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Bryce Harper was barfing between innings last night, bro

Apr 18, 2013, 11:03 AM EDT

Bryce Harper homer

And the dude still went 4 for 5. Mark Zuckerman of CSNWashington.com:

He received an IV before the game. He had to excuse himself during the second inning to go vomit. He felt his head spinning every time he tried to swing a bat. He had to hunch over several times after running the bases.

And he gave a bunch of “doing what I can to help the ballclub” quotes afterward. So he’s a pro on the field and in the clubhouse despite his bodily fluids not wanting to stay where they’re supposed to.

I know there’s a hidden data problem at work here — we notice when things happen but don’t notice when they don’t happen –but I’m always amazed by these stories about athletes having great games with the flu. I read something once, can’t for the life of me remember where, where an athlete tried to explain a good night he had with the flu. His answer was some version of “the only thing that kept me from wanting to barf and die was focusing on what I was doing at the moment.” I don’t know if there’s anything to that. But it sort of sounds like how focusing on a TV show or something helps you forget when you’re laid up in bed with some bug.

Except, unlike us, athletes actually can do things besides watch “The Price is Right.”

  1. Francisco (FC) - Apr 18, 2013 at 11:15 AM

    Based on this Phillies fans should taint the line-up’s water supply. See if that gets them to focus.

  2. dmaziuk - Apr 18, 2013 at 11:40 AM

    Brown bottle flu

  3. turdfurgerson68 - Apr 18, 2013 at 11:45 AM

    Que the exaggeration! ‘

    Barfing? Sure. Head spinning’??? Gimme a break.

    • indaburg - Apr 18, 2013 at 12:15 PM

      Head spinning, also known as dizziness or light-headedness is a symptom of dehydration. This doesn’t sound like an exaggeration at all.

      • djpostl - Apr 18, 2013 at 12:40 PM

        It also means nothing if we don’t know the cause of it. Could be a bad hangover as much as it could be a guy “gutting through the flu”.

      • indaburg - Apr 18, 2013 at 12:49 PM

        Regardless of the root cause of the vomiting (flu, hangover, food poisoning etc.), vomiting causes dehydration. A symptom of dehydration is dizziness, aka head spinning. Trust me. I don’t just play a nurse on tv.

        If it was a hangover (not likely since the boy is also a Mormon, and Mormons abstain from alcohol), I still give him props. I’ve been hungover to the point of vomiting, and the only thing I felt up to was crawling to the porcelain god.

      • DelawarePhilliesFan - Apr 18, 2013 at 1:01 PM

        I have a hard time believing his head was spinning – yes, it CAN happen in that situation, but I do not believe it was, else he wojld not have had the hits. Craig’s man-crush not withstanding, the guy isn’t Superman. If his head was truly spinning, he wold not have seen the ball (sorry, he would not)

        In fairness to Harper, no where does he actually say his head was spinning – I think Zuckerman was man-crushing as well. Kinda like the “Frozen Tundra of Lambuea Field” – it’s not actually Tundra

      • turdfurgerson68 - Apr 18, 2013 at 1:15 PM

        If his head was ‘spinning’ why was he even in the game or allowed to play?!?

        Whould you drive with your head ‘spinning’? Operate machinery? Stand in the batters box and face missles??

        C’mon seriously if he was that ill why risk his wellbeing even more???

        Sorry, i don’t buy it.

      • indaburg - Apr 18, 2013 at 1:35 PM

        I find your lack of faith disturbing.

      • indaburg - Apr 18, 2013 at 1:48 PM

        As a nurse, I would strongly advise a patient feeling head “spinning” to avoid driving, operating machinery, or playing any sport. Conversely, from my experience with 20 year old men, most think they’re immortal and wouldn’t listen to me. He had already missed a game. Someone would have probably had to tie him up for him to miss another. I have no crush on the kid, but I’m not a hater either.

      • heyblueyoustink - Apr 18, 2013 at 1:41 PM

        Head spinning?!?!

        Now that’s head spinning, bro’.

      • turdfurgerson68 - Apr 18, 2013 at 2:18 PM

        No hater here chief.

        Thats why the team has a medical staff…to prevent him from causing himselfharm…regardless of his age.

      • Francisco (FC) - Apr 18, 2013 at 2:29 PM

        Could be a bad hangover as much as it could be a guy “gutting through the flu”.

        Ouch. Bad example. You know this particular guy doesn’t drink right?

  4. gloccamorra - Apr 18, 2013 at 12:00 PM

    Ken Caminiti had such a game, and he won the MVP award that year. It was mid-season game in Mexico. Will the voters remember this April game in the Fall? As for the concentration, it’s a Laser-Like Focus (LLF) – there’s nothing it can’t do for you.

