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Kerry Wood found a dead body

Jun 26, 2013, 8:53 AM EST

Kerry Wood AP

No, it wasn’t Andre Dawson in the Ivy. From the Chicago Tribune:

Former Cubs pitcher Kerry Wood discovered a man’s body floating in the water while out in Belmont Harbor, police said.  Wood was paddle boarding around 11:10 a.m. Monday when he saw the body, according to police.  “Mr. Wood immediately notified 911 of this discovery,” according to a police report.

Turns out it was a patient who had been reporting missing from a nursing home.

  1. pandaaa69 - Jun 26, 2013 at 9:00 AM

    Oh no, did Aaron Hernandez move to Chicago? Or did Ray Lewis beat him to it?

    • apkyletexas - Jun 26, 2013 at 3:56 PM

      That’s messed up. You can’t blame every dead body on Lewis and Hernandez. Just the majority of them.

    • pbastille - Jul 2, 2013 at 4:14 PM

      There didn’t appear to be any sign of a coverup, so I’m guessing RayRay and Dead-Eye Hernandez are off the hook.

  2. heyblueyoustink - Jun 26, 2013 at 9:02 AM

    Did he first examine the elbows, tricepts, and shoulders for structural integrity?

  3. waiverclaim - Jun 26, 2013 at 9:04 AM

    Que Law & Order http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-8lDYrvTILc

  4. rollinghighwayblues - Jun 26, 2013 at 9:23 AM

    Ray Brower?

    • bigmeechy74 - Jun 26, 2013 at 9:27 AM

      LOL nice. I didn’t know Kerry wood hung out with Teddy and Vern

      • recoveringcubsfan - Jun 26, 2013 at 9:43 AM

        Other side of the line, I’m afraid. When the cops came, Wood told them he was just there to pull a few steelhead out of the river.

    • DelawarePhilliesFan - Jun 26, 2013 at 9:42 AM

      Puff, puff, puff…..

      Breathlessly running in to make first Stand By Me joke ….

      Beaten to the punch!

  5. historiophiliac - Jun 26, 2013 at 9:34 AM

    Creepy and sad. RIP, old person.

  6. mybrunoblog - Jun 26, 2013 at 9:36 AM

    Later, Kerry Wood tweeted this @kwood “Just found a dead guy. I’m calling Dale Sveum to see if they’re still looking for that 5th starter because I think we got him right here”

  7. andreweac - Jun 26, 2013 at 10:24 AM

    Are we certain another NFL player didn’t kill an innocent civilian?

  8. deathmonkey41 - Jun 26, 2013 at 11:27 AM

    The autopsy still has to be completed, but Brian Cashman believes this man’s death is a direct result of A-Rod going on Twitter.

  9. michaeljacksonisback - Jun 26, 2013 at 12:15 PM

    Arron Hernandez was recently on vacation in Chicago huh?!!

  10. DiscountMescan - Jun 26, 2013 at 12:26 PM

    Bartman has finally been located. Moises Alou is still pissing and moaning somewhere.

    • derklempner - Jun 28, 2013 at 12:46 AM

      Moises Alou is still pissing on his hands and moaning somewhere.

      FTFY.

  11. Old Gator - Jun 26, 2013 at 3:11 PM

    When the rolled the body over, it turned out to be the Cubs’ season.

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