr. November”)…yes, yes I would be interested in buying Tino’s house.

    Now I just need six million two hundred thousand dollars.

  3. schlom - Mar 14, 2013 at 7:19 PM

    If you look at his house on Google Maps, the house next door is blurred out on Streetview: http://goo.gl/maps/Apljt

    Why would anyone want to have their house hidden? Do they have giant swastikas or something painted on the front?

  4. Jonny 5 - Mar 14, 2013 at 7:27 PM

    What no batting cage?

  5. js20011041 - Mar 14, 2013 at 7:45 PM

    Like Craig said, I’m not too thrilled with the inside. A lot of the more expensive homes are like that. They manage to be both too sterile and too busy. It just looks like it would be a hard place to relax. Also, if you were to buy Martinez’ home, you’d have to live inside the city of Tampa which, by and large, is a shithole. No thanks.

  6. tfbuckfutter - Mar 14, 2013 at 8:52 PM

    Man, if I was a rich ball player my house would be totally normal….

    You’d walk in and I’d be like “There’s my TV, there’s the couch I fall asleep on most nights….that’s the corner the dog pees in when I’m too drunk to let him out at night….”

  7. cur68 - Mar 14, 2013 at 10:02 PM

    Tino’s house is staged beautifully. Not too much with the opulence to make a new owner uncomfortable and feeling overwhelmed. Instead is inviting and warm with evidence of wealth and taste…for the most part. The one room with the clashing colours is trying WAY to hard. The rest of it looks very “My Mansion-esque”. Had I THAT kind of dough, I’d consider it . . . if only to spy on Minka.

  8. mazblast - Mar 14, 2013 at 10:23 PM

    “the legendary Bronx Bomber”

    Tino Martinez? Good ballplayer, but “legendary”? Puh-lease.

    • tfbuckfutter - Mar 14, 2013 at 10:44 PM

      I believe it was Johnny Cash who penned “The Legend of The First Baseman Who Was Surprisingly Good At Baseball For A Guy Who Always Wore Eye-Liner.”

  9. oregonbravesfan - Mar 14, 2013 at 11:36 PM

    He’s selling the Tampa house because Jeffrey Loria told him he should buy a house in Miami…

  10. jm91rs - Mar 15, 2013 at 8:41 AM

    I’ve seen much worse in these ball players’ homes. I think with some modern furniture and maybe a little carpet it could be pretty sweet. Think he’d take 5.2?

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