May 8, 2013, 6:50 AM EDT
Mets 1, White Sox 0: For as good a pitcher as Matt Harvey is, something is clearly wrong with him given that he did not get the win in this game. The object of the game is to win it, Matt. You clearly lack The Will to Win, as I’m sure Hawk Harrelson mentioned during the broadcast of this game. Give me Bobby Parnell, who notched his third win of the season. He knows what’s truly important. Harvey: nine innings, one hit, twelve strikeouts, no walks but — again, I must stress — no win. Tsk tsk.
Reds 5, Braves 4: Craig Kimbrel: no longer immortal. Ninth inning homers surrendered to Shin-Soo Choo — who hit two — and Devin Mesoraco rocked and shocked the Braves who entered the ninth with a one run lead. Closers, man. Closers.
Blue Jays 6, Rays 4: Everything in this game pales compared to the condition of J.A. Happ after he took a line drive off the side of his head. As I write this all that is known is that he is scheduled for a CT scan and is in stable condition. Here’s hoping the visuals of it are far worse than the damage.
Astros 7, Angels 6: Gonna laugh my butt off when the Astros pass the Angels four fourth in the AL West. Houston snaps a six-game skid.
Brewers 6, Rangers 3: Yuniesky Betancourt hit his eighth homer because baseball is random and fun and the Baseball Gods want us to try to figure out how in the hell thinks like Yuniesky Betancourt becoming an offensive force ever happen. His explanation for all the home runs he’s hitting:
“Leave the ball on home plate and I swing”
“I swing wherever it is,” he did not add, “but wen it’s on home plate I actually hit it.”
Rockies 2, Yankees 0: A two-run homer for Carlos Gonzalez was Hiroki Kuroda‘s only real mistake, but given that Jorge De La Rosa made no such mistakes to the Yankees it was enough. The Yankees don’t play in Coors Field much, but when they do they tend to lose.
Diamondbacks 5, Dodgers 3: Paul Goldschmidt with a two-run homer off Brandon League in the ninth to break the tie and, ultimately, win the game. It was an 11-pitch at bat, with Goldschmidt fouling off five full count pitches.
In the second, Venable hit a fly that Marlins right fielder Ozuna treated as if it was a routine ball. That threw off Venable, who hesitated out of the box before jogging down the first base line. Ozuna threw up his hands and shook his head looking for the ball — it landed seven rows up in the right field porch.
Phillies 6, Giants 2: Chase Utley had three hits, including a homer. Ryan Howard homered too, as the
Giants Phillies knocked in five runs off Tim Lincecum. Maybe they just needed a trip to the west coast to clear their heads. Works for me sometimes.
Tigers vs. Nationals: POSTPONED: I fly a starship across the Universe divide. And when I reach the other side. I’ll find a place to rest my spirit if I can. Perhaps I may become a highwayman again. Or I may simply be a single drop of rain. But I will remain. And I’ll be back again, and again and again and again and again.
- And That Happened: Monday’s scores and highlights 0
- Frank Wren fired as Braves GM, John Hart to take over on an interim basis 41
- AND DOWN THE STRETCH THEY COME! Sizing up the final week of the regular season 36
- Must-Click Link: Derek Jeter opens up. Seriously, he really does. 45
- And That Happened: Sunday’s scores and highlights 58
- Must-click link: Tommy Harper and the Red Sox’ racist past 58
- Settling the Score: Saturday’s results 34
- Matt Garza ejected after hitting Andrew McCutchen a second time 34
- Geddy Lee’s baseball obsession makes it really hard for me to hate Rush (123)
- It certainly looks like Barry Bonds’ criminal conviction is going to be overturned (107)
- Ron Washington claims he resigned because he cheated on his wife (103)
- Giants CEO Larry Baer thinks advertisements on uniforms are coming soon (88)
- Umpire ejects jackwagon fan heckling Bryce Harper in Atlanta last night (85)