  5. banksatdixie - Apr 18, 2013 at 12:06 PM

    So every time there is a Bryce Harper post we are going to have to endure the “bro” stuff? I was really hoping that’d die last season, bro.

    • DelawarePhilliesFan - Apr 18, 2013 at 1:03 PM

      Wait until Harper launches another tirade or two at Reporters – and the man-crush will wane a tad. Then “bro” will go

      (Harper defense force is already preparing to vehemently deny Harper will ever get cross again)

      • paperlions - Apr 18, 2013 at 3:30 PM

        Another? When did this happen?

      • DelawarePhilliesFan - Apr 18, 2013 at 8:44 PM

        Even Mr. “I Dream of Bryce-y” himself called it a misstep

        http://hardballtalk.nbcsports.com/2012/10/09/bryce-harper-gets-a-bit-testy-at-a-reporter/

      • paperlions - Apr 19, 2013 at 7:35 AM

        THAT is a tirade? If you really think that, you’ve just decided to hate him and to look for any nit to pick to prove just how petty you can be.

      • DelawarePhilliesFan - Apr 19, 2013 at 8:59 AM

        A) Settle down – we are talking about being annoyed by the term “bro”, not having the guy arrested (you are missing the levity in my comments)

        B) You want to de-construct what raises to the level of tirade, go ahead. This wasn’t serious discussion in the first place

  6. indaburg - Apr 18, 2013 at 12:16 PM

    Most of us would crawl in bed and rest (not unwisely) if we were this sick. Kudos to him. One tough kid.

  7. mybrunoblog - Apr 18, 2013 at 12:32 PM

    Harper is a tough kid. Flu, up chucking, dizziness and goes 4-5. Awesome. Me with flu? Sick days, laying in bed complaining and watching reruns of Pawn Stars.

    • historiophiliac - Apr 18, 2013 at 12:36 PM

      But, sadly, no puking on the field so we can have the gif for eternity. That would definitely become a thing (You hurling, bro? or the like.).

      • recoveringcubsfan - Apr 18, 2013 at 1:08 PM

        Unfortunately for you, he sat out the previous 2 games with the same ailment, so probably not much in his stomach to evacuate, anyway.

        Harper looked like death all game, sunken eyes, pale, glassy pupils, the whole bit. I was impressed he made a catch in LF, I woulda been like fuck it have a triple. The double he hit, he was so far out in front of the pitch, it was an obvious bad swing where maybe be just wanted to get back in the dugout and instead he got a 180-foot jog out of it.

      • natslady - Apr 18, 2013 at 2:57 PM

        Span was also out for two games with the same ailment. It could be those two are drinking buddies, but I kinda don’t think so. Sometimes the flu is just the flu.

      • historiophiliac - Apr 18, 2013 at 3:06 PM

        I thought Hotlips Harper didn’t drink. This is why you should stay home when you’re sick: they are probably just passing those germs all around the clubhouse.

  8. rcali - Apr 18, 2013 at 12:48 PM

    That’s a barf question bro.

  9. vallewho - Apr 18, 2013 at 1:26 PM

    Too much Chipotle???

    • historiophiliac - Apr 18, 2013 at 1:36 PM

      Other end.

  10. JB (the original) - Apr 18, 2013 at 1:45 PM

    I know what he’s talking about. I’ve done my best “test taking” when sick/hungover. It keeps you from overthinking things–you’re too worried about the next time you cough that whatever is left squirreling around in your guts is going to blow through your tightly clenched sphincters like a cab through a yellow light.

  11. brianbowman16 - Apr 18, 2013 at 2:04 PM

    Harvey Haddix had a horrible flu and went out and pitched 12 innings of perfect baseball……and lost

  12. 13arod - Apr 18, 2013 at 3:00 PM

    michal jordan

  13. aceshigh11 - Apr 18, 2013 at 3:11 PM

    That’s a clown virus, bro.

  14. dowhatifeellike - Apr 18, 2013 at 3:22 PM

    Shanahan says he’s good to go.

  15. bat42boy - Apr 18, 2013 at 5:23 PM

    Who Cares!!

  16. knowlegeforyou - Apr 18, 2013 at 7:00 PM

    Bet the D’Backs are salivating right now. He Oozes Grit lol

  17. kollin7 - Apr 18, 2013 at 8:50 PM

    Best title ever.

  18. pilonflats - Apr 18, 2013 at 11:32 PM

    I read an interview years ago with an nfl player and he said he was at best when he was sick because it helped his focus

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